To feel relieved but also slightly guilty

[Ann5111]

Milestone birthday in September and I treated myself to private therapy with combination of hypnotherapy. I made sure I researched and found accredited person. I made it clear I wanted it short term and initially booked for a trial session but therapist convinced me I needed a set of sessions to see any difference. It went okay and even though I didn’t feel any real difference tbh it was nice to chat to someone.

Last week the sessions finished and I thanked her and said I won’t be doing anymore as I’m not working yet (maternity) so I can’t really afford it. It was ridiculous amounts of money which I couldn’t really continue for another 6 weeks. It was £85 a session! I know!

It’s been playing on my mind since last week that I feel a little guilty as when I told therapist she went really quiet and seemed annoyed with me, I could hear from her voice she was really pissed off! She tried to convince me by saying we’re making progress. But on the other hand I’m relieved and glad I took the decision to stop as I’m bloody overdrawn and I can’t have this luxury of just spending that ridiculous amount of money on something which I don’t really feel made much impact apart from as I said someone to talk to. But I suppose I could do that for free on MN or talk to a friend.

Why am I feeling a mix of guilt and relief? I’m a little surprised/annoyed as I would have expected the therapist to be a little more professional about me wanting to end the sessions after the agreed period. A part of me thinks she thought I would just continue and she would make money from me!

She was unprofessional, as you say. Don't worry about it.

Thank you @Nondescriptname

What was the hypnotherapy for?

It may be that they were just surprised you stopped earlier than expected, a lot of people who provide alternative therapies genuinely believe they will help, it isn't always about money.

I'll be honest - I don't understand why you'd have expensive therapy if it meant going overdrawn!

She's annoyed the hypnotherapy she performed on you didn't work, so you won't be paying her even more money just to chat!!
You obviously have a baby at home who is much more needy of your money & time, and who would absolutely love to hear you talk even if it's just nonsense or about whatever chores you're doing!
Joining mother & baby groups will be so much cheaper and you'll probably make some lovely new friends, too!
And, yes, you can chat away to us on here, too.

@GrandmaAli thank you! Yes you’re right

Ann5111

Oh thank you. It is nice to be right once in awhile!
xx

Don't feel guilty, she is a bit unprofessional if she can't hide irritation or tries to pressure people to hire her for more than they can afford.

Don’t feel guilty. I had hypnotherapy for about 8 weeks a few years ago at £120 a session and it did absolutely nothing.

My therapist was similar in not understanding why I wanted to stop and still trying to sell me an extra recording to take away with me. I felt a bit guilty at the time but I’m glad I didn’t waste another penny on something that useless!

Do not feel guilty@Ann5111. You were very clear as to what you wanted. Your therapist was a dick not to listen.

Was she ok otherwise?

She was unprofessional. It's okay to feel disappointed if a client decides not to continue but it's NOT okay to show them you are pissed off.

On the flip side, well done OP for standing your ground, saying 'no' and not loosing your cool.

Good luck

I’m in this line of work and there is absolutely no reason for you to feel guilty. Your therapist didn’t handle that too well. I’ve had a similar experience - as I walked out the door she said ‘it’s a shame because you could have done so much more’. But I was done. At that moment I’d done enough. I had gone for a reason - to talk about stuff and how it had affected me - and I’d come away with that.

Therapists should always respect their clients right to chose. It can be risky not to and to leave you with doubt wasn’t ok. Please don’t let this put you off talking therapies in the future - most well trained and well supervised therapists would handle that differently.

‘Accredited’ by which organisations?

There's no need to feel guilty, and it sounds very much like it was the right decision for you.

I have 2 friends who are counsellors/psychotherapists and both have lost a couple of clients recently. They think that people are starting to struggle financially and that the counselling is the first thing to go when money is tight, so they accept that this is the reality of being self-employed in difficult economic times.

I've had hypnotherapy twice with different teraposts and for different anounts of time. They've never tried to convince me to stay, always had a chat at end of session as to whether i wanted a further session and never any pressure, They've waved me off and wished me well! It works well for me, i think the max sessions I've had for any one thing/therapist is 3.