New job is making me stand in front of the entire department and say a 'fun fact' about myself - AIBU?

[thisisnotforme]

I started a new job recently, I've mainly been working remotely so have only met a handful of colleagues.

There is a big departmental in-person meeting next week, I am already dreading going to it because I'm really nervous to meet people in real life, even though I have been speaking to them on Teams I'm still nervous.

Today I got an email that they are going to use that meeting to introduce me to the team and they want to stand up in front of everyone and say a fun fact about myself.

I'm really shy and this is literally my worst nightmare.

Go for very mundane stuff. Say you wish you could claim to be a top performing Shirley bassey impersonator but your fun fact is actually that you like tomato ketchup on curry and you’re reading xxxx book, which your totally addicted to. And can’t put down at night.

I went to something once and a woman's fun fact was her boyfriend was killed by lightning. Everyone was just shocked.

@montysma1

No you don't. Doing random pish with no relevance does not make you better at your job. It's just crap devised by HR people with time on their hands.

I agree. It's pointless and just causes anxiety unnecessarily. I've been in the workplace for nearly 40 years. I'm absolutely fine about giving presentations, etc., when actually required, i.e. factual presentations about relevant subject matter. But these "fun" introductions are cringeworthy - no one likes them, no one cares, no one remembers your name when so many people are doing them at once.

When I was a lot younger, I would be stressed and on edge whenever I was sent on a course or an "introduction" session - I wasn't stressed about the subject matter, it was also the knowing/not knowing if they were doing some stupid "get to know you" activities. It completely ruined the session for me as I would be too stressed to listen properly to people before me, and then after my "turn", I'd take a while to destress. If I was doing a proper presentation, I was never stressed as I'd just "do it", well within my comfort zone.

It's not as if I have a problem standing in front of people. I taught at the local college of FE for a few years (accounting). We were told to do lots of "ice breaking" sessions for new cohorts, but I simply refused to put them through it and would start the course as a normal lesson, jump straight into the subject matter. My students didn't have any problems "blending" in other ways.

Stupid ice breaking sessions are definitely created by extroverts for extroverts to give them a chance to show off how super-confident they are and give them a "look at me" platform. But, no one cares!

Fun fact : I hate doing shit like this

“Hi, I’m Sarah, I hate talking about myself and the people who make me do so all die within 2 weeks of me doing so.”

Another thing is that now I have my own business (for last 20 years), I get to choose which training courses we do, which providers we use. Any that do these stupid ice breaker sessions don't get any repeat business from me.

It took a while, but I've now got a couple of training providers that don't pull silly stunts - they just have a "pre session" networking session over tea/coffee/croissants etc for the socially minded people to do their thing, but then go straight into the subject matter of the course.

@rrhuth

Nothing grows in the comfort zone Oh for goodness' sake, what kind of horror is this phrase?

I don't want to grow, I want a cup of tea and a sit down.

I thought the same @rrhuth, but hoped it was being typed tongue in cheek.

I don't suppose my having met Jimmy Saville would count as a fun fact, would it?

I’d hate this, just pick a fact. I wouldn’t make it up unless it’s about something that can’t be asked about - when I grew up I had an imaginary friend called Bob is OK

• my favourite singer is Adele could mean someone asks you in future or secret Santa Adele stuff forever

PP saying that no one else is being asked for a fact are correct for this meeting, but presumably had to do it when they joined.

Being able to say at least a bit publicly including non work related can be needed even if your main job doesn’t include speaking in public at all. It could come up as an ice breaker before meeting with new client so probably worth coming up with a stock phrase.

@mathanxiety

I am suspecting that a lot of people on here don’t work if the idea of something so basic seems difficult. It’s literally one sentence.

Or even school life. This is routine stuff.

I think many of us are perfectly capable of communicating with others without the forced fun aspect of it. I took an evening class once where the first half of the first lesson (so over an hour) was some daft ice breaking exercise. We'd all been doing our own ice breaking in the minutes before the class so it was totally unnecessary. And then, the tutor had to spent the entire 3 term course trying to get us to shut up. I think she did her ice breaking a little too well !

I tend to assume people are expected to bond over their shared terror in these minor public speaking tasks.
Personally I don't mind them except when they are sprung on me at the last minute, when my mind goes completely blank and I struggle to remember my own name.
I do think it's sad that the hoops people are made to jump through in group interviews (had to do one to do a part time job in a supermarket once) weed out the competent but quiet ones very nicely. They end up with the ones who are so desperate to get a job that they will do anything to get it (and potentially those same people will suck up poor treatment once they've got the job too)

Loads of this stuff at my work - really dislike it!

