To ask you to help me work this out?

[Lulu2021]

My head is a mess as I'm going through some relationship difficulties with a young baby and I'm trying to make sense of my entitlement to financial help.

I've done a UC calculation a few times but it comes out with an amount that i think is an overestimate.

My details are;

• FT salary of £47,126, net monthly income £2,516 after deductions.
• 2 DC (ages 15 years and 6 months) - no childcare costs for eldest, costs of £700 pm for youngest when I go back to work from mat leave.
• child maintenance of £120 pm for the eldest child only.
• private rented property
• no other benefits claimed
• no significant savings

It's telling me I'd be entitled to in the region of £650 pm as a single parent. Does this sound right? Any help would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.

@lynntheyresexpeople

The online calculator must have glitched - you're not entitled to anything on that salary. Tbh if you're struggling on that Income, I'd suggest a budgeting plan.

So the people who have helped me on this thread who work for UC who've given me an estimate of £280 a month after I've PMd them further details - they're wrong, are they? 🤔

@lynntheyresexpeople

Yes a budgeting plan - silly me. Why didn't I think of that? Oh perhaps because my life has just very recently gone to shit and I have joint expenses with a partner who will leave me with all of it, and a baby planned jointly for whom I now will have to fund all of the childcare while I work!! Sorry .... the budgeting plan went by the wayside somewhere in dealing with all that.

🙄

Please rtft.

@lynntheyresexpeople no it hasn't, and yes she is.
And cut out the catty comments. It isn't needed.

I can earn (single mum of 3, one on HRC DLA) over 60k before any entitlement would end.

Do you know something though? I'd have much much much rather of had a husband and non disabled child. I'd have rather not raised my 3rd child alone from the off, and had to pay a Nanny just so I could still go out to work in my career. Yet there are a load of envious people on here, who seem to actively want to be in this situation, just so that they too can be "entitled". I mean, come on... this way of thinking is insane. Be grateful you are not in the shit, like OP, myself and countless others have found themselves.
I mean, we are literally talking about taking money away that is intended to support children. People want the mother and children to suffer, rather than the state helping at a time of need. I know there are countries out there that like that philosophy. Thank goodness we don't live in one of them....

[quote ThisMustBeMyDream]@lynntheyresexpeople no it hasn't, and yes she is.
And cut out the catty comments. It isn't needed.

I can earn (single mum of 3, one on HRC DLA) over 60k before any entitlement would end.

Do you know something though? I'd have much much much rather of had a husband and non disabled child. I'd have rather not raised my 3rd child alone from the off, and had to pay a Nanny just so I could still go out to work in my career. Yet there are a load of envious people on here, who seem to actively want to be in this situation, just so that they too can be "entitled". I mean, come on... this way of thinking is insane. Be grateful you are not in the shit, like OP, myself and countless others have found themselves.
I mean, we are literally talking about taking money away that is intended to support children. People want the mother and children to suffer, rather than the state helping at a time of need. I know there are countries out there that like that philosophy. Thank goodness we don't live in one of them....[/quote]
You've got no idea what my personal situation is - but I can tell you it's no bloody walk in the park either. Hilarious you describe me as catty, with what you've just spouted.

@lynntheyresexpeople Telling a woman she isn't entitled to money to support her is dreadful. It isn't true at all. Then telling her to do a budget is wholly unhelpful. You came with zero facts, and an finished off with an unhelpful kick in the teeth. Catty was being polite.

Before people continue to make comments about my inability to budget / I shouldn't be struggling on my salary etc etc ....

I'll say it once more in the hope it's actually read and understood.

My partner and I took out joint finance agreements during the course of our relationship for household and baby related items. We agreed to be jointly financially liable for these at the time. He has always contributed half of the household bills along with half of the jointly purchased items each month. However, all of the agreements are solely in my name due to his poor credit rating (which he attributes to debt following a messy divorce). Therefore, when I'm single, these will be my sole financial responsibility. Added to this, we jointly planned a baby knowing the projected childcare costs and agreeing to be jointly responsible or these. When I'm single, I'll be paying these by myself (unless he makes a measly CMS contribution - of which I have no guarantee).

