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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To just get sterilised?

28 replies

lemonorlime · 22/10/2021 20:37

You're going to just have to trust it really is this bad.

I have dreadful PMS to extreme levels. The week before I get my period I am so anxious and angry and out of control I can't function. I can be genuinely suicidal. Then my period arrives and by day 2 I'm a normal person.

It's got to the point that I don't sleep as I'm filled with anxiety, I shout at my children which is completely out of character. I have huge rows with my husband whereby I scream and shout. I get so anxious about tiny problems I lay in bed wanting to die. I just can't go on anymore and I don't know what to do.

I've tried the pill but it made me worse, I was depressed and erratic. I've tried every other form of contraception you can think of.

I've had bloods and all normal.

I've tried sertraline but it didn't work for me. GP is reluctant to try any other antidepressants as I'm breastfeeding and TTC.

I'm considering once I have my second baby (if I ever fall pregnant again) getting sterilised afterwards to stop this absolute hell. Is that mad? Would it even work?

I know this all seems so dramatic but it honestly is. I've kept a log before on numerous times and it's always linked to my cycle, I'm a perfectly well person otherwise. My husband agrees but is at his wits end.

I've been like this as long as I can remember.

OP posts:
Ellextra · 22/10/2021 20:40

Hi, have you heard of PMDD?

Pre menstrual dysphoric disorder

Can be exacerbated by peri menopause

Original poster
lemonorlime · 22/10/2021 20:41

I have heard of it, and I'm sure it is this, but I can't make it stop.

I'm not of an age whereby I'd be thinking peri menopause

OP posts:
WhateverIdo · 22/10/2021 20:44

Sterilisation wouldn't change anything. It literally just removes the tubes.
You would need an oophrectomy to remove ovaries and I can't see them performing that unnecessarily.
Try different antidepressants, ask for a referral to an endocrinologist?

Aquamarine1029 · 22/10/2021 20:45

Getting steralised would not help you. Only your fallopian tubes are cut/cauterized/clamped when you have your tubes tied. Your ovaries and uterus remain intact. You need to go to a hormone specialist.

Ellextra · 22/10/2021 20:45

Peri can start much younger than you'd think (30's even)

But as you say, it seems to have been an issue for a while anyway.

I'm not sure I can offer any advice beyond suggesting PMDD, I haven't had too much success with my own hormonal issues....

HRT is helping me at the moment but it's been a long road x

swampytiggaa · 22/10/2021 20:45

My periods got heavier after being sterilised sorry. Think it was the lack of artificial hormones.

Original poster
lemonorlime · 22/10/2021 20:48

I'm in my mid 20's so wouldn't have thought it linked to the menopause.

GP won't prescribe any other anti-depressants due to wanting another baby and safety. To be honest I'm desperate to be pregnant again as although pregnancy hormones are bad in their own way it's nothing compared to this.

I understand this is likely PMDD but there's no treatment other than antidepressants that aren't available to me and I can't go on like this.

GP is refusing there is any hormonal issue as bloods all normal.

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 22/10/2021 20:50

You need to see a specialist.

Original poster
lemonorlime · 22/10/2021 20:52

Can anyone suggest what kind of specialist I should see?

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 22/10/2021 20:53

I would start with a gynae, especially one who specialises in peri-menopause/menopause. You may not be officially in peri yet, but your hormonal issues might be similar.

Aquamarine1029 · 22/10/2021 20:54

I would also keep a very detailed diary of each day, diet, how you're feeling, moods, period start dates, etc. It may be very useful.

TheCanyon · 22/10/2021 20:55

There was a really good thread on here not so long ago about pmdd and what helped them. For context, I don't suffer from pmt at all but read the thread from start to finish absolutely horrified/surprised at what people have to suffer and it really opened my eyes. Will try find the thread for you

MaudebeGonne · 22/10/2021 20:56

Can you see a Perinatal Psychiatrist? Maybe get a referral from your GP or go private if you can afford it. They will have the best knowledge of what antidepressants would work best for you considering your desire to extend your family.

Original poster
lemonorlime · 22/10/2021 20:57

Has anyone had this kind of treatment privately and would know what I'd be looking at in terms of cost? Obviously not expecting anything precise but a rough amount to know if it's feasible or not.

I can't at all see my GP changing tactic and actually being helpful on this.

OP posts:
LlamaLasagne · 22/10/2021 20:58

A friend saw Professor John Stud in London and it was life changing. He did the initial assessments and prescribing of right levels of hormones and then her GP continued.

Original poster
lemonorlime · 22/10/2021 20:59

@TheCanyon thank you.

I saw a perinatal psychiatrist and it's basically sertraline, but unfortunately it didn't work for me despite a range of doses.

OP posts:
TheCanyon · 22/10/2021 20:59

Not the thread I'm thinking of but the opening post is quite hard hitting

DeepaBeesKit · 22/10/2021 21:00

I found my hormones were mad when I was still bf, but my periods had returned. It was like my body wasnt keen on me doing both at once and it sent me mental.

Have you always had this a bit? Or only now?

TheCanyon · 22/10/2021 21:00

Forgot the link www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/3647598-Go-on-then-PMDD

Original poster
lemonorlime · 22/10/2021 21:00

@LlamaLasagne I've heard of them but only for menopause but looking at their website PMS is included. Any idea on cost?

OP posts:
Original poster
lemonorlime · 22/10/2021 21:01

@DeepaBeesKit unfortunately for as long as I can remember.

OP posts:
Namechange12312 · 22/10/2021 21:04

It’s been said before but this sounds just like a friend of mine who has PMDD. it took a long time for her to be taken seriously by doctors and she had to do a lot of her own research but is now on medication which has changed her life.

MintyGreenDream · 22/10/2021 21:04

Sterilisation is less effective than the pill.I was told this by the doctor when I was thinking of having it done.

Ellextra · 22/10/2021 21:06

This site may have some usefulminfo:

www.viciouscyclepmdd.com/

LlamaLasagne · 22/10/2021 21:09

I think it was around £500 pre-Covid. She had PMDD not menopausal stuff. Sorry for vagueness!