I’d prepare the ‘fun fact’ but unless the person introducing me actually used those words on the day (!) would instead just introduce myself in a factual and friendly way, eg ‘I’m dozer, I’ve joined team blah to do blah, before that i was doing blah and am really pleased to be here and meet you all in person’. And not say the ‘fun fact’

As someone who has trouble with social interactions and also names and faces I'd much rather have something structured like this as a way of learning who my fellow workers are than mingle in an unstructured spontaneous way over coffee or be forced to skulk in the corner being a visible loner. And an idiotic fact at least gives you something to say when you end up sitting next to them at lunch. "Loved your tenuous claim to fame - do you think you could get to The Queen in six links or less" "I've got cats too, what breed are yours"

(A reason why "I've never seen" is a rubbish fun fact by the way - as a conversation starter it's much more challenging).

"fun fact about me: I'm shy." then sit down.

@mathanxiety

I am suspecting that a lot of people on here don’t work if the idea of something so basic seems difficult. It’s literally one sentence.

Or even school life. This is routine stuff.

This is really patronising tbh.

I got on great at school, and get on great at work - but can still see this for the absolute bollocks of this type of performance.

It isn't something serious and respected people are asked to do.
I think it says a lot about people who don't see how demeaning it is - if your boss asks you to do this stuff, they don't respect you or your work.

I agree it is widespread - but that is because lack of respect for workers is quite widespread.

@Badbadbunny

Another thing is that now I have my own business (for last 20 years), I get to choose which training courses we do, which providers we use. Any that do these stupid ice breaker sessions don't get any repeat business from me.

It took a while, but I've now got a couple of training providers that don't pull silly stunts - they just have a "pre session" networking session over tea/coffee/croissants etc for the socially minded people to do their thing, but then go straight into the subject matter of the course.

Ditto (run own business I mean)

I call it ‘beanbags and bullshit’ training. Lots of flappy hands and infantilising shite.

infantilising this is a very key word I think, it is absolutely what it is and what it is designed to do - it is designed to undermine/diminish from the outset.

It could be looked at as a form of hazing.

Another vote for "why do extroverts make everyone do this performative nonsense".

The thing that really grinds my gears is how stupid, superficial, infantilising and irrelevant it is. It doesn't enable people to bond better, it doesn't help them get to know each other, and it damn sure doesn't make anyone better at their jobs.

I absolutely loathe public speaking but obviously I can grit my teeth and offer up some bland platitude. But I don't see why I should have to go through that unpleasantness for something so pointless just so the loud extroverts can do their look-at-me routine.

It was once sprung on me at the last minute but couched in a "would you like to get up and tell everyone a fun fact" question by the insufferably perky moderator. I just replied "no thank you, I'm OK!" in a cheerful voice and then just sat there until she moved on.

@OutwiththeOutCrowd

It could be looked at as a form of hazing.

I think that’s a bit of an overreaction. I don’t love icebreakers either but it takes eight seconds and you get to pick absolutely anything of your choice to say, including making something up. It’s not like you’re being stripped naked and tied to a lamppost overnight.

In a professional environment I would find more interesting to hear how someone new got to where they were, and I would find it easier myself and therefore talk more naturally. e.g. "after uni I worked for xyz and lived in nnn for 3 years, then I moved to xxx where I learnt how to do yyy. I really enjoyed the work, but didn't like living abroad, so looked for something else"

I'd feel uncomfortable telling a bunch of people I don't know something personal about myself and if you just make it up then what's the point?

FWIW, I am pretty confident and have never had a problem getting to know colleagues but the thought of standing up in front of all those people and trying to be funny.....nope.

Agree with PPs saying this is mild. I mean, it's not like it's a team building karaoke evening or something. This is about 0.1 out of 10 on the bullshit extrovert scale.

Can you play a musical instrument? Do you have a hobby? Do you have a pet? Might not be the worst thing to be pushed out of your comfort zone for 10 seconds.

I already had to say some fun facts about me when I first started, I wasn't expecting to have to do it again

Fuck that and fuck that again.
I'd email back, 'I've done fun facts – I did it when I started.'
I'm a miserable cow though and these days work freelance, alone, in my spare room. Not only so I don't have to do this sort of shite, but it is a perk

It’s not like you’re being stripped naked and tied to a lamppost overnight.
It's not about where it is on some scale of humiliation. The nature of these things has a subtext of 'if you don't go along with it, you will be looked at differently' and that has no place in a decent workplace IMO.

@ivykaty44

Being an introvert is not the same as being shy.

Never met a shy extrovert though

meet plenty of insecure extroverts through and a couple of very confident introverts

this is true. i am a confident introvert. i don't think this exercise is to do with being one or t'other. i think it is more to do with not sweating the small stuff.

but if culturally you don't fit in an environment, it is worth moving to where where you would fit because that does make such a difference. even within the same job or profession, working with your sort of people and a culture you can buy into is so much better.

but in the meantime just get on with it, don't overthink it!