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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To never use eBay again

90 replies

Pencilandpaper · 22/10/2021 21:55

Used to use eBay loads but haven’t sold anything for over a couple of years. I have a sofa I need to sell due to moving house, it’s branded and in excellent condition so fairly high value. I listed it very clearly as collection in person with my town.

Anyway, item ends and the winning bidder immediately messages me telling me wrap the sofa “like a newborn baby” Hmm I messaged back stating that I hadn’t included packing materials cost, so no it won’t be packaged. She then tells me it will be collected by courier on one of two days! So I reply again, saying as stated it was collection in person and I’m not sending a high value item unwrapped with a courier, nor am I staying in for two days waiting for it to be collected.

Since then I have had no end of grief trying to sort. She messaged me constantly, being very rude. I reported her but have heard nothing on my report. Whenever I try to get hold of someone at eBay, their website is like a maze - eventually you stumble on a live chat who may or may not be able to help. I tried to refund the buyer but it kept saying there was an issue with my account. Finally got through to an agent who managed to refund for me so i thought all resolved..only to find today I have been stung with final value selling fees and negative feedback from the buyer.

Aibu that eBay is such a stressful experience. I’m closing my account!

OP posts:
Time40 · 22/10/2021 23:03

You can't claim non arrival of collection only item

Yes, you can. People can and do. They pay by PayPal, collect the item, and then claim that the item never arrived. Ebay don't care - they always favour the buyer, and will refund. It's a known scam. I always used to put "cash on collection only" on my collect-in-person listings, but several years ago Ebay made it impossible to remove the PayPal payment option. If the PayPal option is there, people will pay by PayPal whatever the listing says.

dottypencilcase · 22/10/2021 23:04

I totally understand OP. I sold a beautiful, high-dining table a few months ago with a partial glass top. It went for pennies vs what I'd paid for it but I needed a more child-friendly table that wouldn't make me wince each time the DC went near it. Anyway, buyer came to collect it in a caravan (!) after examining it like they were a forensic expert. All good. Until i got an alert the next day saying they'd opened a case against me because of chips to the glass, missing xyz, scratches to the base, etc. There was no way I was accepting that table back in the condition they'd described because the table had been in near mint condition. Ebay the bastards decided in the buyers favour (they had PayPal buyer protection and eBay buyer guarantee or whatever it's called) so I was without a dining table and the paltry amount I got for it was taken away from me too! Never again!

dottypencilcase · 22/10/2021 23:05

High-end*

Time40 · 22/10/2021 23:06

BTW it looks like the not received scam on collection items might not be as simple now. In collection items the buyer is emailed a code to give to the seller proving collection.
As I say, it's all changed

Oooh! Interesting!

Twofurrycats · 22/10/2021 23:06

Ring ebay. Preferably in a morning as you seem to get the Irish call centre who are good to deal with (in my experience anyway).
In this case, I would accept the buyer using a courier if they asked first. But I would want to arrange the courier and invoice the customer for it. That way you can control the collection time and you are the courier's customer. If the item is lost or damaged you want the cover. You can end up with a damaged item that you have to refund and the buyer is able to claim from the courier not you.
I always used to specify cash for collection only but I think ebay now send a code to scan as proof of collection.

LizzieMacQueen · 22/10/2021 23:09

@MyCatHatesWhiskas That's been my experience too. Why would a genuine customer, who's not received your item, refuse to engage ? Smells of a con. But as you know, eBay sides with the buyer. I have successfully claimed off of Royal Mail though.

LoganRoy · 22/10/2021 23:10

It does feel more of a hassle now. You were right not to accept the courier. Do try and contact them again, you should get the fee back and they should definitely remove the feedback. Couriers or postage should be arranged before the item is sold.

AdobeWanKenobi · 22/10/2021 23:11

But that's pretty much the percentage you paid in fees before they changed the payment system?!

Probably?!
But when you are paid into PayPal and then charged your fees at a later date you don't really notice how much that it as it's two separate transactions over separate dates. To see it come through at that on a rounded figure made me realise just how much eBay were charging, and when I can sell on marketplace or vinted for free it's a no brainer.

Original poster
Pencilandpaper · 22/10/2021 23:16

It was more the damage I was worried about. She is 200 miles away! Sending it unprotected would likely damage it, or they could claim it came damaged and what rights would I have? Also the messages were so presumptuous, telling me how to wrap it etc yet no p&p paid for or mentioned.
@dottypencilcase so sorry to hear your experience, that’s awful!

OP posts:
Tavelo · 22/10/2021 23:23

God I remember I once sold a brand new ipod years ago so new it hadn't even been opened and I sent it recorded and the buyer tried to say it was fake. Just shows what utter swines the general population aware. Makes me despise people to be honest

SourMilkGhyll · 22/10/2021 23:24

eBay is so irritating these days. Sold an item, listed with 6 photos that clearly show a damaged area on the item. Seller receives item and gets upset because it is damaged, EXACTLY LIKE THE PHOTOS SHOW!
End up having to refund and pay both lots of postage.

Bobsyer · 22/10/2021 23:28

YANBU. I had an account years ago which worked fine, but I didn't use it for such a long time it either closed or I had forgotten the details.

