Planned section. How much notice did you get? AIBU?

[Impromtuchange1]

I'm 36.5 weeks

I have been approved by my consultant to have an elective cesarian by maternal request, however there is a strong medical grounds component to it too. I almost died during childbirth with my last baby (vaginal delivery) and have been left with PTSD and pretty bad birth injuries. I could not go through the same again and it has been reccomended that I don't try to.

I had a growth scan today as requested by my consultant and she put a note on my file requesting I go to DAU afterwards to get a form(?) done and get a date booked in for the section.

I went to DAU and after being sent between departments twice as they didn't know what to do with me, one of the consultant midwives said she's read my file and completed the nessecary form for me - so thats all sorted and i'll get my section date in the post in a couple of weeks. She was in a rush and couldn't stop to discuss.

A couple of weeks takes me to 38.5 so I feel like a sitting duck, largely due to my other children coming spontaneously at 38 weeks and 38.2 respectively.

Obviously a pre op will be nessecary aswell, so how much notice will I get for that?

I don't drive and I'm 60 minutes away from the hospital via two busses.

Due to having titrated anti-E antibodies I need to be under the care of the hospital when I deliver as baby will need immediate cord testing so that's another reason a spontaneous delivery is problematic.

I also need as much notice as possible to arrange childcare for my existing children otherwise I'll be going through the surgery on my own, I cannot stress enough how scared I am of that being the case. The relative who has agreed to have them isn't local or reliable if not given much notice and can't just pop down on a whim with a days notice.

DH needs to let work know as far in advance as possible too.

I thought I would know where I'm at with it being a cesarian, its supposed to eliminate some of the stresses but I'm more stressed than ever.

I'm worried I'll go into labour before I get a section date which I just couldn't manage emotionally or physically, or that I'll end up having major surgery alone because I haven't been given ample notice to sort alternative childcare.

How much notice did you get?

AIBU to be feeling irritated at the uncertainty at this stage?

Oh wow, I feel very lucky having read this. We were given our c section date at 20 weeks! I’m sorry you’re having to wait around, sounds so stressful.

Your consultant I would have thought

I decided on a section at 38+2, got a date from the consultant appt over the phone at 38+6 for 7 days later. Was assured if I showed any signs of labour before that to ring them straight away and they would just arrange section there and then and be ready for when I arrived at the hospital. Had a pre op and covid test the day before.

In my trust, we get "booked in" at 36 weeks. What this actually means though, is that we are added to the list for the week that we are 39 weeks. The actual date and time is texted to us 5-7 days beforehand. So it's a bit of an odd one. With my elcs I got the text on the Wednesday to say I was going in on the Monday. I assume it will be the same this time - I'm not 36 weeks yet but have a consultant appointment booked in for then. However, the consultant was very clear that if I did go into labour early it would be treated as an emergency section and I should head to hospital ASAP so I could be taken to theatre in good time. This was a relief to me as, like you, my first birth was awful and there was no way I was going through that again!

@Impromtuchange1 I talked to my midwife about this today at the hospital. It looks like they’ll recommend a c section for me… how I’m going to give birth will be decided by 35 weeks, and I’ll get a specific date between 37 and 38 weeks. The midwife did say there wouldn’t be much notice, an pre-op will be two days before.

If you go into natural labour beforehand, they ask you to go in ASAP and they do the section then, if you’re not too progressed.

I do hope they can tell you sooner, but it doesn’t seem unusual that they won’t, sadly

Hopefully in the event of spontaneous labour I can get there in time for a section to be possible, fingers crossed!

With my others, I was 10cm and 5cm when I got to the hospital. I wasn't even sure I was in labour with DS as it was all in my back and had no particular rhythm.

I guess I'll have to be on high alert for anything that could maybe be labour and not wait around and take my chances that it's braxton hicks which I tend to get alot of.

Two days - rang me on the Monday to tell me to come in at 7am on Wednesday. Was exactly 38 weeks.

I had a few days notice. I seem to remember I had to call up daily for a while to get confirmation and was left in limbo for a while. Then on the agreed date “something came up” with some emergencies in the hospital and it ended up being the next day. This was UCLH.

And as a PP has said, it’s your vagina so ignore whoever is trying to derail your plans. I had to deal with an arrogant male consultant who decided at 36 weeks to change all my plans and tried to talk me into a vaginal birth even though the obstetrician who was present during my first awful emergency c-section categorically stated that I shouldn’t even attempt it in the future.

If men gave birth this shit just wouldn’t happen.

I got my date at 36 weeks. It was 39+1.

It didn't matter, I went at 37 weeks and had an emergency section.

I'm aghast at people getting 1-2 days notice, that would be so stressful. I really hope that doesn't end up being the case for me.

With DS (not my birth trauma baby, but the one before) I was labouring on the bus to hospital which was interesting. That hospital was only 15 minutes up the road too, the hospital i'm under now is an hour away.

We've never felt the need to get a car, living in London, but now is a time i really do wish I had one.

It almost feels like it's a given that I'm going to go into labour before I get the date

That's another downside of swapping hospitals this time, although done with good reason, if I'm to go in at any potential niggle and not actually be in labour I foresee alot of faffing about on busses backwards and forwards.

Can't you get a taxi instead of the bus? Expensive but if you had a car you would be paying over a thousand a year to buy and maintain it.

Mine was booked in at 36 weeks for 40 weeks as that was the first slot they had. It was then cancelled on the day and so I ended up having it at 40+2. They weren't that bothered as said I would just have an emergency section if I went into labour early. My first child was early but this one wasn't so I had the section as planned. I would ask your midwife to chase it up for you although it sounds as though you should be prepared to have it at 39-40 weeks. Hospitals don't usually do elective sections every day so if you find out what days they do them that might help narrow it down further.

Date given at about 26 weeks for 39 weeks. First baby was spontaneous labour at 38 weeks but this one stayed put till c-day.

My twins were delivered by C-section earlier this year. My consultant refused to book me in until a week before the C-section took place, despite my very high anxiety throughout the pregnancy. My midwife also tried to pin them down for a date, but they refused. Not knowing really added to my anxiety. They were well aware of this, but refused to budge.

Good point from @SnackSizeRaisin
Our hospital only book in elective sections for Tuesdays and Thursdays and have 2 theatres running.
So although I was waiting for the date I had a tough idea of when it might be.

Rough not tough!

I’m currently 28 weeks and have had my CS date since 18 weeks

With my first, j had placenta previa and was given my date at 36 weeks for delivery at 38+6

A guy I work with, his partner is having a CS tomorrow and she was only given the date yesterday, she had to go straight to hospital for the preop after getting the call. It does seem like a couple of days notice is getting more common.

I had a weeks notice

@Impromtuchange1

Thank you all for the subsequent replies

Any idea who I need to ask to speak to when I ring to chase it up and ask to be told the date?

My other children were born at Lewisham and despite the horrible birth, i had no need to call and chase anything up during the pregnancies themselves.

Are you having any pre-delivery counselling?

Unfortunately not, but I have had EMDR therapy for my birth trauma which I do feel helped alot. I've coped pretty well throughout this pregnancy with limited anxieties as I felt I was in good hands, it's just now I'm so close to the end everything is suddenly so uncertain.

Speak to your midwife OP about some extra support. Being anxious is doing neither if you any good and she should be able to facilitate a date and some support. I had counselling organised by my bereavement midwife (fell pregnant shortly after losing one fairly traumatically so she sort of stayed in background for support) and it was very much needed and helped. Sending hugs x

I had an appointment today and I'm booked in for the 3rd of November.