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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be annoyed with MIL over Christmas presents.

23 replies

VanillaPumpkin · 10/12/2007 14:13

Actually I know I am a bit but I am really annoyed at the moment and so I am having a rant......
MIL asked at the beginning of Nov when she was visiting us what to get the dd's for Christmas. I came up with a couple of ideas for her about the £20-25 mark. During the conversation I said that I was going to ask my Dad to club together with my brother and sister and Auntie to get dd2 her first bike as they had done this for dd1. She got a decent bike for about £70. So MIL says oh please let me get dd2 her bike. I bought dd1 a pushchair for £70 when she was born and haven't bought dd2 anything big yet. I know MIL is a bit skint so say no, it is too much money, but she insists so I suggests she clubs in with BIL and DH's Gran (Are you following so far....?) She says no she will get it on her own. Fab we say, thank you. Any one will do as long as it isn't Barbie and is one that will last her (ie proper chain and real wheels). She got in a muddle and thought I said any bike as long as not pink and found a Bob the builder one and a Thomas one in Argos. The price of the 12 inch ones is £60 so we found a Angelina Ballerina one on sale for £55 that we knew dd would love. Last night she came back saying that it was too much money. She was only looking to spend £35-40. My Dad has already bought for dd2 as have we so now dd2 won't be getting a bike for Christmas .
The ones she was looking at in Argos were the 10inch ones that are actually trikes with the pedals on the wheel if you see what I mean. I am so disappointed and annoyed as I said in the blooming first place it was too expensive for one person to get .
So there you have it. It seems so petty now I have written it down. DD2 will just have to wait for her birthday, but that isn't until June .
Sadly we have an issue already with her not listening properly, or just hearing what she wants too and I just feel disappointed again.
So, tell me off now ....

OP posts:
mumblechum · 10/12/2007 14:16

Ok, get her to deliver the bike to you now with the receipt.

Go to wherever she bought it from and replace it.

Wrap it up with a tag from Grandma.

Is it going to be that simple??

mumblechum · 10/12/2007 14:17

Sorry, obviously didn't read your post properly.

Ask her for cash now. Add whatever you need on to buy the one you want.

Wrap with tag from grandma

Sparkletastic · 10/12/2007 14:17

I won't tell you off YANBU - is she a bit elderly and liable to confusion? Is there any chance BIL and DH's gran haven't bought anything for DD2 yet and could give her the difference? June is a long time to wait - was DD2 expecting / hoping for a bike?

clumsymum · 10/12/2007 14:19

She hasn't bought it yet?

Can you stretch to put £15 in~? Get the Angelina bike, let her pay her £40 and you pay the other £15?

TillyScoutsmum · 10/12/2007 14:20

Can you not give her the £15 to add to her £40 and ask her to get the Angelina one for £55 ?? Or see if BIL and DH's Gran have bought yet and whether they can contribute..?

BTW - I don't think YABU at all - just trying to think of a solution

crokky · 10/12/2007 14:22

agree with mumblechum, try and make up the difference yourself - perhaps you can take MIL to Argos or wherever and you can make sure she gets the one DD2 will like and give her the extra £15 or £20 so she can afford it. The main thing is that your DD2 is happy, even if this means you lose out on £15.

VanillaPumpkin · 10/12/2007 14:25

She is only 62, still works, very fit and capable and active usually (plays tennis still weekly and golf etc etc). DD2 is only 2.5 is certainly not expecting a bike thankfully, but would truly love it and we take dd1 out on hers quite a bit (nice quiet safe roads here) and dd2 has to be pushed on her trike. She is tall and physically capable for a bike IYSWIM. I think our best bet is for MIL to give the 'main' present we have bought (worth £35) and for us to blow the budget we had set ourselves (again ) and get the bike. I know you might think it is only £20 but our budgets are tight for a reason sigh.

OP posts:
Dropdeadfred · 10/12/2007 14:30

is there no relatives that have yet to buy for her? anyone who is likely to give her a £5 voucher etc that you could ask if you could add that money to the bike instead?

there mght be cheaper bikes available at Halfords etc?

ELR · 10/12/2007 14:33

mother in laws are like that!!!

Dropdeadfred · 10/12/2007 14:34

this one any good?

Dropdeadfred · 10/12/2007 14:35

or delivered for an extra £5?

VanillaPumpkin · 10/12/2007 14:36

Yes you are right. These are good ideas and I haven't investigated properly yet. BIL is still a chance but he and lovely SIL are on hol at the moment... Thank you for all these good alternatives, and for not shouting . I think I will be making sure dd2 gets the bike one way or another.......

OP posts:
Dropdeadfred · 10/12/2007 14:39

Quick! You get a free safety kit with this one!

Dropdeadfred · 10/12/2007 14:41

The one i mentione din post below is still only £39.99 so MIL could cough up for it!!

VanillaPumpkin · 10/12/2007 14:41

Dropdeadfred - That honeybee one would be great!!! She has a Halfords opposite where she works. Oh well done you, thank you! I feel happier now. She rang this morning about something else and I left the answer machine to get it and then texted her a reply. What a child I am! I truly don't want her to know I am disappointed though as it is obviously not a deliberate mistake, just a misunderstanding and I know that I won't even be bothered in a few days.....in fact I feel better already seeing that Honeybee bike. I just knew I wouldn't be able to speak to her this morning without saying something.....

OP posts:
Dropdeadfred · 10/12/2007 14:43

Glad to help..

VanillaPumpkin · 10/12/2007 20:58

All sorted! We found the present she was going to get us in a sale so she suggested she could put the extra money saved towards dd's bike. She really wanted to get the bike for dd too so I am really pleased it is all sorted and no harm done. She knows nothing of my annoyance thanks to you kind people listening to me vent (and finding me solutions!) Everybody is happy. I will just bear in mind her memory is perhaps not what it was and will now write down important things .
She is a lovely lady I feel bad about my annoyance now, but I am far too forgiving

OP posts:
Dropdeadfred · 11/12/2007 15:19

Hurray! All is well
You sound a very caring daughter in law and nice person!

VanillaPumpkin · 11/12/2007 16:36

. You obviously don't know me well .
After all that she couldn't get it from her Halfords as they sold the last one this morning so I have just reserved her one at another store in the next town. How controlling do I seem now??? Hope it seems more helpful . I am beginning to feel a tad obsessed now . DD2 had better bloody love it now!!!!!

OP posts:
Dropdeadfred · 11/12/2007 18:38

You didn't think of getting it delivered then?

VanillaPumpkin · 11/12/2007 20:53

Ah but who would pay the extra £5

OP posts:
bookofchristmascarolsmum · 11/12/2007 20:56

I'm glad it ended well

VanillaPumpkin · 11/12/2007 21:27

...

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