Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask you to help me make a decision re. home birth?

174 replies

user124765 · 24/10/2021 10:04

Posting here for traffic after no response on the Childbirth forum.

I'll try to keep this brief. Fourth child due in January. I'm aged 41.
Because of my age I'm being consultant led throughout this pregnancy. I'm otherwise fit and healthy.
The consultant is urging me to be induced on my due date. I'm not overly keen on this idea, having been induced at 12 days overdue with DC2 and it was a really unpleasant experience.
One of the main reasons, beside being 'geriatric', is that I labour very quickly. My third child was born in the hospital car park after a 40 minute labour. They seem to be getting faster and faster.
Would you have a homebirth in my situation? I'm being told it's too dangerous. Is that really the case though?

I've had a retained placenta and haemorrhage after the induction with DC2, but other than that I've had normal easy births. Just very quick!

OP posts:
DressedUpAtAnIvy · 24/10/2021 14:02

If you won’t have an induction and don’t want to go into labour an elective section seems the only real option as long as previous haemorrhage isn’t a contraindication.

parttimemary · 24/10/2021 14:07

@oftenithinkaboutit not really but ok

ditalini · 24/10/2021 14:09

There is an increased risk of placental failure in older mothers. I requested induction at term based on this (aged 40, uncomplicated 2nd pregnancy)

As it was, I went into spontaneous labour 2 days before and it was extremely quick. Luckily we didnt wait for our childcare and just took ds1 to the hospital to wait for them their. Dh was just in time to see ds2 born.

I had quite a bit of bloodloss and the placenta was visably more ragged than with ds1. I ended up with an infection a few days later.

In your shoes I'd go for induction and have a plan to drop everything and get in the car at the first twinge. If your dh ends up having to stay in the waiting room with your dc then, while not ideal, it'll not be for long if your labour is too quick for your childcare to get there.

SnackSizeRaisin · 24/10/2021 14:11

If the only risk is your age, then what exactly is that risk?

Age increases the risk of complications a lot. It also increases the risk of the placenta failing which is why they want to avoid you going over. Placenta failing can lead to stillbirth and also haemorrhage.
4th pregnancy also increases the risk.
That plus distance from hospital makes it seem a bad idea. It is more likely to be fine than not but if it goes wrong it doesn't bear thinking about.

Tillysfad · 24/10/2021 14:12

I don't think so after the difficult second birth and the fact that ambulances barely exist now.

C8H10N4O2 · 24/10/2021 14:12

Thank you. I'll do some research, but given the general consensus here that I'd be foolish to risk a home birth, I think I'm discounting it as an option.

I had a complicated first birth and my others were home births. The advisability of home birth after a birth with complications depends a lot on the specifics around your case.

I echo the advice to speak to the home birth team/community midwife as well as discussing what happened when you were induced and if that was a factor in the haemorrhage. Then make a decision after getting their input.

stingofthebutterfly · 24/10/2021 14:19

Do you live near an alongside birth centre? I was high risk, previous massive haemorrhage after induction, and managed to negotiate a birth centre water birth with my fifth child.

I wouldn't have considered a home birth, I don't think, but there's surely a compromise somewhere along the way, even if it's just a midwife led room in a consultant unit.

Draineddraineddrained · 24/10/2021 14:19

I do think it's interest that the only time you've had a haemorrhage was when you were induced,but everyone is using that as a reason to be induced Hmm

I think you are between a rock and a hard place and I'm sorry! I'd want to be in the hospital given your history but I wouldn't want to be induced, since left to itself your body seems to labour well whereas on the one occasion you've had intervention you've had subsequent dangerous complications.

Maybe put it to your consultant that you would like to labour in hospital but do not want to be induced due to your history and see what they say? Would balloon induction potentially be worth considering?

whosaidtha · 24/10/2021 14:21

Having an induction means you'll definitely be in the hospital not a car park and gives your mum time to get down to look after the kids as you know the exact day.

Concestor · 24/10/2021 14:24

I would. I've had two home births and an considered high risk plus with my second I was considered old. You've had three births without incident, only one with, and you are clearly well informed and able to weigh up your risks. Id suggest you have a chat with a consultant midwife rather than the doctor (who only sees high risk births and therefore will always err towards hospital and intervention) and really look at the individual risks to you based on your hospital data. Then you can make a decision.
Also bear in mind that depending on where you are, your home birth service may be suspended due to staff shortages or ambulance service being unable to offer cover).

ThePlantsitter · 24/10/2021 14:26

I would talk to the community midwives and take their advice seriously because if they say they wouldn't want to risk it they're the ones you're trusting.

It is difficult to sift through the 'do as you're told, good girl' shite sometimes but if you've had a haemorrhage before, you're over 40 and crucially your H is not on board, I wouldn't risk it personally.

LeaderoftheAteam · 24/10/2021 14:29

@Draineddraineddrained my thoughts exactly. All the other posters seem to be missing the glaring coincidence that the PPH happened after an induction (one of the many risks associated).

If I were you, I would speak to your local home birth team. I would personally go for a homebirth given the fact you labour quickly. However, if I had to I would rather a planned C-section before ever being induced.

