To be surprised no one I know is using a childminder

[Aftermidnightstrikes]

Or a nanny, actually. They seem commonplace here but in RL everyone opts for nurseries. Has anyone else found this?

@Ozanj I find that astonishing considering I know lots of childminders myself included who are fully inclusive and support parents throughout working closely with portage. Although what I have found is that childcare suddenly stops for older children with additional needs or that some minders up their fees.

I used to mind a 16yr old who was wheelchair bound with complex needs in the holidays and mum travelled a good 20 miles to get to me because no one else would accommodate her needs. It wasn't easy due to access but we got temporary ramps and made necessary adaptations and I only charged my standard fee. Just because some can't or won't doesn't mean that's the case for all.

@Barbie222 The nurseries near me do take holidays. More than one has had closed in full or part due to staff illness.

@PearandHoney my CM goes out 4-5 days a week with her mindees. There is one nursery in the area that does similar but most of them either don't take then out at all or once every few weeks. The nursery staff of those latter nurseries look miserable out and about with the children.

@Larryyourwaiter how odd to work with people and not like it particularly when you can get better pay working in a supermarket.

I used both nurserys and childminders, each had their merits but were very different.

@nokidshere
You sound like a wonderful childminder

I used a nursery and it was ok but in reflection I think my DC might have been better suited to childminder - the noise and chaos of nursery didnt suit his quiet nature.

I'd never really considered a cm for the reasons described above but with hindsight think I should have.

If I had too I would choose a nursery everytime for lots of the reasons mentioned already.
Back up cover for holidays and illness, no sole care, no being taken out food shopping, school runs etc, no visitors etc. There’s usually more space and range of equipment too in nurseries than a home environment.

@IceCreamAndCandyfloss

Genuinely intrigued as to why you think a child being taken food shopping and on the school run is a negative aspect?

I use a childminder why? Because I preferred the family home from home experience for my baby. He loves her and every morning when I drip him off he smiles and leans to go to her. He then waves me off and is clearly going 'my mum I have fun here see you later' and when i pick him up he runs to me and starts waving at my childminder.

You get good and bad of both. I had seen my childminder out and about at the park and soft play before although never spoken to her so I knew she was down on the floor playing type.

I used to work at a nursery and it wouldn't be unusual for staff to be in the corner chatting rather than interacting with the children. It just wasn't on public view so tge parents didn't know. Naturally some of the staff were also excellent and did play with the children.

For those saying child protection. Don't presume a nursery doesn't mean things do not happen. A nursery near me Wass closed with hours notice due to child pornography being found on site/work computers.
Not saying there are not dodgy childminders but their are dodgy nurseries too. Prior to that event the nursery had an excellent reputation and it was only discovered due to a child going to hospital and doctors noticed signs which indicated possible sexual abuse and alerted the correct people.

A schoolfriends mum was a childminder growning up, and she was the most lovely woman (childminder from that experience was my first choice, dh was nursery from the off.) however like a pp, I couldn't find a cm that ds took to or that me and DH both liked. I even met with one who said she would only take full-time children, we only needed 1 day at that point as I was pt and we had grandparent care. Nursery were willing to go with our needs, although a few wanted 2 session and that couldn't be morning and afternoon same day.

We actually went with the first nursery we looked around, small, only 30 children, ds has been there 2 years and apart from maternity, none of the staff have changed. He loves the team, the key workers have 4 children each, and we have an amazing relationship with ds's.

We've actually both changed jobs since he started and the nursery is nowhere near work for either of us anymore, which is concerning if either of us need to get to him fast. It also makes it slightly inconvenient, but ds is settled and happy, so we won't change, and any subsequent children will be going there.

@nokidshere

I've been a childminder for over 20yrs. I'm flexible, I follow the same curriculum as nursery, I'm experience, qualified, first aid trained, can count on one hand the number of days I've had to close for sickness in that time, take holidays when it suits us all. I work bank holidays, weekends, late nights and early mornings. I feed all the children a home cooked 2/3 course healthy meal every evening. I teach the older ones to cook and I facilitate their independence wherever possible in conjunction with their parents.

