To ask if you used to be 'fat' and are now thin, are you happier now?

[Lsquiggles]

I'm overweight and a size 18. Like many others I'd love to be thin or slim but when I think about it logically, I think it's because society has conditioned me to think thin = happy.

Am I unhappy because I'm fat or because society tells me I can't/shouldn't be fat and happy?

So if you used to be big and are now at a weight/size you are comfortable with, are you happier now? And if yes, why do you think you're happier?

Yes totally. When I was heavier it was all about what should I wear that hid it, now I wear what I want and don’t have to hide anything. Feeling good about your appearance is a huge mental health positive feeling bad about it is a downer. For me.

There is also the health aspects, personally I don’t like to get out of breadth or worry about pictures, and quite honestly I don’t like it whe I’m fat.

Thanks for all these wonderful stories. You've spurred me on!
I lost 3 stone when I had gallstones and it's all back on again. I'm miserable and unhealthy. Going to get right back on plan from now ❤ I miss running but i don't enjoy it as much when I'm this big. Which I've only really just thought about.

Lost 2 stone last year and I've hit a bit of a plateau now . Another stone off would put me at the top end of a normal bmi so I'm still a little fat .
I'm so much happier. I'm enjoying clothes again . I'm more confident . I'm not dreading bumping into people that haven't seen me in years.
I do look my age though. Part of me thought thin me now would be similar to thin me 20 years ago but my craggy face gives me away .
I'm honestly just full of gratitude that I was able to do it and maintain it .

Brilliant success stories everyone, well done! I was slim all my life until I had my children (4), where I struggled to lose the final stone after each pregnancy. So now I have 4 stone to lose. I'm actually happier generally now than I use to be when thin, but that is unrelated to the weight. I'm just at a happier time of my life. I expect I could be even happier if/when I manage to lose the weight. I don't even need to lose it all, I'd be delighted with 2 or 3 stone. I feel quite healthy currently though, despite being much larger than before. I do a lot of walking and feel comfortable. I'm aware this could change as I get older though. But I hate having to think about what I'm wearing to cover up my stomach.

Wonderful, inspiring stories on here!

@Justilou1

Yes… absolutely. I was morbidly obese from when I had my kids until my late 40’s. Something simply had to give. I lost 60kgs. I feel better psychologically and I’m in much less pain. I also look a million years younger. My 30’s and mid-40’s were spent feeling ashamed of how I looked and every single thing I put in my mouth. I can honestly say I feel stronger because I have battled a huge demon and won - am also taken more seriously too. Two photos, aged about 35/36 (and not my biggest) and again at 48.

You certainly don't look 48 in your 'after' photo - well done on your weight loss.

100% happier. I feel confident and happy in my clothes. I want to go places now, rather than hide away. I don't dread family get togethers anymore and I LOVE bumping into people I know when I'm out and about. When I was heavier, I wanted to crawl back into my shell because I felt rubbish about myself.

It's made me rethink my wardrobe and make up too. I take care choosing my clothes each day and wear make up to compliment my outfit. I also do something with my hair and feel great. Never bothered with all this before because I wanted to be invisible.

No one likes being fat. I don't believe anyone who says it and am really sceptical of people who's personality revolves around being fat. The overly fat positive people.

Being able to walk or run and enjoy being healthy is great. Being able to be active is great. The pandemic has made me realise just how valuable that it.

I'll be honest that I've never been fat, but why wouldn't you want to be healthy?

This is kind of a daft thread. Most of us are at our skinniest in our teen years and I wouldn't exactly call those a blissful phase of life!

You need to distinguish between the physical impact of weight (possibly harder to be active, health problems) and the social impact (shame and stigma). Some people are bigger from childhood and stay that way through life, whether through a biological issue or an emotional difficulty that makes them overeat.

Fat positivity isn't necessarily about saying that being fat has zero health impacts, it's about saying that fat people shouldn't have to hide away feeling ashamed and unworthy pending some future date when they meet a weight goal and are allowed to be part of society. Because for a lot of fat people, that day will never come and they deserve happiness as much as anyone else. The shame actually keeps people indoors, eating crisps.

I went from 17.5 stone to 11.5. I'm 5 ft 11.

I never properly understood how big I was at the time. Even now I'm a size 12 I still look in the mirror and fee fat because I've never had a healthy body image. I still think my thighs are too big but now I see my daughter developing the same body shape it's reconfigured my thinking as she is perfect. Fixing mind as important as fixing body!

BUT

Losing weight gave me confidence. I thi k we all have a healthy set point and at 17 stone I did not look healthy and happy. I smile more now, have more fun with clothes, sex life has definitely improved as I'm more flexible and feeling sexier so it sparks it up more. I'm more confident.