I hope this prevents anymore comments about budgeting and living within my means and "cutting my cloth" and god knows what else ... it's becoming tedious. At an already very stressful time.

As an example - our bed is worth well over 2 grand. I didn't even want such an expensive bed at the time! He wanted it, he agreed to pay half the monthly payment etc etc ... which he has. But when he leaves, I'll be paying for it alone. He won't pay - why would he? It'll be in my home and legally in my name. I would never have chosen a bed of anywhere near that cost on my salary alone! That's just one example.

@Lulu2021 you've had a few useful posters with actual facts (and a fucktonne of made up shit). I can do UC calculations, it's reasonably easy once you know what to do. The only thing I wanted to draw to your attention, which may not have done elsewhere, when your eldest finishes school, if she doesn't go on to do a college course at level 2 or 3, then your entitlement will probably end as her portion of the element will go. Just bear it in mind for your future planning. If she goes on to do an apprenticeship for example, it will end. If she does a levels, btec level 3 or those type of courses, she will still have her element included.

@drpaddington @Babyroobs I don't understand it at all, I've never claimed any benefits before and haven't got a clue 🙈 Neither of us get income from a pension (only pay into them), I'm not on MA, we get no carers allowances, etc.

I work part time, 18.5 hours pw and my partner works 40 hours. We only have our wages coming in, childcare fees for 2 children and a mortgage. It's been £0 every month since July when I put a claim in due to an online calculator saying that we might be entitled to a little help. Who knows 🤷🏻‍♀️

@Lulu2021 ignore the people criticising you for needing assistance for a sudden, unexpected change to your financial situation. If more people were like you and continued to work instead of opting to go on benefits as their wage only just covers child care, so they may as well stay at home, more taxes would be going to the central coffers. It's amazing how the lifestyle choice of stopping work and going on benefits is so acceptable on this site but when someone needs assistance to stay in work, you're attacked for taking from those more in need and told to reconsider your lifestyle. Utterly ridiculous. Continuing to work will place much less burden on the central funds as, even though you're getting benefits, you're still paying taxes. Yes, you may temporarily come back to a nil sum game (not looking likely on your recent post) but a nil sum game is still better than a negative one.

To quote a saying that was used above, I would think your cloth was cut to meet your means - well, before being placed in the position of the cat destroying half of it. Now you have to salvage what you can without, as you rightly noted, impacting your future by damaging your credit rating. A bad credit rating can impact your ability to rent, social housing isn't easy to come by, what happens then?

You're entitled to support. Do not feel bad by asking for it.

The pension you’re paying is less than 9.3%…

That's how it was explained to me in the journal. We ended up staying on tax free childcare though as it looks like we wouldn't have gained anything by swapping over after being told this.

Sorry for piggybacking the thread OP 🙈

My partner and I took out joint finance agreements during the course of our relationship for household and baby related items.

In the nicest possible way, yes it was a joint decision but now you are single so you’re going to have to make it work.
That might mean budgeting or if you can’t do that finding some other way to afford the repayments - maybe you could phone them up and explain and ask the payments be spread across a longer period or exchange the items for cheaper products etc.

I think most people who are telling you you need to budget are genuinely just trying to help you.
UC will only help so much, the rest you will have to ask on MN and we’ll try and give you as much advice as we can :)

Hope you can sort it all out without having to give up your job. The average full time wage in the U.K. at the mo is about 32k so that is possible why some commentators are suggesting you might find it hard to get much UC. Remember you can make an appointment with citizens advice to go through the process with you and check you are doing it right. As far as I can tell, the system doesn’t work as many women say they can’t afford to pay for childcare on UC so work doesn’t necessarily pay. Hope it all works out.

Based on my limited legal knowledge from watching Judge Rinder if you can prove that he was making regular payments for his half of the financed furniture then it proves you had an agreement that he was responsible for half even if not in his name. Not sure how long it would take to take the legal route though.

