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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not make DD go to dance lessons?

6 replies

Cookingbynumbers · 07/10/2021 15:44

Dd is 11, has done contemporary dance lessons one evening a week for a few years.
She decided now she is at high school she no longer wants to go, which is fine. She has other things that interest her more.
We have to give notice which I have done, which means we have paid until half term. This is also fine, she only decided to stop once she had gone back to school.
She doesn’t want to go to the paid-for lessons and I’m not going to force her as she’s stopping anyway, plus it means I don’t have to sit outside and wait for her for an hour when I can be at home and doing other things.
Her friend also goes to the lessons, I would bring her home after which I didn’t mind doing as she had younger siblings and it clashed with their dinner and bath time. Her mum is now cross with me because she’s going to have to sort out getting her own child home. I did tell her last week that dd was stopping. Apparently I should ‘make her go’ to the end of term. The friend is also stopping at half term, I suspect because of the lifts not being available rather than actually wanting to stop.

Aibu for not forcing my dd to go to the activity just because the other mum wants a lift back for her child? She’s been on about it every time I’ve seen her this week.

OP posts:
crumblebug · 07/10/2021 15:46

Yanbu

AntiHop · 07/10/2021 15:47

Other mum is a cf!

BowledOverly · 07/10/2021 15:47

No. YANBU.
You’ve done a nice thing. The fact that this favour now has to stop is just tough. Your friend is an entitled CF

RedskyThisNight · 07/10/2021 15:48

The rule in my household is if a club is paid for you see it out. So I would expect DD to go until half term.
I wouldn't change my plans based on another parent though - assuming you gave her sufficient time to make other arrangements.

Leftphalange · 07/10/2021 16:15

YANBU! I also did the same with my DDs swimming lessons.

Up to the other mother to sort her own child. I have to sometimes be flexible and keep my younger ones up to collect from activities. Early dinner or early bath followed by pjs and book in the car isn't going to kill them x

Skysblue · 07/10/2021 17:14

Yanbu. You and DD have decided to stop going. So you stop going. You aren’t responsible for the other child and her mum is being very rude.

Someone upthread has a rule ‘If it’s paid for you go to it.” Of course fair enough choose whatever family rules work for you, but I personally see zero point in forcing someone to dance if they don’t want to. That’s not really what dancing should be about!

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