AIBU to not be sure if I want to go to work tomorrow (TRIGGER WARNING: SUICIDE)

[ContactTraced]

Sorry if this isn’t the right place but I think I need some outside perspective (or possibly someone to tell me to pull myself together)

This evening my best friend tried commit suicide. I spent an hour and a half in the pouring rain trying to talk her down / holding her while we waited for the police to come.

When I got home I was fine… until an hour ago when I just burst into tears. I’m not sure if I can face actual people and small talk and the like tomorrow; but equally not sure if I’d be better not home by myself.

I don’t really feel anything right now, other than a bit damp eyed and tight chested.

I don’t even know what I expect anyone to say, I just wanted to write this all down I suppose.

PLEASE NOTE THIS POST HAS BEEN EDITED BY MNHQ TO REMOVE MENTION OF METHOD

That’s a really tough thing to experience emotionally. You wouldn’t be unreasonable to need a some time alone off work to process it. Hope you’re ok

So terribly sorry to hear that OP. Be kind to yourself. Get some rest and see how you feel in the morning. Sending love.

People take the day off for a lot less. You shouldn’t feel guilty about calling in sick if you need to.

How horrific op. Absolutely don't go into work tomorrow. Take a sick day and tell your manager what happened. You're a good friend and you did the right thing. Now look after yourself

That is awful op, absolutely not unreasonable of you at all and your workplace will hopefully be supportive

Oh my goodness, what an awful ordeal for you and your friend. She's in safe hands now.
I don't know what to advice, except for please look after yourself. Do you have someone to talk to in RL? Have a warm bath and a good night's sleep.
Don't go to work in the morning if you don't feel like it. Equally don't sit in alone. Your work im sure will understand if you need to turn up a couple of hours later than usual, if at all tomorrow under the circumstances. Send your boss an email for the morning, preparing them just in case.

I've talked someone out of suicide before too OP. Over four hours. I think afterwards you just feel mentally/emotionally drained, and in need of some TLC for yourself. (That sounds like I am blaming the ill person, but I'm not at all.) You've been through something big, and very scary tonight, so go easy on yourself. Have a warm drink, wrap yourself in a throw possibly? Try and get some sleep. Maybe see how you feel in the morning about work?
Just to ad, you've done something very admirable and should be commended for it.

Definitely take the day off and take care of yourself.

You're a wonderful friend.

My best mate was there for me in a similar situation last year. I can't tell you what it means to me to have her in my corner, and I'm sure you're friend will feel the same about you .

That's so hard and I hope your friend gets some support.
So emotionally draining for you. No right or wrong. Don't think about what to do tomorrow just now. Try and rest tonight and you can decide in the morning. If you don't feel up to work, totally understandable. You need time to process what's happened. I hope you have someone you can speak too also when you feel ready x

Totally NBU to need to take some time out. I am assuming your friend is in a safe space now, so now take some time for you. You can tell your boss something traumatic happened that you need to process.

I have just spent time with very good friends consoling them about losing their daughter who DID jump off a bridge last night and tragically died. I am in pieces. They are in pieces. You need the day off tomorrow. Absorbing something like you did last night is awful. Well done for being a brilliant friend and I am so glad your friend lives. 💖

You are the friend everyone wishes they had. I'm so sorry you had such a hard evening. I'd contact the office tonight if possible and let someone know you'll not be in, but you'll phone after lunchtime to check in.
A nice hot shower/bath soft clothes and some easy light tv & bed.
You are a good person x

It’s so hard to be the person who talks someone off the ledge, literally in your case. You have such a mix of emotions from the adrenaline rush of the event to the horrible ‘what ifs’ because it could have ended differently. I’ve been there and it takes so much out of you. You need to give yourself time to allow space for all these feelings. If you can, take tomorrow off, have a handy bout of D and V if needed. Hugs to you and your friend.

Definitely day off but try not to be alone and do something nice.

OP you have experienced a very traumatic event. Although there wasn’t a fatal outcome, you must at times have thought there would be. That is a traumatic place to be and you must take some care of yourself. I can’t imagine anyone would tell you to pull yourself together. Do whatever you need to do.

You have done an amazing thing.
You need time off to process what happened tonight.
Please stay at home tomorrow doing whatever makes you happy.
I do hope your friend and you will both go on to many more years of friendship. Life is precious.

OP, I volunteer for the Samaritans. The very first thing we are taught in training is we need to look after ourselves too. It we have a bad call or something we find difficult, we are supposed to offload, to our shift leader, a colleague or others who can listen. I'd like you to know that if YOU need to offload, you can offload to us. 116123 is our number and we are here for you whenever you need to talk, if you feel that you do. You're amazing

@ContactTraced You’re a great friend OP ❤️ I really hope your friend is getting the help she needs now
I would send an email to your boss tonight explaining what has happened then wait and see how you feel I’m the morning about going in to work. You may decide you’d rather have the distraction of it or you may decide you need a day or 2 to process what has happened. There’s no right or wrong here - just do what you feel you need to. Look after yourself!

As SunscreenCentralsays, You are a good person. You should definitely phone in tomorrow and explain briefly the reason and take some time out. You've been extremely brave. We'll done you for being an excellent friend. Wish you and your vulnerable friend well and hope she can get professional help with her problems. 🙏

You sound like an amazing friend. Be kind to yourself. Allow yourself time to process what you've experienced.

I would stay at home, in bed or wrapped up on the sofa with a brew.

What a tragic evening. I’m sorry for your friend and hope she gets better. And you must have some kind of shock reaction too, understandably. This might sound weird, but have a cuppa with lots of sugar, that’s what they do in police stations when someone had a traumatic experience.

Be kind to yourself, sleep is good too if you can.