@Boobahs

You are still missing the point that the rent makes a lot of difference, I only get the 700 to 1000, that I get because I rent, before now I have worked out that if I don't rent I wouldn't get anything either and that is on 21k a year, but because I rent it adds an extra 952 per month to my threshold - the thresholds massively drop for non renters.

Doesn’t your partner pay for his other child, albeit not at CMS rates? At least that would be something extra and CMS doesn’t count for benefit calculations.

I’m so sorry you’re in this situation. I hope you can get CMS to make him pay the correct amount. Wishing you all the best

@Hugoslavia

You don't have to explain where the child of your father is it's non of anyone's business... bloody cheek.

I completely disagree. I don't think that it's unreasonable for people to ask what contribution the kids father's are making. And despite the fact that the youngest's father avoided paying out for the first one doesn't mean that he'll be able to avoid the second one. So it is entirely reasonable to expect the OP to lodge a claim for child support before turning to the tax payer and getting them to foot the bill for another man's child.

OK so you wouldn't say that IRL would you? OP did not drip feed. There is such thing as awareness OP obviously isn't a silly person.

Most mothers are not or did you think people who are single parents are just not claiming CMS when it's possible? You clearly don't know how useless CMS can be.

Also there's a debate on CMS currently. CMS would help
but unless OP is getting an extraordinary amount of £££ like £1000 she would still need government assistance. Some people have actually been quite rude to OP. But the again we we are in MN land where someone will start to come along and say they £4000 per month in CM. Good for you that isn't an average amount though.

Ohh AND the reason why CMS doesn't affect your benefits IS because CMS can be unreliable or the paying party can decide to fiddle their earnings.

[quote Musereader]@Boobahs

You are still missing the point that the rent makes a lot of difference, I only get the 700 to 1000, that I get because I rent, before now I have worked out that if I don't rent I wouldn't get anything either and that is on 21k a year, but because I rent it adds an extra 952 per month to my threshold - the thresholds massively drop for non renters.[/quote]
I'm not missing the point at all. That's what she will be entitled to, and that's what they've said to me? I'm not moaning that OP can claim, just stating that I can't 🤷🏻‍♀️

Most families" might not have studied and worked their arse off for over a decade to be professionally where they are, making multiple sacrifices along the way.

Many, many families have done exactly this.

@Bigeggsinapackoften

Doesn’t your partner pay for his other child, albeit not at CMS rates? At least that would be something extra and CMS doesn’t count for benefit calculations.

Yes he does. But he made this figure up to suit himself. Which is my point. Who's to say he won't do that to me. I've got absolutely not guarantees. He could also take it away at any point if he did pay anything. So I think it's sensible to come from a starting point of expecting nothing to very little.

But you know how much he pays for his other child don’t you? And he does pay that? Or is he sketchy with paying?

I’m not sure I’ve got this straight, but

You have wage slips showing his earnings

He should be paying maintenance to the other child’s mother - but she gets a bill payment letter?

Send in the pay slips, stating it’s odd when his wage slips show he is earning - that letters for nil payment from them are being sent

If I’ve got the scene correct

This would open up payment for you later

So it is entirely reasonable to expect the OP to lodge a claim for child support before turning to the tax payer and getting them to foot the bill for another man's child.

Is this for real?

Even if he paid me hundreds in child support, I'm being told I would still have the same entitlement to UC! So this point is ridiculous.

Secondly. "The tax payer" includes me - monthly I pay over £500 in tax on my salary. I'd be entitled to a few hundred less than this in UC. Therefore if we're being picky about it, I'm still putting far more into the public purse than I'd be getting back. So by your logic, you could look at it like this - my contribution to supporting all the other families who claim UC would be temporarily reduced for a few years.

By the way - in 4 years time I am due a pay rise and my salary will increase to £53,000. Childcare fees won't be an issue for by this point, obviously. At this point I'll be removing precisely zero from the public purse, and adding back to the purse in the region of £700 pm in tax deductions.

But yes - please continue to begrudge me a chance of keeping myself and my family afloat single handedly for a few years.