However! It did make me look a bit younger, I was taken less seriously in a managerial role in new job. People would comment on my looks and skinniness.

I also when I was at my skinniest, 10st 4, my body was weak and cold, and I developed adult onset allegies - I swear it's connected to putting my body through hell to lose weight. I think we all need a bit on us to have a natural and healthy shape and we all have a natural point that suits us best, some skinny, some curvy but the main thing is 100% you - that's the key to happiness I think ❤️

Yes and yes. Not because of being vain but because I don’t have to try and be invisible because I was so ashamed. It’s a mind change not the body being beautiful

Yes and no.

I used to weigh 15 stone, lost 6 stone in a year though diet and exercise. I have somewhat of an addictive personality and didn’t stop. I swapped one addiction for another (exercise) and lost more weight and at my smallest was around 8 stone and a size 4/6 (I’m 5’ 7”).

I eventually sought help and for the last 15 years have hovered around 9 stone (except for pregnancies). I am happy with my weight now and don’t over exercise. I would encourage anyone to lose weight who wanted to but I would also encourage you to address any mental health issues as well.

Good luck.

Through my late twenties to early thirties I never thought about weight, just ate whatever and slowly gained til I hit obese.

Im 40 now and lost weight down to 'normal' six months ago and it has been amazing. So many things (tiredness, aches, etc) I put down to my age have just gone! I sleep better, my body moves easier, a walk into town that before would have felt like a massive deal now seems easy. I can crawl around in the floor with my kids with so much less effort. I have so much energy, I feel I can actually achieve the stuff I want to with my life rather than feeling I need to stop and sit down every ten minutes because the weight was exhausting.

I wish I'd done it ten years ago, to be honest. It has been life changingly wonderful for me.

When I was thinner I wasn't exactly all round happier, but it did feel like one less thing to worry about. But tbh other worries/concerns/unhappiness will always be waiting in the wings, ready to fill the gap.

I've been 9st 2 at my lightest (size 10-12, I'm short) and 15st 6 at my heaviest (that's right now, size 20-22).

I loathe myself but try not to look in the mirror if I can help it. Eating the things I love freely with no limits makes me feel blissful and content, rebellious (fuck you society) and "free" - I just try to block out the side effects of an ugly heavy body, hideous double chin, getting out of breath walking up the slightest hill, heartburn and reflux, stomach pains, fretting about what people think when they look at me. I don't have any physical health issues though and I'm not pre-diabetic surprisingly.

I have been thinner on and off and I certainly felt fitter, more attractive and more confident. Although I always have trouble with clothes when thin, like I only know how to dress a fat body - when I dress my slim body nothing seems to fit right.

I am ready to do something about my weight, but now I'm menopausal it seems so much harder to shift, and I've started and failed so many times that I find it very hard to visualise a successful outcome no matter how determined I feel.

I did post here about it once hoping for inspirational stories to motivate me but got my fat arse handed to me for not trying hard enough.

Don't think I've ever been thin. I was the same weight for nearly all my life. Which was ok. At my heaviest now which I really don't like.

I can't relate to some of these posts: some of these posts sound unbalanced mentally, eating nothing to get to a size 6 is not healthy.

I’ve been everything between an 8-18 and can honestly say it makes no difference to my happiness at all. I don’t really care about fashion or clothes so I don’t get the same buzz related to that that others do here. The only motivation for me is health related- I have a lot of autoimmune conditions and feel my long term health would be better if I kept at a decent weight. But other than that I’m far happier not worrying about it at all and just eating whatever I like.

Lost 4 stone two years ago. I can leap in and out of bed, no aches or pains and walk up to 6 miles per day. I am in my seventies.

I was a size 22 and now I'm a size 12. I hate my body more now due to the disgusting excess skin. My stomach is like play dough. The kids sit and smoosh it. My boobs are like spaniel ears. I can literally roll them up and put them in my armpits. I'm under 30. I'm trying to do body positivey and all that stuff. I cant afford anything else. I mean yeah I can walk and run and do things now i couldn't before. But I can't look at myself naked.

@DecorChange

I was a size 22 and now I'm a size 12. I hate my body more now due to the disgusting excess skin. My stomach is like play dough. The kids sit and smoosh it. My boobs are like spaniel ears. I can literally roll them up and put them in my armpits. I'm under 30. I'm trying to do body positivey and all that stuff. I cant afford anything else. I mean yeah I can walk and run and do things now i couldn't before. But I can't look at myself naked.

Just coming on to say similar to this. I was a size 20 and dropped to an 12. The excess skin made me feel so ugly and wobbly. I wouldn't let my husband see me naked. Sex became a dread unless it was at night with the lights out. When I was a larger size I didn't have issues with any of this.

