Please help - 10 year old bed wetting

[Lookingforhelp101]

I'm at my wits end with it. It has always been an issue but seems to come in waves. We can go weeks with nothing but it never seems to go away fully. Invested in a bed wetting alarm a while back. The problem with this is that it usually happens infrequently and therefore the alarm isn't getting a chance to take affect I think? As in its not having the chance to get him to automatically wake before he goes as it doesn't happen enough if that makes sense?
The other problem is that it is a constant battle to get him to wear it. I'm at the point of just giving up. But I can't because when he wets the bed it bothers him so much that he is unbearable and everyone in the house suffers.
I go between feeling awful for him and wanting to scream at him to just use the fucking alarm (I don't, I keep my patience at all times, but my God, its wearing thin).
Any advice much appreciated.

Has your son been seen by a doctor, to rule out any physical cause? There are medications that can help. My friend's granddaughter had the same thing, and she wet the bed until she was 12. Some tablets from the GP sorted it. The girl is now almost 14, doesn't wet the bed, doesn't need the tablets or anything else.

Good luck.

My nine year old is the exact same so I’m interested in any replies you get. Best of luck. It can be very stressful.

My two at 12 and 14. Have been on dessmopressin for 6 years, 14 yr old also on oxybutin. If they take their tablets they are dry. If they don't they are generally wet.

My 9 year old too. She is on desmopressin but doesn't like to take it and it doesn't seem to solve the problem either. She has a lot of accidents during the day too. I know she finds it upsetting and embarrassing and I mostly manage to stay on the right side of sympathetic and concerned, but sometimes (when washing the 5th set of sheets in a week) I get a bit, "arrrrrghhhhhhh!"

Bed wetting alarms are awful things. Please don't force him to wear it. Please see a doctor and Please be gentle with him.

Thank you Lynn. We went to the GP a couple of years ago. He recommended the alarm and referred him to urology. Still waiting for that appointment. My own GP was on maternity leave at the time so I might go back and see her.
Great to hear your friends daughter got it sorted.
Do you know what the medication was?

@Minimamame

My nine year old is the exact same so I’m interested in any replies you get. Best of luck. It can be very stressful.

Sorry to hear you are going through the same

@waitingpatientlyforspring

My two at 12 and 14. Have been on dessmopressin for 6 years, 14 yr old also on oxybutin. If they take their tablets they are dry. If they don't they are generally wet.

Thank you. Is the medication OK to take long term?

Thank you jourdain for sharing. I know the feeling, it's very frustrating.

Forensicflossy why are they awful? I had seen them recommended on here before. I really don't want to make it worse for him

My boys were still wet at 12 and 10. Desmopressin didn't work for them and they wouldn't wear the alarms that clipped to their pyjamas. We invested in the Dr Sagie Therapee alarm, which is a mat that you put under the sheet. It was expensive but so worth it - wish I had found it years ago. 12 year old was dry in a month and the 10 year old in a week. Gave it to a friend after us, and their 12 year old was also dry quickly.

Does he have a nightlight? As soon as we turned our sons nightlight off and he slept in the dark the bed wetting stopped.

@Lookingforhelp101

Thank you jourdain for sharing. I know the feeling, it's very frustrating.

Forensicflossy why are they awful? I had seen them recommended on here before. I really don't want to make it worse for him

My GP did warn against the alarms because disturbing sleep is not ideal and also it can increase anxiety (and consequently make the problem worse).

Of course if they wet the bed, sleep gets disturbed anyway

My DD drives me a bit nuts because she wets herself at school and doesn't want to say anything so she was just staying in wet clothes. I started putting spare pants in her bag and a plastic bag to store the wet ones but it's still a bit like, arghhh! Have had discreet words with the school but they're very reasonably and understandably not wanting to bring it up unnecessarily and make her embarrassed!

I've answered these threads a number of times so I'm just going to repeat.

I wet the bed till I was 14.

Honestly, leave him alone. Get a rubber sheet and just be patient. Your son feels bad enough already without some stupid alarm.

My mum tried various things: doctors, calendars, "walking" me to the loo before her bedtime. Nothing made any difference.

But she never made me feel bad.

I grew out of it eventually.

Be patient.

@ @Lookingforhelp101 My son used to wet the bed frequently and I found a couple of things helped I made sure he went to the toilet before he went to bed and a few hours later I'd wake him and take him to the loo again he'd be groggy but he would use the toilet . It won't solve the problem but I found that at least he didn't wet the bed anywhere near as much .

Two of my brothers were 14 and 15 before they had dry nights.

My son is 11 and we were offered tablets (I can’t remember the name, I’ll have a think) but he can’t swallow tablets.

Is there any trigger? Constipation can cause bed wetting. What time does he go to bed and wake up? Im sure you’ve already stopped drinks an hour before bedtime but does he definitely go to the toilet before bed?

Speak to the school nurses (better than Gp) and ask for a referral to the child continence team or bladder team.

Bed wetting can be hereditary and go away on its own. My daughter suffered till age 11. They can prescribe some desmopressin tablets which help also

@AhNowTed you have described my exact experience.

He will grow out of it.

Don't assume he'll grow out of it, every child is different.

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