AIBU for not going?

[ivfbabymomma1]

I was just wondering if I could get some advice and I'm fully prepared to be told to get a grip.

It's my SILs hen do next year in Spain (I'm a bridesmaid) and I was sent a message about it a few weeks ago. There is no back story and me and my SIL get on. The hen do is being planned by a mutual friend. I've been told it will cost around £800 including spends.

I do not want to go to this hen do purely because I don't want to leave my 18 month old for that long (3 nights) nor do I want to be in a different country from him. I could save up and afford it but then I'd rather spend the money on going away with my son as we haven't had the chance due to covid.

I would be leaving my son with my DH which isn't an issue I just don't want to be that far away for that length of time.

I explained this to the mutual friend/bride to be and apparently this is an unacceptable excuse and that "other people are going who have Kids"

Am I being precious? I'm being made to feel like my feelings are valid I guess or I'm just being a wet lettuce.

There is a UK hen do I've said I'd be happy to attend....

What do you think? Thank you and sorry all the details are probably jumbled!

Thank you all! I 100% agree it will end up costing more! Some of the club admission prices are 100 euros alone!!! Mental! And it's not really my scene anyway!!

I've declined the invitation and said I'm not willing to discuss it further!

Thank you so much again x

YANBU, who needs a 3 day hen do? That's just a short holiday!

Well done and if asked again. Simply say "no, I'm attending the UK part" on repeat if required.

YANBU.

I left DD for two nights for the first time recently and she's 2.5. It was nice but I was absolutely ready to come home and see her again. At 18 months I would have struggled a lot, especially for an additional night in another country.

What other people choose to do is totally irrelevant, so wouldn't pay attention to that! Also £800 for three nights for one person is ridiculous, especially when it's not doing stuff and the location of your choice!

No way are you being unreasonable.
I had an abroad hen do and only a very small group came, in no way do I resent those who didn’t, it’s a big ask and I made sure that all of my friends knew that they were invited but that there was no expectation on them.
Some brides think everyone’s lives need to revolve around them, it’s bizarre.

If that’s there reaction to you not going that would make my mind up away way, how rude!
It’s fine not to go