I opened a new one specifically to sell some specific small items. The actual palaver of trying to sell these items, the fucking CHEEK of some people to ask me to discount more than 50% AND offer free delivery for items in perfect condition. Then, despite selling to 10+ people, only getting 2 reviews - marked as positive but no comments. Also the faff with Paypal, who made me change it to a Business account for no reason that I could see other than to charge me more fees.

I sold those items and then closed the account in a fit of rage after eBay decided to troll me with a minimum of three emails a day, even though I'd said I didn't want any marketing contact at all. That continued for more than a month until they had actually closed the account.

It is all so petty, but my god it enraged me. I'd honestly rather just take stuff to the recycling centre than sell it nowadays!

Siameasy · 23/10/2021 00:44

That all sounds awful. I agree their website is like a pile of spaghetti; the app is ok but Vinted is brilliant so far for me.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 23/10/2021 01:02

I wouldn't see any issue with using a courier either - if the courier were the same sex (even then he could claim to be her DH) and in an unmarked vehicle, you wouldn't even necessarily know that it wasn't the buyer - but they need to agree a reasonable time slot and take responsibility for authorising the courier to check the item on their behalf: any breakages or 'not as described' later are entirely between the buyer and courier.

As it's being collected in person, though, rather than sent through the post (with proof of posting), I would also insist that the courier pay cash on collection - non-negotiable.

I don't think I'd object to helping out with some cardboard, plastic dust sheet or other similar cheap protection, but the 'like a newborn baby' demand is extremely strange.

KrisAkabusi · 23/10/2021 02:11

No. Collect in person means that they're responsible for safely packing and transporting it. A courier collection puts the onus back on the seller. No way.

IndecentCakes · 23/10/2021 02:17

I refused a courier collection. It was a pram, I'm not wrapping a pram!

Bogeyes · 23/10/2021 04:50

They are trying to scam you. Mark the item as unpaid and report them.

ElftonWednesday · 23/10/2021 05:02

I wouldn't bother with Facebook marketplace either for collection only. You just get loads of timewasters who are too far away and don't turn up, or ask you to post a large, free item. I only ever use local groups, most people on there are friends of friends so there is a little less anonymity, which can help.

Chunkymenrock · 23/10/2021 06:04

Use gumtree. Much better for local items.

Original poster
Pencilandpaper · 23/10/2021 06:58

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll

I wouldn't see any issue with using a courier either - if the courier were the same sex (even then he could claim to be her DH) and in an unmarked vehicle, you wouldn't even necessarily know that it wasn't the buyer - but they need to agree a reasonable time slot and take responsibility for authorising the courier to check the item on their behalf: any breakages or 'not as described' later are entirely between the buyer and courier.

As it's being collected in person, though, rather than sent through the post (with proof of posting), I would also insist that the courier pay cash on collection - non-negotiable.

I don't think I'd object to helping out with some cardboard, plastic dust sheet or other similar cheap protection, but the 'like a newborn baby' demand is extremely strange.

You would always know it’s a courier, they would tell you or it would be obvious when speaking to them. Agree with the points you have made but even if they agree to take responsibility, I don’t think that would mean anything if something did happen to the item/the buyer claimed it was damaged before but you become the one “posting” it
OP posts:
Original poster
Pencilandpaper · 23/10/2021 07:00

@Bogeyes

They are trying to scam you. Mark the item as unpaid and report them.
I did, this was a couple of weeks ago and have t heard anything about me reporting them - however they reported me and I then got my account suspended! Really unfair. They also could leave me negative feedback which they did yesterday and I can’t leave them any, only positive
OP posts:
RedHelenB · 23/10/2021 07:07

A couple of times ds wanted to sell old electronic games. They were a fair price but each time sonething was " wrong ". He did get the games back but it was a lot of hassle and ended up costing me money with postage and returns. Won't use it again to buy or sell.

knittingaddict · 23/10/2021 07:12

@StepAwayFromGoogling

I'd assume 'collecting in person' means a courier could collect on your behalf.
Have you ever used Ebay? That's a really bad idea for the seller and not something that ebay would support. It is up to the seller to arrange delivery IF THEY WISH TO. There are all sorts of scams involving buyers arranging their own couriers as the seller has to prove delivery in the event of a dispute.

Personally I would stick it on gumtree and expect to almost give it away. Second hand sofas don't really seem to sell well for some reason.

Redrosesandsunsets · 23/10/2021 07:20

I once sold a big lot of expensive school uniform on there and someone bought it and paid by PayPal. They wanted to come and collect it so they came by train to pick up package (so I had no proof of package once picked up, after they had left).
They went home and pulled the money back from PayPal!!! They got my items and didn’t pay.
I learned you have to show proof the item was picked up or sent by post (normally by post so a postal receipt counts). So without me taking a photo of this man on my doorstep physically picking up the package I had no proof of this. I tried to track said man down. He closed his account and eBay were hopeless and didn’t care. Neither did PayPal. Never again. Expensive lesson learned. Some people are so brazen. He was an old man. Said it was for his granddaughter. All BS. He scams people for a living.

Sally090807 · 23/10/2021 07:50

The whole thing is a total nightmare. I sold some expensive shoes that belonged to my daughter, I sent them via Hermes and paid extra for guaranteed delivery. They were picked up from my local store but never made it to the main sorting hub. Hermes offered me £20 and I’ve had to refund the buyer £130 and my daughters £180 shoes have been “lost”.