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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Has anyone used a medium?

18 replies

Enterifyoudare · 13/10/2021 23:06

Shamelessly posting for traffic. I've just been watching The Long Island Medium on the telly. I know it's all staged for the telly, but it did get me wondering about what it's like to use one.

Has anyone ever used one? What was it like? Were they any good, or was it a bit Derek Acorah?

My sister passed away last year, so perhaps I'm a bit vulnerable and secretly hoping for something by even considering it.

OP posts:

SusieBob · 13/10/2021 23:09

It's all nonsense. Don't let these vultures prey on your grief.

MatildaIThink · 13/10/2021 23:13

I have not and will never use one, if you want to throw your money away then throw it away in the direction of a charity rather than a medium, which is just another name for a con artist who preys on the weak and vulnerable.

user1471517900 · 13/10/2021 23:15

I used to, but over the years I've become more of a large.

BrilloPaddy · 13/10/2021 23:16

A family friend is a firmer believer and often visits mediums. She finds great comfort in it, as she's very spiritual. My sister went with her once, and the medium told her that she had an elderly lady stood right behind her. My sister didn't remember her much as she was young when she died, but she described our paternal grandmother down to a tee, including the hat she was wearing which was like a bouquet of roses (Nan loved hats and had one that was like a floral swimming cap). It really freaked my sister out, to be honest, rather than being a comfort and she said she'd never do it again.

I had my palm read by a gypsy once, and she was uncannily accurate about my life - knew the amount of children I had, that one had died and that I was grieving for my (other) Nan. It felt like she was looking right into my soul somehow, but it was a nice feeling and not worrying. She wouldn't take any money off me at the end and gave me a crystal. Who knows.........

Original poster

Enterifyoudare · 13/10/2021 23:21

@SusieBob

It's all nonsense. Don't let these vultures prey on your grief.

I still think that. But then seeing people get some comfort from it did get to me a little.

OP posts:

Original poster

Enterifyoudare · 13/10/2021 23:24

@user1471517900

I used to, but over the years I've become more of a large.

I had to think about that for a minute.

OP posts:

bettertimesarecomingnow · 13/10/2021 23:29

Yes I have. But not a dead person contact thing.

I was going through a very dark time and she was very reassuring and everything she said made sense. She told me to run a mile from the person I sought advice about and she was right.

She also told me I would meet my husband and described him perfectly.

I can give you her details if you want to PM me

OldScrappyAndHungry · 13/10/2021 23:33

OP please don’t. The fact that it’s all bullshit is bad enough but the fact that they prey on the grieving and vulnerable just makes them reprehensible.

I’m so sorry for your loss - your money would be far better spent on grief counselling .

Offmyfence · 13/10/2021 23:35

Nope and never would!

Seren85 · 13/10/2021 23:37

I remember saying to my Mum on the day my LH died, do not let me go down that route because I will want to. Over 18 months out, it does not appeal to me at all.

TaraR2020 · 13/10/2021 23:38

I have a friend who lost their parent suddenly and they found going to a medium helped them deal with the grief. They're not woo, really, just gave them comfort.

I think like all beliefs there is a place for their roles in people's lives, for certain people at certain times. Just need to be careful a belief doesn't negatively dominate your life or others.

Billlius · 13/10/2021 23:41

I went to a medium which was part of a Rugby Club fundraising event. I refused to say a word and he got very shirty and said I had to work with him. Ie tell him things so that he could repeat them back to me as if he had some insight. He eventually said that I worked with children and computers. It was an event organised by school mums 🤔 and who doesn’t work with some form of computer tech these days ?

I think I ruined his night.

Saoirse82 · 13/10/2021 23:57

I always thought it was BS but a friend lost her dad around the same time I lost a close family member friend has always been very spiritual and she saw someone who brought her a lot of comfort so convinced me to go. I almost did it for my grieving friend but what the medium was able to tell me no-one could ever have known. It's different when someone tells you first hand things that someone couldn't possibly have ever known, things that were totally personal to me and my family member. It has definitely changed the way I look at things, I was always of a negative mindset, 'expect the worst' 'don't get your hopes up' this slowly changed over time and has had a positive impact on my life, now I'm not a skeptic and people may think I'm gullible but I know what I felt and regardless of anything else it's brought me comfort and has had a positive impact on my life altogether.

SusieBob · 13/10/2021 23:59

I can understand why these people might bring comfort, but it's a false comfort based on lies. If you truly need help please make an appointment with your gp and see an actual trained professional.

It's all tricks and lies. Anyone - literally anyone - can learn how to tell you things about yourself you think they couldn't possibly know.

ShepherdMoons · 14/10/2021 07:32

I've only been to one and it was a very generic reading. It was a bit shit.

I also once accidentally ended up at a spiritualist meeting. I thought I was going to a yoga session (new town, I'm bad at directions). I was a bit surprised when the minister started contacting the dead!!!

Needless to say it was all bunkum, very sad for the people who were grieving.

overnightangel · 14/10/2021 07:39

@bettertimesarecomingnow

Yes I have. But not a dead person contact thing.

I was going through a very dark time and she was very reassuring and everything she said made sense. She told me to run a mile from the person I sought advice about and she was right.

She also told me I would meet my husband and described him perfectly.

I can give you her details if you want to PM me

Did this not just lead you to go looking for the person she described as your future husband ? Even subconsciously?

Taxwolf · 14/10/2021 07:43

I have a friend who visited one following the sudden death of her mother. She was totally convinced by the woman who also accurately told her stuff about her marriage.

The thing is though, the ‘dead’ don’t give any revelations but (in this case) were talking about cushion covers and giving advice on a house renovation!

The so called medium didn’t charge but asked for ‘donations’.

My friend convinced me to see a tarot card reader once who was total rubbish and a charlatan. I paid by cheque, said I forgot my card, then I cancelled the cheque (this was years ago). She didn’t predict that!

Forgothowmuchlhatehomeschoolin · 14/10/2021 08:01

I have seen 3 different ones over a long period of time.
2 of them were absolutely spot on and knew stuff nobody knows - some really random things and other stuff that had only just happened. And when l booked the reading they only knew my Christian name so not like they could have looked me up on facebook etc. Both times l went, l was at a crossroads in my life and felt l needed some guidance and they did help me a bit.
The last time l went she was diabolical and all she could tell me was the first letter of my dad's name which funnily enough l already knew!
Don't feel the need to go again and couldn't think of anything worse than going to a public one ....would only ever do a private one.

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