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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Sharing an iPad

12 replies

sisteract21 · 18/10/2021 18:49

Ok this is quite lighthearted but also not!

So my parents had an ipad between them that they shared, dad bought HALF of it as a gift for mums birthday and also as an investment for him - don't ask, it's how they do things that's not even the AIBU part

A few years later he buys mum her very own ipad all for herself. I assumed the shared ipad would then become dads but several years down the line he is insistent that it is not and is still shared.

He has his own account set up on it so messages, emails, Facebook etc all comes through the shared ipad. He is constantly moaning that she sees his messages on the shared ipad and I can't send him messages asking about Xmas presents etc as she will see them

Now call me unreasonable but would the shared ipad not just become dads?? I know half of it was a gift but if I was gifted an entire brand new ipad to myself I'd be very grateful and handover any shares of the old one so we could have one each?!

I have 'suggested' he take his account off it as it's shared but he's just removed Facebook from it as she kept reading his messages and it was about a surprise party he was organising for her. Other messages and notifications come up on it as does his Google searches/history/pages and he's not that computer literate to sort it all out and make private or delete - but imo I don't think he should have to!

It really only becomes an issue at Xmas when he's trying to get her surprises. His heart is truly in the right place god love him

OP posts:
forrestgreen · 18/10/2021 19:01

Yep. Bonkers.
Does he need mum's 'permission' to own it?

TinySaltLick · 18/10/2021 19:04

Surely ask the mum to donate back her half, she is the one who can unlock this with one gesture

imnotacelebritygetmeoutofhere · 18/10/2021 19:06

Why don't you (or you and whoever else together) buy him his own iPad for Christmas Smile

sisteract21 · 18/10/2021 19:16

@imnotacelebritygetmeoutofhere

Why don't you (or you and whoever else together) buy him his own iPad for Christmas Smile
Nice idea and as much as I would love to just to see their faces it's a very expensive present and not many of us to share the cost
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sisteract21 · 18/10/2021 19:18

@forrestgreen

Yep. Bonkers. Does he need mum's 'permission' to own it?
He just can't get past the fact that he bought half of it as a gift and wouldn't dare claim it all.

Mum on the other hand should be saying no that's yours but I think she likes that one as it's bigger so uses that for online shopping and her own smaller one for bed - absolutely ridiculous in my book and so selfish.

She actually took the right huff when he deactivated his Facebook from it as she liked to nosey on his as she doesn't have a Fb account. I was proud/surprised/amazed when he had deleted it!

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imnotacelebritygetmeoutofhere · 18/10/2021 19:31

@sisteract21 IPads are expensive, yes, but I got myself an Amazon tablet. It does all the same things but was significantly cheaper! Maybe that's an option as a gift for your dad?
(I still call my tablet "the iPad")

sisteract21 · 18/10/2021 19:35

@imnotacelebritygetmeoutofhere a good idea but they do like their Apple products and I don't think there is any need for them to have 3 tablets between 2 of them having one each seems more than enough to me!

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sisteract21 · 18/10/2021 19:36

Or rather 1.5 to mum and 0.5 to dad 🙈

OP posts:
forrestgreen · 19/10/2021 09:46

Ask mum to claim the bigger one then?

sisteract21 · 19/10/2021 14:58

It's not really something I'm getting involved in, it's up to them how they split them but I posted to find out other peoples opinion on this as I think it is bizarre!!

She won't claim the big one anyway as she likes the wee one for most things and dad bought that wholly for her so would never accept it. Like I said, bizarre!

OP posts:
BeastOfBODMAS · 19/10/2021 15:02

Presumably they have an Apple ID each so he just needs to log out of the shared device between sessions so she can’t see his stuff and has to login as herself.

sisteract21 · 20/10/2021 15:03

@BeastOfBODMAS

Presumably they have an Apple ID each so he just needs to log out of the shared device between sessions so she can’t see his stuff and has to login as herself.
Good and logical idea but they are hopeless that way! I have a their passwords as they forget them and they are constantly changing them without telling me as they get hacked or think they are being hacked. They are a bit gullible. They probably shouldn't have an online presence 🤣
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