So I decided to regain a few stone. Not ideal for health or covid outcomes but I'm now a size 16 and it's a happy compromise. My saggy skin has filled out and I'm still feeling healthy and active and sexy once again.

I've cycled between size 12 to now where I am pushing a size 18. Life is easier slim and I am more confident. I feel judged as fat and lazy at this size and my joints are aching. I hate my clothes are tight.

I also think my weight reflects my happiness as I definitely comfort eat. Years of long hours at work in an emotionally demanding job, young children and lockdowns have increased my weight dramatically.

Interestingly I'm not sure I've ever felt 'thin'. As a size 12 I look out of proportion ( too skinny) as I'm quite tall and big framed. It took me a long time to realise Skinnier didn't equally nicer body shape. It was always my body shape but with more or less padding.

Most of my life I've felt fat, but when I look back at photos of myself I absolutely wasn't and I feel sad I didn't realise that.

Much happier thin. I was a size 16 and now a size 10 (4 stone). While size 16 isn't massive, I'd crossed into "obese" territory (according to BMI). I'm tall so I probably can get away with a bit more weight. Some of my problems about being overweight were definitely psychological (feeling like people would see me differently) but that's probably because I was thin all my life up until I get pregnant with DD.

I'm no longer ashamed to have my photo taken. For years there were no photos of me, even with the kids, which I feel terrible about.

I don't feel embarrassed to exercise where people might see me. I hated the gym and although I did C25k I always felt people were looking at me when out running in public (I'm sure now they probably weren't, but that's how I felt!)

I now enjoy shopping for clothes. For years I wore the same things because I hated buying bigger clothes. Or I'd just buyer smaller versions of the things I liked thinking I'd slim into them. I didn't.

I enjoy going out in my home town when I go home to visit my parents. Even going to the shops I was always conscious of the possibility of bumping into someone from school or that I knew from way back when I was thin. I hated the idea of them seeing me fat!

I'm self employed and have my own business and losing weight has actually improved my ability to work, make good decisions, get up earlier etc. (because I eat healthier and don't feel so sluggish). Food doesn't control my life anymore so I can focus on more important things.

I'm happier in my relationship because I'm no afraid to be seen with my clothes off.

I'm no longer prediabetic and on the fast track to diabetes. Plus my cholesterol and blood pressure are back to normal.

I don't sweat so much! Warm weather was horrible for me (even though I enjoy the sun) because I would just sweat so much, particularly my face which is horrible. I think it's a hormonal thing that happens when I'm overweight, but once I lost the weight I could go out on warm days and not be afraid of sweat pouring off me.

I think maybe I'd have been happier fat if I'd been fat all my life, but I was always tall and thin and it was easy for me to maintain that for a long time. Getting fat was a real shock to the system and I stayed that way for 7 years before I could get my eating under control.

@KT727 that’s a little unfair to @TyotyaKlava -its all relative.

If someone is nearly 2 & 1/2 stone heavier than their usual petite, trim weight, & 2-3 dress sizes bigger, they will feel it just as much as someone a bigger size will feel uncomfortable putting the weight on and going up a couple of sizes.

[quote Whentheydontmeanwhattheysay]**@KT727* that’s a little unfair to @TyotyaKlava* -its all relative.

If someone is nearly 2 & 1/2 stone heavier than their usual petite, trim weight, & 2-3 dress sizes bigger, they will feel it just as much as someone a bigger size will feel uncomfortable putting the weight on and going up a couple of sizes.[/quote]
Yes okay subjectively you can feel fat with any BMI, but you're only really fat as in overweight if you have a BMI of over 25 and really most people only consider others fat if they have an obese BMI.

I'm the other way ..size 8 most of my life, felt cold and hated how I look...had DD...now a vvvv happy size 12/14 and frightened to go slimmer.... I don't want to be that cold again and have no energy

[quote Whentheydontmeanwhattheysay]**@KT727* that’s a little unfair to @TyotyaKlava* -its all relative.

If someone is nearly 2 & 1/2 stone heavier than their usual petite, trim weight, & 2-3 dress sizes bigger, they will feel it just as much as someone a bigger size will feel uncomfortable putting the weight on and going up a couple of sizes.[/quote]
If I'm honest I'm not really sorry!

Suggesting that a size 10 is heavy is actually really unhealthy and promotes eating disorders. Anyone can feel fat, whether they are 5 stone and suffering from anorexia nervosa, or 30 stone, but in reality unless you have an overweight or obese BMI you are not fat.

Most people have spoken about being a size 16/18 or larger on this thread; sizes/weights that other people would also consider to be overweight and I think the OP was asking about being objectively fat and then losing weight rather than being slim and trimming down to 7 stone.