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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think the word 'shouting' has become so overused it has become pointless.

5 replies

Sofaking355 · 05/10/2021 22:48

I constantly hear people on mn and in real life saying x, y, and z 'shouted' at them when I think people use this term to try to villainize somebody who either confronted them, asserted themselves, or stood their ground.

I am a teacher and the kids constantly say I or other staff do it when we reprimand a kid in a normal voice, furthermore, I hear staff do the same about managers when said manager just told off the teacher over something. I have even heard my head telling off a staff member in a calm voice and the teacher goes to the pub later and said ''he was screaming in my face'' which was beyond the truth.

Even my dh does it when I call him on something in a normal tone, rather than admit his wrongdoing, he will use the old 'why are you shouting' gaslighting to try and deflect the issue.

Shouting is NOT a telling-off or a rebuke, shouting is loud voice that would be heard from far away and would signal loss of temper. People use the word to try and play the victim.

OP posts:
CoughingInAisle15 · 05/10/2021 22:52

It’s one of many overused words, along with legend, hero and brave.

Hellocatshome · 05/10/2021 22:53

Where I grew up we used to say "I got shouted at by the teacher" to just mean told off,.it caused a bit of confusion when I moved area and people thought I meant actually shouted at. I wasn't saying it to get more sympathy or whatever it genuinely is the term we all used for "told off". Mind you where I live now they say "I got wrong off the teacher" which makes me inwardly cringe.

Sofaking355 · 05/10/2021 22:54

It’s one of many overused words, along with legend, hero and brave

I don't even think people realise people what shouting is/isn't anymore. So many mners come in AIBU with a story where they got 'shouted' at by dh etc and I have to wonder was it actual shouting??

OP posts:
Sofaking355 · 05/10/2021 22:56

Where I grew up we used to say "I got shouted at by the teacher" to just mean told off,.it caused a bit of confusion when I moved area and people thought I meant actually shouted at

yep and I think this is why aibu stories we hear get lost in translation as posters will use the word and it automatically makes the other party look unreasonable when 'shouting' may be an inaccurate description of what happened.

OP posts:
mij66 · 05/10/2021 22:58

I had a student just the other day say "Why are you shouting at me?" I was barely even telling him off just asking him to think about how he talked to other students, and how that might make them feel. I don't think he even realised till I pointed out to him I was only talking to him.

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