Friend only ever talks about work problems

[YourFinestPantaloons]

My best friend has had problems at work for some time now, but I'm starting to feel like it dominates 100% of the conversation when we're together. And most of the time, I don't understand what she means because I don't know the team understand much about her field - for example she will say "Linda, who is only on a point 13 salary, wrote the lone working policy and didn't even involve the HR director, I'm absolutely furious". I do ask her to give context but it just prolongs the talking about work and seems to confuse things even more.

This may sound selfish, because whilst I sympathise (I've been there before with working in a shit environment!) I am finding it so boring that I'm avoiding being around her at all. I also can't really give advice when I don't work in that environment or understand the full picture. I would quite like to talk about other things to do with me - for example I'm having major surgery soon, feeling really nervous about it and want to talk to her about it but she just steers the conversation back to her work: "Oh yes that reminds me when John had surgery and Steve didn't send him so much as a get well text. I hate Steve, etc etc...."

AIBU to think that this isn't a very fair friendship

God sack her off. What do you get out of this friendship?

If you want to stay friends then tell her what she’s doing and that it’s killing your friendship

She's not usually like this, but obviously worker has bogged her down. This has gone on for nearly six months now though! As selfish as it sounds, I get really bored by it.

Make a bit of a joke of it- OK you've got 15 minutes to vent about work and then that's it and we talk about other stuff. Keep bringing her back to this and try and have some fun together. If it doesn't work and the friendship is waring you down then you should tell her and move on.

I talk about work a lot these days because I have no life. Too tried to do anything else really.

She may need to socialise more or get a hobby so that she has other things to talk about.

I had one of these friends too. She worked for NHS and every Trust she worked for, there was someone who had it in for her. Every time she texted, it was to rant about work and "woe is me". I cut her off in the end as after 10 years of it, I'd kind of run out of sympathy and advice.

But yeah do as another poster suggested and do a jokey "15 mins to vent" but you may find she circles back to it later so it's how confident you feel to say "no come on, we've covered this so let's leave that"

6 months you have put up with this?

You need to be unavailable and spend time with other friends.

She's using you as an earhole.

Beyond selfish and tedious.

When she asks why you are busy tell her the truth.

Don't put up with it.

Good luck with your surgery.

I had a friend like this. I eventually told her that I find work talk really boring and too hard to follow (there wad always a long backstory). She was offended but she never spoke to me about work again.