Most of 'my' children were or have been with me from birth to yr7. Most of the older ones, now at Uni or working, still visit and keep in touch. I am still friends with their parents.

On top of all that I have babysat for them, I take parcels for them so they can order and not worry about being at work. I help the older ones with homework and craft stuff.

I do all this for two reasons, 1: I love my job, 2: to help the parents have a relaxing evening after doing a full day at work and not having to get home and start cooking/doing homework.

I'm not unusual.

There's no changeover of staff, no unqualified youngsters being paid a pittance, flexibility and a home feel. What's not to like?

I've worked in nurseries, hospitals, private homes, for social services. There are crap staff in all those places and there are fab staff in all those places.

I wish you lived near me. 😀

I've noticed the same. No one knows uses a nanny but everyone else does use nurseries. I have so many friends who moan about their childcare costs, which are all around £1000pm. I use an amazing CM who charges me roughly £750pm for the same amount of hours. When I mention this people seem snobby about childminders and I don't understand why. My dd is developmentally quite advanced. Her speech had always been brilliant for her age and she's very confident. I believe its because she gets more one-on-one time with our CM than she'd get in a nursery setting. I also like the fact she mixes with a wide age range of children, because our CM does wrap around care for the local primary school.

I looked at nurseries and CMs but the opportunity came up to join a nanny share. I didn't think DS1 would do well in a big busy environment so I took it. It worked out amazingly and we've stuck with shared nanny ever since, no regrets. Our nanny is a much-loved, completely trusted member of the family who loves and is loved by us all. We've had very little sick time and we agree holiday time fairly easily.

I would say that there is a mix of all 3 where I am (W London). Plenty of nurseries, although some have gone under - a friend's nursery closed overnight, leaving her with two DC and no care - several local childminders, and my nanny has several local nanny friends too.

@bluewanda

I also don't understand how one single person can give enough care and attention to all those children of different ages at one time.

@Peppapigforlife How many children are assigned to one worker at a nursery though?

Exactly! I've worked in private day nurseries. It's the reason I'd never use one!

When I went back to work after maternity leave, I was the only parent I knew who chose a childminder. All of my colleagues chose nurseries.

Our childminder was a former nursery nurse and she was excellent. I’m sure I made the right choice for my one-year-old. I wanted a peaceful, home from home setting with one consistent carer. DD was able to form strong bonds with the childminder and the other children who attended regularly.

The children were taken on outings and to toddler groups, but then they could go back to the childminder’s house to chill out, which suited DD perfectly.

I used a nursery as I went to a childminder as a child. I hated it. She was nice enough no horror stories or anything. But it was a home from home. It was me having to be in some else's home all the time. I just have vivid memories of looking out of her bay window all the time watching my mum. It was very boring. I might have enjoyed an after school place with mates but they didn't exist then

I’ve had 2 different childminders for our 3 DC (due to house move) and will use our recent one again with DC4 when he’s here. I got lucky and found 2 absolutely amazing ladies. They provided a warm, loving, fun home environment, a structured day and routine (far more than I can provide), amazing meals (again sorry to say, far better than my food...) took them
on amazing trips to places I never had the time or energy to get to and did such a lovely variety of outings out of house combined with creative things at home. In 5 years of using them I might have had 3 days total with 1 of them sick etc.
A good childminder is worth their weight in gold IMO- a nursery closes and expects you there without fail at the end of the day. If my train is running late I’ll warn CM/ apologise but she won’t be stood there by the door, all lights off, giving me a stern telling off. There is much more flexibility. DC also get far more individual attention and parents more feedback than from a nursery. But I agree with putting DC in nursery for half the time at least a year before they start school so best of both worlds.

