What should I expect of him

[Ilikenewbedding]

Not really an IABU, just posting for traffic.

You're 6 years into a relationship, 2 DC. Your OH was fantastic for the first few years, but after a traumatic incident he needed therapy for a year and went on needing help with medication and still has bad days (unable to sleep, flashbacks, panic attacks etc)
Aside from that he's home full time as due to an undiagnosed issue with his joints he can no longer stand or walk for long periods of time. The pain is mostly in his hands, back and legs, every day.

The things he does to contribute are:
Feeding the dogs and joining us for walks
Majority of online shopping, meal prep etc
Cleaning toilet, sink (can't do the bath)
Hoovering (we have a very lightweight dyson)
Uses the steam mop in the kitchen and bathroom
Dusting/polishing/General tidying
Cooks if it's a quick easy meal
Dries and stacks dishes after I wash up
We take laundry days in turns
Nappy changes for the youngest DC in turns
Reads kids bedtime stories, dries and dresses them after a bath as he can't bathe them anymore

However you're doing pretty much everything else.

Does this sound okay? And if it does, why do I feel so resentful some days? He's kind, wonderful, caring, loving...and yet still I feel down most days as I trudge through the majority of the housework

@Aquamarine1029

Aside from that he's home full time as due to an undiagnosed issue with his joints he can no longer stand or walk for long periods of time.

"Undiagnosed issue?" So he won't/refuses to work?

Don't be an arsehole, people who can barely stand or walk are not "refusing" to work. Have some compassion for people.

I’ve had pretty severe PTSD, and still battle most days. I can honestly say that the stress of emotion does impact on you physically more than you appreciate at the time.

It sounds like he was a victim of crime? Have you had any help from victim support? If he was physically hurt by someone he may still be hyper vigilant which causes a hell of a lot of stress on the body.

Apologies, meant to add - that isn’t me asserting that his pain is “all in his head”. Was just pointing out that sometimes there is a link.

I think he does a lot, under the circumstances.

If you are his carer as well as looking after the DC, can you apply for some respite cover? You sound pretty worn down by it all.

Honestly, I think he's doing incredible amounts for someone who is as badly disabled as you say. Dog walks, vacuuming and other bits of housework must all be very hard for him if he struggles to stand.

It sounds to me like you're resentful because this isn't what you imagined your life to be, and that's okay too.