Would you let 16YO go to leeds fest

[Sonandfestival]

Disclaimer I am very overprotective and naturally anxious. His friends are wanting to go to leeds fest this summer. My first response was no wtf as I am really concerned about sex/STIs and pregnancy as well as drugs ect as well as excessive alcohol consumption and potential dangers. That being said last summer I know lots of my friends 16 year olds went. So I’m unsure Aibu to let DS go to leedsfest?

I'd let him if he was going with a group of friends that he knew well. I wouldn't if they were new friends though.

If you've advised him about condoms and the dangers of drugs, it's time to let go OP.

Yes I would. At 16 I wouldn’t have even “asked” my parents it would have just been mentioned in conversation.

I know it’s hard but you’ve just got to cut the apron strings or we’re going to end up with a nation of people who can’t think for themselves

I let my then 16 year old son go to Leeds fest with a group of friends. He came home covered in dried mud, slept for a day and then told me what a fantastic time he’d had.

I understand your concern but I’d let him go.

When he's 18 you'll have the same worries and no control over what he does at all. So I'd start to let him do things now while you still hand some say so you can build up a relationship based on mutual respect and trust. Surely you've discussed safe sex and drug use before now?

Yes, absolutely. I first went when I was 15 in a group of 3, it was my first taste of "independence". These were the days before ubiquitous mobile phones too - we had one between the three of us to ring to say we had got there safely, then we turned it off for 3 days because we were worried about battery life! These days a daily check-in would be much easier to facilitate!

Although there are the dangers you outline, festivals are largely pretty safe spaces with everybody there just wanting to have a good time.

When I went, my Dad even bought us 48 cans of lager because he didn't want us trying any daft tricks or hanging out with "wronguns" as he put it to get booze underage. I always respected my parents for letting me go.

This is hypocritical because I went to Reading at 16 but I'd think twice tbh. Do an advanced search and have a read of the thread about Reading from this summer.

There are loads of similar threads on MN, it's a common concern! I made mine wait until they were 17, as it was a very long way from home and I wanted them and their friends to be a bit more mature. They grumbled at the time but had a brilliant time when they got there.

Both Reading and Leeds have very high number of those who have just finished gcses. It is the thing to do. Let him go. He will be fine.

I wouldn’t have let any of mine go at 16.
I know people who let their 16 year olds go and were under the impression they had jolly japes camping, listening to bands and a few beers.

They actually spent most of the time high as kites on mdma/acid.

I think it’s good to let teens have fun times but I think all that is too much at 16

Talk to him about drugs. And safe sex. And what to do in case a friend drinks too much etc etc. And then let him go.

He is 16. He needs to learn to stand on his own two legs, really. He might move out in the next year or two. Start giving him some room to explore and mature.

i did. Like yourself I was concerned but she was fine. She has now been several times since including this year when she said she felt a bit old (she’s 23!!!)

Yes. I wouldn't hesitate to 'let' my DC go at that age.
You really need to cut the apron strings, otherwise DS will end up resenting you.