Draineddraineddrained · 24/10/2021 14:29

Also dispiriting howamy people think you wouldn't be "allowed" to have a home birth, however risky it is. As long as the patient has the capacity to understand the risk and make the choice, she can birth where she chooses. This lack of understanding re women's right to make choices about their pregnancy and birth is what leads to obstetric violence and trauma.

TheChiefJo · 24/10/2021 14:37

[quote LeaderoftheAteam]@Draineddraineddrained my thoughts exactly. All the other posters seem to be missing the glaring coincidence that the PPH happened after an induction (one of the many risks associated).

If I were you, I would speak to your local home birth team. I would personally go for a homebirth given the fact you labour quickly. However, if I had to I would rather a planned C-section before ever being induced.[/quote]
This is good advice.

C8H10N4O2 · 24/10/2021 14:40

As long as the patient has the capacity to understand the risk and make the choice, she can birth where she chooses

Agree with your points but at the moment, mine and many other areas are not offering home births citing staff shortages.
I find this very depressing as I had to push for home births in the 90s (one GP actually told me they were illegal...) but the community midwifery team were brilliant. The care I received at a home birth was much better than in hospital. We seem to be going backwards

Oftenithinkaboutit · 24/10/2021 15:00

[quote parttimemary]@oftenithinkaboutit not really but ok[/quote]
You understand probability?

If we’d been talking about a GP, I would have said “she” as women out number men GPs by 2 to 1

It’s not difficult

Oftenithinkaboutit · 24/10/2021 15:02

I’m aghast at people saying
“I would”

You are going against the OP’s consultant. An expert. Who has examined her. Who knows the detail of her history.

And we are talking about something bloody serious. A life.

And you feel ok encouraging the OP to go against medical advice.

Fine to say your experience with no reference to what the op should or shouldn’t do.

But to actually encourage? Reckless

JustLyra · 24/10/2021 15:53

@Oftenithinkaboutit

I’m aghast at people saying “I would”

You are going against the OP’s consultant. An expert. Who has examined her. Who knows the detail of her history.

And we are talking about something bloody serious. A life.

And you feel ok encouraging the OP to go against medical advice.

Fine to say your experience with no reference to what the op should or shouldn’t do.

But to actually encourage? Reckless

And if the standard of maternity care was high there would likely be less. But we all know it’s not so there’s absolutely no surprise that people are encouraging the OP to investigate all of her options carefully.

Especially when many consultants just dismiss home births out of hand (and I say that as someone who doesn’t think the op should have one in her circs)

AlexaShutUp · 24/10/2021 15:54

Yeah, totally your choice but I wouldn't risk it personally.

Oftenithinkaboutit · 24/10/2021 15:55

@JustLyra

Did you read my post?
I have no problem with posters encouraging the op to “investigate her options”.
Indeed that’s very wise

But to actively encourage? No. Do you disagree?

JustLyra · 24/10/2021 15:55

@C8H10N4O2

As long as the patient has the capacity to understand the risk and make the choice, she can birth where she chooses

Agree with your points but at the moment, mine and many other areas are not offering home births citing staff shortages.
I find this very depressing as I had to push for home births in the 90s (one GP actually told me they were illegal...) but the community midwifery team were brilliant. The care I received at a home birth was much better than in hospital. We seem to be going backwards

It will be very interesting to see how many areas use the current situation to do away with home births.

Round here they’ve been telling women they don’t do them for years. You have to push every time. Even back five years ago in Labour you have to be really firm with them that you’re staying home.

JustLyra · 24/10/2021 15:56

[quote Oftenithinkaboutit]@JustLyra

Did you read my post?
I have no problem with posters encouraging the op to “investigate her options”.
Indeed that’s very wise

But to actively encourage? No. Do you disagree?[/quote]
The OP is an adult. She’ll make her choices so it’s hardly something to get her up about.

Telling someone that they’d have a Hb in her shoes is a very valid thing.

If the OP was any further away from the hospital I’d also be encouraging a HB - for quick labours it’s safer than a taxi.

Oftenithinkaboutit · 24/10/2021 16:04

Head. Wall

plantastic · 24/10/2021 16:09

It's a very individual choice and only you can make the call. I did have a hb with my second and was at elevated risk of haemorrhage (I didn't haemorrhage with my first, but for other reasons). I discussed it with the homebirth team quite extensively and was happy with the options for management. I opted for a managed 3rd stage at home for that reason. I did bleed about 800mls in the pool but felt fine (I am tall and have a lot to lose!) and was super pleased I was at home as I think it would have been dealt with as more of a problem at hospital and I had 2 very experienced midwives. I had something of a precipitate labour both times (not 30 minutes fast but swift) - the midwifery team's advice was to go for home for that reason.

I'd also been monitored very closely as I had a placental failure (possibly undiagnosed pre eclampsia) with my first, so was scanned every week for growth towards the end. I had a fantastic home birth. There are some Facebook groups that can advise you on discussions with a consultant- they do skew, for obvious reasons, very pro though so approach with that in mind.

Ozanj · 24/10/2021 16:24

A history Fast births plus your age mean you are at very high of preclampsia. I really wouldn’t take the risk.