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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Stick it out for 20mths til retirement or ***k It and leave now and live on my savings

119 replies

booboo57 · 08/10/2021 08:55

I have just had enough of my relatively well paid but stressful job.
Last couple of years have been so difficult with Covid, wfh etc but now we are back in the office pt it is no better. Don't get me wrong, my job is no where near as hellish as some who post on here but i have just had enough.

Can't motivate myself to get my arse in gear, things are slipping, I'm forgetting to do things. Feels more than the usual up and downs as i've had this feeling since June.
One of the reasons for taking this job on was the extra money i could save for my retirement, i manage to save nearly £1k most months (I know, I'm really lucky). Some of this has been spent on home improvments and v expensive holiday in a Cornish spa hotel this summer (so worth it but did nothing to improve my attitude to work).
DH rekons I'm mad to pass up the opportunity to save more money for the sake of a few months. Looked at going part-time or changing roles but the thought of starting again in a new role is so depressing.
My current plan is to give my 3 months notice next month. Have six months off over the summer and if i really hate it look at a temping or such in Sept. next year.

What do you think? I feel I'm being a bit chicken giving up and not "leaning in" but on the other hand I deserve some time to myself.

OP posts:
Scottishflower65 · 08/10/2021 19:30

I’m in a similar position of wondering when to go. As an experiment, currently living on my estimated pension income if I retire next year (not counting state pension as another 10 years to go) to see how it feels. So far, so good. Like other PPs, you need to crunch all the numbers.

Mistressiggi · 08/10/2021 20:40

I am really stupid but have no idea how to being to "crunch the numbers". Would your pension provider tell you? (Am a teacher, all pension with same people) Or do you need to pay a financial adviser to do it?

Scottishflower65 · 08/10/2021 21:13

@Mistressiggi
I have a teachers pension too. Register with the relevant pension website and you should be able to access your latest statement. It will show you the amount of pension you have accrued to date. If you want to leave before your normal retirement date, your pension would be actuarially reduced. These reduction factors will also be on the pension website. Check if you have any automatic lump sum.
The other side of the equation is to add up all your annual outgoings so you can see if you can live ok within your pension income. Ideally plus a fun fund for holidays, major outgoings, and treats.
You can finesse in many ways but that’s the basic idea.
Go on net of tax figures if you can. When I don’t have to pay 41% tax and another big chunk of pension contribution, the results were much better. My gross pay more than halves but my net pension is close to 5/8 of my net pay.
PS please don’t call yourself stupid. I know many academics who don’t understand pensions.

Buttons294749 · 08/10/2021 21:22

I would stick it out... can you book an amazing holiday every 4 months to keep you going?

Mistressiggi · 09/10/2021 00:18

Thank you @Scottishflower65 that was very very helpful (and very kindly put Smile )

simitra · 09/10/2021 00:27

Can you delegate more, put less effort into the job and work shorter hours? They are hardly going to sack you because they would have to go through a long and complex disciplinery process.

simitra · 09/10/2021 00:32

Some time back I decided to leave work and go to university to improve my prospects. Like one of the other posters I began to do less and less in work, and to be honest no one noticed. I spent 6 months winding down without a pang of conscience. You are a long time dead.

stakhanovite · 09/10/2021 00:47

OMG I have about 10 years I have to survive in a job I've hated forever. 20 months is so doable! Also, we're at a very strange stage in the UK and global economy. Anything could happen. If I were you I'd take the opportunity to crank out a few more thousand in savings while planning all the good stuff you're going to do with the rest of your life.

LadyLolaRuben · 09/10/2021 01:04

Life is too short, leave sooner rather than later. My dad died suddenly a short while after retirement - brain haemorrhage. I wish he had retired years before - he had the means but was too cautious.

gofg · 09/10/2021 04:06

I would say leave now if you aren't happy. I took voluntary redundancy three years ago as I hated my workplace. I haven't been able to find another permanent job, but I'm much happier than I was and I don't care if all my savings disappear - life is too short to be miserable.

VestaTilley · 09/10/2021 04:11

It all depends on the size of your pension pots, whether DH is willing to support you, and whether or not you have a very large cushion of savings or other assets. Have you paid off your mortgage?

Monty27 · 09/10/2021 04:31

Speak to your GP because there's obviously something affecting your well-being which is primary.
If you get signed off your employers might agree to let you go early without losses
Depends really on that

BookWorm45 · 09/10/2021 07:48

Like some other PPs, my DH and I are still working /earning, but we're spending based on the "retirement" theorteical amount we think we'd need. This is an amount which we picked after reading a good article in Which about what a couple needs in retirement.

We've been doing this for a year or more and found it very helpful. There were some items we hadn't thought of in our first budget, others were either cheaper or more expensive than our estimate. The budget has also included holidays, treats etc.

We've also been reviewing our pensions in detail - one is Teachers' Pension Scheme and therefore very limited and rigid, the other is a private employer where the choice is out of drawdown (more likely) or annuity.

This is our version of "doing the numbers" to help with deciding when is it time to leave work.

On top of all the financial stuff, there's a further aspect which the OP drew out - when is it time to go, not for finance reasons, but because of feeling thoroughly fed up. This is something I'm thinking hard about.

Cocomarine · 09/10/2021 12:14

@VestaTilley

It all depends on the size of your pension pots, whether DH is willing to support you, and whether or not you have a very large cushion of savings or other assets. Have you paid off your mortgage?
It’s clear in thread that OP does not need her husband to support her, and is the financially stronger party who would be covering early retirement with her own savings.
Justbecauseofit · 09/10/2021 12:16

Can you reduce to part time a few days a week for the next 20 months?

TeacupDrama · 09/10/2021 15:41

Going part time can adversely affect your pension sometimes as pension can be based on the average of salary for last 3 years rather than lifetime so if you go part time and your pension ends up being based on 3 day working week you might be better just going early you need to really carefully check with provider as to whether going part time will affect pay out.

booboo57 · 11/10/2021 13:32

Thanks again for more suggestions.
Interestingly I have just spoken to my GP as I am so tired all the time and keep forgetting things at work, another reason why I'm fed up. He basically said we will do some bloods to check for a problem but a full-on, full-time job at 64 after the last year or so, no wonder you're feeling burnt out.
I like the idea of living on a budget for a while too. During the pandemic we mainly switched to a regular Waitrose shopping, what else was there to do but eat good food. I think I'll have no problem going back to Lidl but I will give it a try. The added bonus will be more savings.
I really don't think I could work part-time in this or related role. Not becasue it wouldn't be available but because I wouldn't be able to stop myself getting fully involved. As far as my work is concerned it is all or nothing for me. I absolutely could not coast for the next 20mths. I had thought of looking for p/t elsewhere but haven't the energy at the moment for a new role.
Am going to start working on fitness and diet too, why wait until retirement. I keep saying I've no time, too tired, etc but that could just be a vicious circle. I think I should make time, call it retirement prep in my head, will maybe make it more motivating.
I've a meeting with my fiancail advisor this week too.
I think I'm moving towards that decison.

It is so helpful to share with people on here who are completely neutral, thank you.

OP posts:
booboo57 · 11/10/2021 15:36

OMG the typos, sorry!

OP posts:
Egghead68 · 11/10/2021 20:10

I think I should make time, call it retirement prep in my head, will maybe make it more motivating.
I've a meeting with my fiancail advisor this week too.
I think I'm moving towards that decison

Sounds like a great plan. Good luck.

Remember you can also get free advice from Pensionwise, the government pension advisory service: www.moneyhelper.org.uk/en/pensions-and-retirement/pension-wise

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