AIBU to worry about germs and kids

[happyviolet]

I'm a new mum to a 10 week old, and although I've had therapy in the past for this - I've got a terrible germ phobia.

Today we went to a baby class that was held at a soft play centre, and I was sitting with the other mums afterwards, just thinking about the day that she can crawl/ will be old enough to want to go and play there and how I'm going to cope with it.

I'm terrified mainly of threadworm eggs being on things (which I know are common with kids) and I'm not great with anything public bathroom/toilet related.

I know I've still got time to get a grip on this before she's older, but I'm already on antidepressants and have had CBT to tackle it, and NOTHING WORKS!

AIBU to be completely grossed out by kids and germs in general, and does anyone have any advise on how to tackle this!

Do you think it's OCD? We have a lot of of OCD in our family and it very much sounds like it. It is difficult to change those thoughts. Which med are you on and what dose? It might be that it needs adjusting.

I am the exact same, it's so crippling.

Honestly OP I get it. I'm mum to a preemie and won't be going anywhere crowded. RSV/bronchiolitis is rife and lots of babies are getting very poorly. Our community nurses have said be so careful until 12 weeks (corrected for him).

You've gone to soft play during a pandemic with a child who is too young to want to go so I'm not fully feeling the germ phobia vibe.

However as your child grows you might find you relax a bit this will help

@lizkt - yes, it's definitely OCD in some form. I've struggled in the past with various other things, but this feels crippling. I'm on sertraline 50mg, and as I'm breastfeeding I've worried about upping the dose, but maybe it's needed at this point.

@whoknew23 @VividGemini- I'm sorry to hear you're struggling too. Sending love - it's so so tough.

@NoKnit - I didn't realise it was being hosted at a soft play annoyingly! I thought the class would be a covid secure one in a room somewhere, and turned up to this play centre :(

I know this is only anecdotal but I was taking children to soft play, etc. for well over 20 years and not one ever had worms or anything else similar.

If it were me I'd consider trying therapy again. Sometimes it works because it's come along at the right time for you. It can't always be forced.

Threadworms are not that common!!

Not struggling here - I think worries about germs at the moment are justified. If your worries are affecting your day to day life then seek help but it seems as though you're happy going to soft play etc.

@happyviolet Sorry to hear. Being a new mum can definitely exacerbate OCD. I'd say 50mg is lower end for sertraline. My DD is 15 years and is on 100mg. Worth chatting with the doc about the pros and cons on dosage when breastfeeding. I don't know too much about whether it changes what they'll let you have.

My DD's OCD is caused by her immune system and inflammation. Strange but true. So ibuprofen works very well when her OCD is off the charts.

CBT did absolutely nothing and her psychiatrist said it can be very hard to deal with intrusive thoughts via therapy alone.

I was the same as you OP, two children later you just have to get on with it in a sense. Kids carry all sorts of germs from nursery, parks, soft play, play dates, school. They are unavoidable and a part of life. Worms are treatable anyway.

Soft play centres are filthy grim places; kids love them but I never did. We had threadworms repeatedly when my kids were small - though more likely from someone at school than from soft play. Never nits though.
The best advice I can give on all of this is to WASH YOUR KIDS' HANDS whenever they come home from anywhere and before they eat anything. Properly, with hot water and soap, not just a baby wipe.

It's really important for kids to be exposed to germs, it strengthens their immune system, kids that grow up on farms are the healthiest kids. My ds never had threadworms and I never had them as a child either. I'm much more wary of all the chemicals people use to clean stuff than I am of germs, they are much more dangerous IMO.

I think that as long as she wasn’t prem it immunosupressed is you have to remember that you will cause more harm than good trying to avoid germs too radically. Your immune system is primed to learn between the ages of 0-5, those encounters are key. Look how rotten the colds are that are going around now our immune systems have become used to isolation. Take sensible precautions like good hand washing obviously.