Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how parents deal with virus hell?

65 replies

Virushell · 28/10/2021 03:38

I'm at my wit's end with viruses. It is all so much worse this year!

My toddler had a virus that lasted about 2 weeks causing a bad cough and multiple night wakings. Once he got better my newborn got bronchiolitis which caused about 2 weeks of sleepless nights and we're still not over it. I've spent the last three hours up with him having coughing fits and vomiting. He's settling now but I can hear my toddler coughing and whimpering so he'll probably be calling me in a minute.

He had the start of a rash earlier and his nursery is rife with hand foot mouth so I guess that's next.

How the hell do parents deal with this? Looking after poorly children is bad enough but when each virus brings a week or two of disturbed ( at best, but mostly non existent) sleep, it's a nightmare. On top of normal exhaustion from having a newborn. I only have two children and it feels impossible, how do people manage with 3 or 4 or More? Am I just weak?

OP posts:
Mudandrain · 28/10/2021 07:04

Totally feel for you. My two are just recovering too and still have lots of wake ups in the night. It is hell and coffee is my only tip.

lovebeingmum9 · 28/10/2021 07:20

Its hard work I feel for you! Hang in there your doing a brilliant job 💐
I've got 4 children and currently 33wks pregnant with our 5th 😊 coughs,colds and illnesses are like part of the furniture here now.....I think because of the lock downs everyone's immune systems are lower so everything seems to be lingering longer! Be careful as our newborn had bronchiolitis pretty bad at 4weeks old and we ended up in hospital for 5 days with him on oxygen! Hope you all get well soon and hopefully by getting it out the way now you will have a lovely illness free Christmas x

olderthanyouthink · 28/10/2021 07:24

We bounce from one illness to another because DD 3yrs gets everything under the sun. We've got a 3 month old too and thankfully he's not caught anything too bad yet despite his sister infecting her dad and I. Maybe breastfeeding is helping DS but it doesn't seem to have helped DD and a HV I spoke to was stunned that she get sick so much.

Oh and DD never really slept very well till recently so I never had a full nights sleep illness or no.

Rosebel · 28/10/2021 07:25

My 16 month old catches absolutely everything. Honestly it feels like he's got no immune system half the time. It takes him weeks to get over anything too.
He usually passes it on to the rest of us but my daughter's are a lot older.
I do remember when both my daughter lwere little and sick they were like a tag team one would fall asleep and then she other would wake up crying.
It's really hard and no advice except to let you know that eventually it gets better. That's what I keep reminding myself.

Bunnycat101 · 28/10/2021 07:28

We’ve had some awful times with illnesses with my 2. It does really take it out of you. I have found it got better after about 4 though. My eldest is 5 and other than covid and covid isolation I don’t think she had a day off last year but my youngest had the horrible cold recently and woke up constantly at night for about 3 weeks.

I’ve found it also seems to come in waves. My youngest was constantly Ill from 9 months to 12 months with a few hospital stays. The worst period for my eldest was when she was 2 and had a 3m period where she kept getting nasty sickness bugs as was really poorly. I was heavily pregnant and it was awful.

Laney39 · 28/10/2021 07:28

My dd has been off school 5 seperate times since September! Every week feels like a new virus.
For coughs and colds making the bathroom really steamy and using olbus oil or vicks in there while reading a book seems to help!
The only nasal spray that helps is sterimar spray.
It's not even November yet, could be a long winter!!

Pandaly · 28/10/2021 07:29

It's awful. And if you both work and have limited outside nursery childcare support then you end up with work on both your cases for having to have time off.

londonrach · 28/10/2021 07:32

It's really bad this year as no one come into contact with bugs due to the mask. I've stopped wearing the mask apart from a few locations now to try and get some exposure to bugs.

It's awful when DC are ill and can be ongoing. Sorry can't help op

PieMistee · 28/10/2021 07:33

Back in about 2008 my kids managed to have a 17 week run of chicken pox, swine flu and hand, foot and mouth. The worst bit was when DH and I has flu as well. We had to manage 10 minute shifts of looking after the DC (aged 1, 3 and 4). We couldn't ask anyone for help as we might have passed on the illnesses and have no family close. It was hell. The things that got us through was ignoring the housework. Eating easy food. Being really nice to each other, Napping when they slept, and going to bed at 9pm (which I never have done).

Abitlost2 · 28/10/2021 07:33

I really feel for you op especially with a newborn! Hope you can all rest as much as possible. Can you keep your ds off nursery for a bit to build up their immune system a bit? I never sent my dcs to nursey until they were 3 ( personal reasons and work flexible hours) and my 3 dcs never experienced half the illnesses that their friends and cousins caught. They are older now and rarely ill still. A few colds are great for the immune system but totally disagree constant illnesses are. I can't believe dcs with foot and mouth are still able to attend nursery, that can make adults v ill also!
If you are breastfeeding your new baby , this is a great protector even longterm as it gives them antibodies against illnesses around them. Me and my dc have always eaten loads of garlic, this a really good food for boosting the immune system.

PieMistee · 28/10/2021 07:34

It was 2011 not 2008, not that that makes a difference!

