Do you ever get it back?

[Whipittilitpeaks]

A bit of your old life before kids/the way you felt?

Dd, 3, means everything to us, but I miss our old life sometimes, being able to sit and talk, getting drunk and lying in bed/ on the sofa all day, waking up at 10 am etc etc

When kids leave home, do you go back to it, or have things changed completely by then?

Yes you do! Ours are 22 and 19, oldest living his best life in a city having graduated and landed a fab job, youngest on a path to a job that will (should) change her life. We have the freedom to do all the things you mention but we also have new things that we want to do, things that we didn't know we wanted to do when the kids were little!

I love them both with that same fierceness that I did when they were small but I also have a real appetite for what comes next for me and DH. I honestly hear you and your life is still there!

Yep.
15 and 17 here- and DH and I have just discussed weekend plans that sound very similar to weekend plans 20 years ago!
Not quite the same of course, but you definitely get a bit back.

Yeah. Once they’re a bit older and can entertain themselves in the mornings with some kids TV etc you can have a lie in. I used to leave some juice boxes and a pack or brioche buns in the sitting room on weekends so that my little ones wouldn’t wake me up

And once they’re 10-12 yo you can go out as a couple for a meal and leave them with a friend and a pizza. Mine are all teens and I’m finally feeling like I can get my life back as they can make themselves food if I’m out for the evening etc so I can properly switch off. It feels a long way off for you right now, but it will come (and then you’ll miss the toddler snuggles and cuteness!)

I was talking about this with my auntie the other day. Her eldest had moved out, good job. Her youngest is still at home but just started on a good career path in a big company. I was saying how much I love DS (15 months) but sometimes I just miss having lazy days and knowing my evenings are mine without running back to the bedroom 2-4 times when he wakes. She told me by the time they get older and leave, you get that time back but don't really want it back cause you miss the kids 😅 it's typical but I can understand what she means. I'm sure not everyone will feel like this, I guess it just depends