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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

To go on the pill while waiting for IVF? Ridiculous right?

24 replies

AliceAbsolum · 09/10/2021 15:30

Been trying for 6 years. Never ever had a positive pregnancy test with clomid, shagging, or 2 rounds of IVF.
Donor eggs worked, but then miscarriage at 8 weeks.

We've decided for many reasons to do our next cycle in a year's time (2x frozen embryos)

I'm really struggling with painful, long, irregular periods, PMS, and spotting between periods. So I think going on the pill for a year could really help with this. But 0.0000001% of me thinks "what if a miracle happens?"

I don't really want this thread to turn into a "My friend had triplets after trying for 25 years!" but I accept that it does happen for some.

My AMH was 1, 3 years ago. I just can't see it ever happening.

Wwyd?

OP posts:

Porridgeislife · 09/10/2021 15:36

Have you ever been investigated for endometriosis? The spotting between periods / painful periods is a classic sign.

It’s probably not what you want to hear, but I had to go on the pill between rounds of IVF and it sent me bonkers, I was perpetually on the verge of tears or anger. It was far worse than I can remember pre TTC days

catsandhens · 09/10/2021 15:36

speak to the fertility clinic, in some cases birth control pills are reccomended before ivf, in other cases they are contraindicated, at least if you have the conversation you will know medically whats best?

suspiria777 · 09/10/2021 15:37

What's AMH?

KarmaStar · 09/10/2021 15:38

I've never been in your position up but I can say,to do what is best for you in the next year.it will give you time to get strong,fit and healthy.
🌈💐
Whatever happens after that will happen.I hope you get to hold your baby one day in the near future.

PurpleDaisies · 09/10/2021 15:38

It’s probably worth discussing this with your fertility clinic.

FWIW going on contraception really helped me mentally take a break from the whole infertility nightmare.

TheCheeseBadge · 09/10/2021 15:42

I agree with Purple, I think it could help mentally. Fertility treatment is so tough going (I've had 13 rounds in total, although same sex relationship so no way to try naturally), adding the roller coaster of "could I bet the person that conceives just when I stop trying" can only make it harder.

See what the clinic say, they might want you to come off the pill x months before your next round.

Newmumatlast · 09/10/2021 15:46

I had successful IVF. Had to go on pill beforehand as they needed me to have set periods to then tie in with the scans/drugs/treatment being timed. So actually no, I dont think it's silly to do this if you're in pain. Get your cycles controlled and regular and then IVF next year.

ThreeLittleDots · 09/10/2021 15:49

Get your cycles controlled and regular

I don't understand the advice you had newmum - the combined pill (and for some, the mini-pill) supresses ovulation so there are no 'cycles'

starsareblazing · 09/10/2021 15:57

I am infertile (low AMH planning on using donor eggs for our next round) and would definitely try the pill/whatever contraceptive might work to improve symptoms.

The emotional nightmare that others have spoken about every month of knowing it's never going to happen but then having that horrible tiny bit of 'but you never know...' is the worst, I can totally sympathise. I imagine it might be really empowering and emotionally freeing to take control of that feeling whilst potentially improving your symptoms and having some peace while you wait for your next round. I've thought about doing this exact thing myself for emotional reasons but our next round is (hopefully) soon so have decided to wait!

Good luck with everything and def double check with clinic when they would want you to come off contraceptives prior to cycle x

godmum56 · 09/10/2021 16:01

i'd definitey be taking medical advice on this to see if they have strong reasons one way or the other.

Roonilwazlib1 · 09/10/2021 16:02

I don't think you are being unreasonable as it sounds like it will help your mental health as well as your physical symptoms, but i would definitely speak to your fertility clinic first

Original poster

AliceAbsolum · 09/10/2021 16:13

Thanks everyone, really kind and helpful advice. It is such a roller-coaster.

I've not had proper tests for endo, just lots of scans and they find cysts (like 1 big one not pcos) On my ovary then say "we're not sure".

Clinic is in Cyprus and you can't talk to the doctor directly. So not sure about that. Why is it sometimes couterindicated?

OP posts:

Original poster

AliceAbsolum · 09/10/2021 16:14

@suspiria777

What's AMH?

Anti mullarian hormone. An indication of egg reserve. 1 is loooooow. And it reduces with age.

OP posts:

PurpleDaisies · 09/10/2021 16:16

Clinic is in Cyprus and you can't talk to the doctor directly

Can’t you drop them an email? I can’t see it being an issue but I would check anyway.

Original poster

AliceAbsolum · 09/10/2021 16:18

Yes good point. No harm asking

OP posts:

Porridgeislife · 09/10/2021 16:20

If the cyst is blood filled (chocolate cyst or endometrioma) that is a fairly definite diagnosis of endometriosis. I would ask them a few more questions about the cyst x

Original poster

AliceAbsolum · 09/10/2021 16:25

@Porridgeislife

If the cyst is blood filled (chocolate cyst or endometrioma) that is a fairly definite diagnosis of endometriosis. I would ask them a few more questions about the cyst x

Really? It was a chocolate cyst too. Not that the consultant gave a shiny shit.

How interesting. But my periods are not /that/ painful.

OP posts:

Porridgeislife · 09/10/2021 16:32

Mine weren’t really that painful either (ibruprofen was enough) but IVF revealed severe endo, enough for four and a half hour of surgery. It’s been the primary cause of our infertility - namely implantation failure.

Porridgeislife · 09/10/2021 16:33

And the only indication we had to go on was a 3cm chocolate cyst as well.

Original poster

AliceAbsolum · 09/10/2021 16:33

@Porridgeislife

Goodness. I've had an mri and all normal. Did you have a lap?

OP posts:

Porridgeislife · 09/10/2021 16:35

Yes, had a lap. We thought it was just removing a hydrosalpinx but it ended up being 4.5 hours long as I was riddled with it. I had a clear MRI with no endo present 4 days prior to surgery.

Holskey · 09/10/2021 16:36

I don't think there's even the slightest possibility of me getting pregnant without IVF (unexplained infertility) so it I guess if my periods were annoying, I'd consider it. I think I'd be pretty resentful of painful long periods given the only reason we have periods is for reproductive purposes. I already resented standard period pains like they were a sadistic punishment and a cruel joke. Might be quite liberting to say "fuck you" to the whole cycle that has never worked for you. Depends on how strongly you feel about that small chance monthly and the effect that has on you.

Folklore9074 · 09/10/2021 16:36

IVF veteran here. Don't think it is unreasonable to try and save yourself the psychological torment of wondering if this month a miracle has happened but I'd also be considering the effect that being on hormonal contraception could have on your body over the course of a year. Speak to your fertility doctor, email the clinic or seek out some other medical opinion on this. That's what I'd do x

Original poster

AliceAbsolum · 09/10/2021 16:37

@Porridgeislife

Yes, had a lap. We thought it was just removing a hydrosalpinx but it ended up being 4.5 hours long as I was riddled with it. I had a clear MRI with no endo present 4 days prior to surgery.

Wow. I'm quite stunned

OP posts:

Flip