Hangingtrousers · 28/10/2021 07:34

You aren't alone.
I have 3 children and we have had every virus going since August.. htm, vom and poo bugs, colds galore. Basically always a child sick. Honestly dreading the next few months because I'm so done! Added to that organising work around sick kids. Ughhhh

HairyScaryMonster · 28/10/2021 07:35

Lack of sleep is definitely a killer. Do get your OH to help out where possible, say looking after children from 6am so you can feed and roll over back to sleep hopefully, and you go off to sleep mega early when he's home. Whether it's a nap or for the night.

Abitlost2 · 28/10/2021 07:37

I agree with above poster, i had 3 dcs close together and no family support so if we got ill I would set up the sitting room so it was safe, cartoons on and tried to rest. If you aren't taking it I would recommend taking a really good multi-vit and iron.

stripetop · 28/10/2021 07:38

Another one here. Two, two and under. October has been ridiculous. Norovirus, Jesus, runny nose for the month, a chest infection, tonsillitis, another chest infection, baby then bronciolitis. Then I got something off them, just to make life even easier. Nearly ended up in hospital.

Now we have conjunctivitis and I see the noses are running again. Want to cry.

Frankzappa22 · 28/10/2021 07:39

My two are exactly the same. Ill constantly since late august. I do find that one of those humidifiers (wuth or without vicks/olbas oil) helps. I think blocked noses and breathing through the mouth makes their throats dry and make the coughs worse so the moist air helps a bit

whatswithtodaytoday · 28/10/2021 07:39

You are not alone. I only have one, coming up to 3 year old, but I am dreading this winter because he's getting ill so much and passing everything to us. I'm already run down and very behind in my work from being ill basically every week since schools went back, and I'm constantly checking him for signs of the next illness. Surely this can't keep on all winter? 😭

DoctorSnortles · 28/10/2021 07:52

Sympathy for all. It's so hard. DD used to catch everything.

You will eventually get through it. Drink coffee, eat food that you like (I developed a serious Danish pastry habit during the sleepless years), keep warm and just generally be as nice to yourself as you can. Ask your partner to do more (could he take a day off work to give you a breather?).

Take care. It will pass eventually.

Skatastic · 28/10/2021 07:52

We had a couple of years where one of our three was ill constantly. It was awful and contributed massively to me staying home with DS3 because a) I wouldn't have earned anything after nursery fees anyway and b) I was sick to death of everyone being sick and c) my work threatened to sack me cos I took so many sick days to look after them.

thelegohooverer · 28/10/2021 08:28

Do whatever is necessary to make your night times easier - bring cot into your room or a mattress on your floor. Make sure meds, drinks, bottle warmer or whatever you need is upstairs. Write down time, medicine and time next does is due each time you give so you’re not straining a sleepy brain trying to remember who has had what

Toddler can have honey which is absolutely brilliant for coughs. Give some or a drink after coughing fits to soothe the throat. Coughs can become persistent because after a while the cough causes irritation, then the irritation causes coughing, which causes irritation. Steroids can help with that if it gets bad but getting in early with the honey is better.

Newborns can’t have honey unfortunately. Feed again immediately after coughing so they get best chance of retaining some nutrition. Watch the nappies as that’s the best way of monitoring hydration and nutrition.

Air out the house every day . It’s easy forget to when you’re “keeping the heat in” and you might need to add humidity to the air if it’s too dry (damp towel in a radiator)

It’s such an incredibly tough phase. But it does pass, I promise. Hang in there.

KatyN · 28/10/2021 08:36

Such shit times. I remember them well but it does pass I promise. Mine are 5 and 9 now. With colds and stuff they just ask for calpol and carry a massive box of tissues everywhere! They still leave a trail of snotty tissues, mind. I think it’s once they are old enough to understand they are ill and take it easy.

Until then, try and rest where and when you can. Ask for all the help you can (mates to do your laundry or bring a meal, they will want to ask you on future!). And break those rules that you have during normal times : we cosleep when they are poorly, stay in pjs all day, eat at random times because that’s when they feel up to it.

Hang in there.

Oceanrudeness · 28/10/2021 08:38

I've just started back at work after maternity leave and the toddler (2.5) and baby (9 months) started nursery in September. We have honestly all been ill since they started there. They've both had coughs and colds which lasted 5 weeks. With the baby, it went to his chest so needed antibiotics. He's also had a vomiting bug, and this week, to top it off, I've contracted hand, foot and mouth!!! I've had to have my second week back from mat leave off as sick. Anyway, yeah it's awful!

Bumfaceffs · 28/10/2021 08:38

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

Emsie1987 · 28/10/2021 08:43

Yep I am in the same situation with my two year old. No sleep, having to take time off work for viruses which adds to the stress as they are not happy. Life is pretty miserable.

I would say if you can try and keep your oldest off nursery for a couple of weeks until his fully better and immunity is back to normal levels. He may be less likely to get another virus. I had to do this last year but it broke the cycle of being ill back to back. Don't have that option this year with work.

troppibambini6 · 28/10/2021 09:00

It's shit.
We have 4 and we still shudder when we remember "that winter" basically all of them were ill continuously for the whole winter with some really nasty things.
It's so much better now they are older but you have my sympathy.