Do you lock your door when you’re in the house?

[patienceandprudence]

Inspired by another thread (no prizes for guessing which).

I was surprised that people lock their doors sheen inside the house. Granted, we live in a small house, but it’s in a ‘bad’ area. We never lock our door when someone’s in, except at night if someone remembers. I’d say we leave it unlocked while out a good 30% of the time so if the kids come back or someone drops by to visit they don’t have to wait outside.

In my area this is the norm, and most of the time if you knock you’ll just be called in and told to walk right in next time. We tell anyone the same, even the regular delivery-people know that they can open the door and put the parcel in if it’s open.

Door always locked when in the house ..

Yeah I'm just saying, people saying they're baffled or just can't understand why people wouldn't lock it - everyone has different circumstances and everyone judges their own risk.

This is something you see a lot on MN- the absolute refusal to realise that other people might just be different. Although often "I just don't understand..." really means "I really want to sneer at...", obviously.

The annual threads about "Just not understanding..." difference about what to call Santa, how to celebrate/not celebrate Hallowe'en etc are a particular treat! I used to think it was only my father who got irrationally worked up about anyone not toeing the line (ie not doing exactly what he always does), but it seems not.

@WhereIsMumHiding3

Yeah I'm just saying, people saying they're baffled or just can't understand why people wouldn't lock it - everyone has different circumstances and everyone judges their own risk.

Yeah, I think people are more baffled by those leaving accessible doors unlocked for long periods when they wouldn't hear an intruder if they let themselves in whilst family was elsewhere in the house.

Each is different circumstances how easy a house is to access , but this thread came out of comments in another thread where minority of PPs were outraged an OP dates to lock her front door directly onto street in high crime area having been burgled before. As her DP was angry as he'd not taken keys and she'd not answered the door immediately as was mid poop on toilet .

Whilst that was a different scenario OP here has asked a great (but different) question, how many people would generally leave their front doors unlocked for long periods of time. It's really interesting to read other people's perceptions of risk and how they work it out.

So basically mumsnetters overreacting to extremes instead of acknowledging that most people behave somewhere in the middle of a spectrum. Nothing new here then!

So basically mumsnetters overreacting to extremes instead of acknowledging that most people behave somewhere in the middle of a spectrum. Nothing new here then!

I don't MNers are at all. You misinterpret other peoples thinking

This is AIBU and it's a fairly reasoned debate on this thread about the topic . PP are entitled to their own views but the thread was posted by OP for discussion, and it's not unreasonable for those security conscious to point out, without circumstances like "you have to climb over electric gates and bypass guard dog, to get to my unlocked door" that it may invalidate your house insurance and how some of the "it won't happen to me" might be a naive fallacy . No one thinks it will happen to them until it does.

I don't think anyone is being rude or dismissive of difference, the strongest term I think I've read on here is it's unwise to leave doors unsecured/ unlocked if accessible and unwatched, and reasons why were explained

Good Lord! I can't imagine not locking my door, and I live in a safe area and the residential complex has a security guard.

I've watched way too many crime documentaries not to take my safety seriously!

I did when I lived in a flat. We've moved now and I still do sometimes but I don't really know the area yet. The previous owners son said he struggled to find the front door key when his dad died because the door was never locked.

Good Lord! I can't imagine not locking my door, and I live in a safe area and the residential complex has a security guard

If where you live needs a security guard, it sounds like it maybe isn't all that safe.

Always lock my front door especially when it's just me and DS in the house.
We've been broken into twice before, albeit different house but in the same area. Not worth the risk IMO

that it may invalidate your house insurance and how some of the "it won't happen to me" might be a naive fallacy . No one thinks it will happen to them until it does.

Actually, I think plenty of people think it will happen to them and their fear of crime greatly overestimates the actual risk of being a victim of crime.
I don't lock my door if I'm downstairs at home. And actually, even if I am being naive, I would rather go though my life not worrying about being burgled or robbed than troubling myself with these worries. I think most people in the world are good and kind and trustworthy, I'm fifty and am constantly proven correct in this belief.

We live in a quiet rural/coastal location and never look our doors except when the grandchildren are staying over because I would feel dreadful if the mad axe murderer came when they were here!

Nah, we’ve been broken into via a ground floor window when I was in the shower. I got out when I heard them and screamed like a banshee for them to “get the fuck out of my house”. Which they did in fairness.

In another place I lived (a “nice” area) someone just walked into a neighbors house and took their handbag

I always lock the doors when I'm in. My doors don't automatically lock so I have to physically do it with a key. Two reasons, the first being I have a 4 year old and whilst she knows not to go outside without me and thus far has made no escape attempts, I feel it's safer to actively prevent it. The second being that a lot of time it's me in the house by myself, I feel safer knowing the door is locked and someone can't just walk in. This is a throwback to when I lived alone and it was drummed into me by my parents to lock the door behind me. It's force of habit now and just seems sensible. I also remove the key from the lock as there have been reports in my area of people trying doors and feeling through letterboxes for keys. I'd much rather be safe than sorry.

actually, even if I am being naive, I would rather go though my life not worrying about being burgled or robbed than troubling myself with these worries. I think most people in the world are good and kind and trustworthy, I'm fifty and am constantly proven correct in this belief.