[quote glitterelf]@Ozanj I find that astonishing considering I know lots of childminders myself included who are fully inclusive and support parents throughout working closely with portage. Although what I have found is that childcare suddenly stops for older children with additional needs or that some minders up their fees.

I used to mind a 16yr old who was wheelchair bound with complex needs in the holidays and mum travelled a good 20 miles to get to me because no one else would accommodate her needs. It wasn't easy due to access but we got temporary ramps and made necessary adaptations and I only charged my standard fee. Just because some can't or won't doesn't mean that's the case for all. [/quote]
I did say it was my experience locally.

My DDs nursery used to take the children out on trips 2 or 3 times a week, trips to the post box, to get the biscuits and milk for the staff room from the local Tesco etc.

@SpottyPhone a walk to the postbox or local Tesco to buy the staff biscuits is hardly an exciting or fun activity

I only ever used a childminder. I wanted my child to be in a home environment, even if it wasn't our home. The cm we chose was a recommendation from a friend, who had been chatting to this cm for weeks at toddler group before she realised she was a cm rather than mum of 2 toddlers close in age. She was/is fantastic!!! She looked after dd2 from 6 months to 10 years, and even then she retired rather than us stopping sending DD. We still see her regularly and DD is closer to the cm than she is to any member of our extended family.

I only know one family personally who has used a childminder and they had the most positive things to say about her, most I know including myself send their children to nursery. Personally I didn't need childcare and wanted the educational and social aspect of a nursery before school.

We used a childminder at first and she was fantastic - especially through all the Covid chaos. When we moved house we stuck with her for a few months as we trusted her and DD (aged just 2 by then) was comfortable with her. However, we changed to using a nursery last January as we were concerned about the lack of contact DD was having with other children her age - there was only one of a similar age at the childminder. It's been a very different experience but for us both options have been right at different stages. Nursery have built her confidence and her speech is now very clear, but the childminder's more relaxed home environment is what we wanted when she was very little.

My childminder was great. Son was always out and about with her. Go to lots of free things like national parks, garden centres etc. Walks. Went to lots of toddler clubs before started school. He had so much fresh air. She also met up with other childminders etc. Also did the usual baking and art etc in her home. I was lucky she was so great.

In my area childminders are nearly as popular as nursery.

I wanted a home from home setting for my children. I didn’t want them stuck in the same room all day with only a small outdoor space. I found a wonderful lady who cares for them like they were her own (im unsure why some people are worried about them having a bond with one person, this is excellent for development and emotional security).

She’s at numerous playgroups per week socialising the kids. If it’s a gorgeous day the kids take a picnic and are at country parks, going on walks, the woods all day long being bought up outdoors and getting great exercise.

As people have said she has to follow the early years curriculum the same as nursery and compared to my niece who has attended nursery we have had no sick days by the childminder in 6 years (my nieces nursery shut due to staff illness spreading through it) my children haven’t been bitten by other kids and potty training has been supported etc

It’s all about who you choose and who is available in your area but here it’s popular and there are lots with very very good reputations

Where we used to live, I saw a lot of really bad childminders out and about at groups and playgrounds. Ignoring their children and leaving it to others present to notice if they were upset or fighting. I once saw a boy only about 18 months fall about 7 ft off a climbing frame and his childminder didn't even notice.

I would only use one that I had seen out and about and treating the kids well - there was one who was absolutely lovely but by the time I got to know her, we had started my son at nursery.

The nursery we used there had a lot of staff who had been there a long time, over 10 years in many cases, mostly parents themselves.

The nursery in the area we have moved to now is very small - in many ways not that different to a large childminder setting so feels like the best of both worlds.

One of the things that puts me off childminders in general is that all of the ones that I have known have done it basically because they wanted to be a SAHM for their own children but couldn't afford it. I have always worried that they would therefore favour their own kids and/or judge me for working outside the home. Suspect this is area dependent.