Minor to major arguments

[Neapolitanicecream]

DH has just said I’m miserable to be with, always picking up on him and miserable and to not talk to him. I asked him to put his washing away. I’ve been unwell and he has brought me cups of tea. We been married nearly 20 years. How do I turn things around ? I don’t want to be that person but I can’t say anything about getting things done around here without being told I’m messy back.

It sounds like he criticised you when you asked him to do something around the house? And then he gave you the silent treatment?

Is this a one off or has this sort of thing (criticisms and silent treatment) happened before?

Have you only asked him to put some washing away, or has it been a stream of requests?

Yes I did ask him to flush loo after use, and to reflush to needed. I don’t want to be that wife, but somethings need pointing out. Perhaps we are in a rut and I feel he’s quick to throw everything away if I ask him reasonably