Well I haven't been robbed and am of a good age. I lock my doors (& It'd invalidate my insurance if I didn't and tried to claim for a theft)

I'm not naive enough to think if I'm at back of my house cooking or in the loo, and my front door is unlocked an opportunistic burglar (who's pretending to deliver leaflets) will think "she's too nice to rob and she's 50 let's skip her house" and won't slip through my unlocked door and take my car keys, laptop and handbag

I don't expect it will happen but I'm sensible enough to know it could happen because it does to other people in their houses in spates, even in our low crime area.

You can think well of people in general all you like, but all are individuals, so some do steal, even if most people don't.

Ofc if that's how you prefer to live without any worry or troubling yourself, that's absolutely your call. It doesn't follow that it makes it a wise approach - but at 50 no one says you have to always be wise or security conscious, anymore than you have to be at any age. It's just us middle aged ppl don't really have the excuse of being naive to the fact crime does occur and can happen in 15 seconds.

I used to have a recurring dream about being trapped in a burning house, and ever since then I've found it very difficult to sleep in a house with locked doors.

My front door locks automatically when you shut it, but you only have to turn the handle to unlock it from the inside (unless it's double locked). My back door is never locked if I'm in the house.

I'd rather be burgled than burned!

Should perhaps have added that I live in a very low crime area. The last burglary round my way was in the early 90s.

Never locked except at night. Just never have. I suppose really we should start, but it'll be a long process for the six people in this house, none of whom take house keys out with them!

I live in a very posh and safe area. Someone walked into my neighbours house via the unlocked back door and took his car keys, then drove away in his car.

We lock up during the day and as someone says above everyone (and their insurance policies - vital point to check) is different. We have a big house so would not necessarily hear as well if someone came in as it is 5000 sq feet or so compared with a small house for a start.

Our front door automatically locks when you close it. Even if it didn't I would lock it for safety as it opens on to the pavement. It unlocks by just turning 2 knobs/ handles so no key needed to unlock it. The back door is usually locked unless we are going in and out of the garden.

Larkie that's a fair enough point.

I keep my house keys downstairs in same place for everyone to use in event of a fire but they're not reachable (even with a hook on a pole) through the letter box. And people are let in and let out of our house so their being missing is noticed quickly.

If DCs move my keys & don't put them back I give the "if we had a fire how would we get out if we can't find keys" speech. My DCs say "we'd climb out window and throw you out if it mum" I'm disabled my days of climbing out windows are long gone!
Still it does remind them why.
I guess I know more people who've been burgled than had house fires but I wouldn't risk either, so totally understand your perspective.

Front door always locked unless I am back and forth to the car - its a main road, not worried about theft but kids tend to knock and joke in our area - I worry about them yanking the handle and setting my dog loose.

Back door - only at night or if i am in the shower. In fact the door is open most of the day whilst I work, in the evening I just shut it until bed time.

@WhereIsMumHiding3, when I had a dog and my late partner was alive, we had a fire exit plan in case a fire broke out in the hall.

It involved DP climbing out of the bedroom window onto the roof of the bay window below, while I crammed the dog into the duvet cover. Then DP would lower himself down into the front garden, I would lower the dog down to him and then get out myself.

It just made me feel better to know we had a plan.

It depends on where you live.

We don’t lock the Side kitchen door but front door is always locked. Everyone we know uses our side door. I lock it if I am having a shower. We don’t loc k it if we are in the garden either. We are rural, last robbery in the village was a quad bike about 5 years ago.
Where my sister lived for 12 years they never locked the door and they left the keys in the car. If the car was missing it was” Someone must have borrowed it.” I won’t say where it is but a small village and no one locked their cars or houses.

I always had the door locked when I was home alone with the children and kept locking it when I was alone once everyone was out at work and school. This usually meant the chain was on but if I was feeling vulnerable I would properly lock it. Only once I forgot to take the chain off when it was a problem as dh could hear toddler DS crying and I hadn't come to let him in.

These days two dc are away and one is at school and dh is retired so he just pulls the handle up but even now if he goes out for a while I will nearly always lock it properly if I feel I need too. I pull the handle up more than anyone but thinking about it I'm not sure how much that looks the door.

Once I had a delivery guy open the door to put the parcel in and he hadn't knocked. I was not impressed and let him know.

The door is locked if I'm showering, apart from that it's open. My choice - I manage my own risk.