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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu to expect my clients to stay out of the way?

161 replies

Tootsey11 · 27/09/2021 16:55

I'm a cleaner, I have a number of clients who are WFH. All men. Their wives all assured me that 'they will keep out of the way' while I am cleaning. They don't. All the cleans are 2 hours so not a long time. But they all are up and down stairs, toilet breaks, coffee making, lunch making, just getting a drink, I'm meeting them on the stairs, I'm hoovering and turn round and they are there. Am I wrong to be fed up with it. Why can't anyone just set themselves up where they are working and stay there until I leave. These are all pre booked appointments so they know when I am due round.

If you wfh do you constantly get in the cleaners way.

OP posts:
BasiliskStare · 27/09/2021 17:57

Oh & one more point DH is WFH at the moment - he often has 5 min between phone calls or zoom to get a coffee / glass of water - that is when it has to happen. I do not think that is entitled male wankery - just practical. - OK he could take a bottle of water up but not coffee . Equally he would never complain if he leaves footprints on a newly mopped floor. Give and take.

PearlclutchersInc · 27/09/2021 18:04

Nope you're not BU. We get sorted before she arrives, breakfasted/coffeed/toileted etc (3 hour clean) We do have two bathrooms and use the one on the floor where she's not working.

I love seeing a spick n span house before I muck it all up again Smile

RickJames · 27/09/2021 18:18

Years ago when I had a cleaner I'd just let her get on if I was at home but then I realised she liked chatting, so I'd help her shift the sofas etc. She was really nice and I enjoyed it when we were there together. I'd always make her a cup of tea and get her a few biscuits or a slice of cake at some point during the visit. She had excellent chatting skills and had loads of scandals in her family and friendship group to report.

Of course, I can read a room and if she'd been stand-offish I'd have carried on leaving her in peace. She was great. She'd always leave money or my ex's cannabis that she'd found in the sofa cushions in a little pile with her receipt!

Sadly, at my age, I'm always suspicious of men and in your position I'd be annoyed too. I find even the most decent men are a bit attention seeking when they have a captive female audience. I'm not saying they have designs on you, I just think they seek feedback and attention. Male entitlement some might say.

BasiliskStare · 27/09/2021 20:47

I do think a lot of men WFH are not attention seekers . DH for an example

Chilver · 27/09/2021 20:52

I WFH when my cleaner is here. I call out 'hi' if i'm on a call and stay in my office until she is gone (3hrs). If I don't have meetings, I leave for a walk for 30 mins. I have only ever once had to go to the toilet when she is here (18 months of cleaner/ wfh) and I apologised profusely!!

Mamainthemaking · 27/09/2021 20:54

I’ve only been home twice when my cleaner has been here and I locked myself in a room she doesn’t clean. My husband is always here and always keeps out of her way. Really don’t get why someone wouldn’t understand that you need space to do your job.

Perhaps send out a generic email to everyone explaining what you expect of them i.e. being out of the way. See if that helps.

Margotshypotheticaldog · 27/09/2021 20:57

They get a kick out of feeling like the big Lord Bollocks of the Manor trampling over a scullery maid. Wankers.
🤣

SalsaLove · 27/09/2021 20:58

We stay out of her way. My DH stays in his office down at the end of the garden and I’m usually at work.

Margotshypotheticaldog · 27/09/2021 20:59

I agree BTW, this is the most likely explanation. When my kids were small they would do this, walk around behind me undoing all the cleaning /tidying I had done. It gave me the absolute rage.

Duchess379 · 27/09/2021 22:06

I have cleaners - I stay in one room & keep out the way. It's not that hard!

MrsRobbieHart · 27/09/2021 22:14

Totally agree with you OP. Very hard to work around people who are constantly moving around.

I cleaned for a client last week who had a tradesman, and all his tools, in while I was there. Ladders in the hallway, drilling that sent dust everywhere. I mean what’s the sodding point of me being there at the same time? The guy was literally dirtying the surfaces I was cleaning. Confused

MrsRobbieHart · 27/09/2021 22:16

Another clients father arrived as I was cleaning and proceeded to follow me around the house for a chat as I was working. Confused get out of my flipping way you idiot!

MrsRobbieHart · 27/09/2021 22:18

I will commend one man I clean for. Not WFH but retired. He is a stealth ninja. As soon as he senses me coming towards a room he is in he disappears himself. I think he walks through walls.

avamiah · 27/09/2021 22:26

@MrsRobbieHart

I will commend one man I clean for. Not WFH but retired. He is a stealth ninja. As soon as he senses me coming towards a room he is in he disappears himself. I think he walks through walls.
Thats the way it should be to be honest or they are wasting your time and their money.

I had a lady who cleaned for me many years ago a couple of hours a week, she did downstairs on one day and upstairs the next day and that worked out well.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 27/09/2021 22:42

Generally I stay out of their way - obviously I’d go to the loo if I really needed to, but basically keep out of the way.

Very much male entitlement- an abiding belief that whatever they are doing is more important than whatever women are doing.

imageforu · 27/09/2021 23:19

Opposite problem in our house, cleaner comes and expects a half hour sit down and a lengthy chat. YABU, you need to be able to work around people whose homes you are working in.

Seboqueen · 27/09/2021 23:36

Yes I’ve had this. Some did this because they didn’t see a problem with trotting in and out.

Some appeared to do this deliberately,: they’d try to engage me in nonsensical, contradictory chitchat, walk across wet floors, sidle up beside me during lockdown 2 etc. These individuals were on some kind of weird power trip.

It’s an unpleasant feeling when you realise they’re right behind you and you can’t hear them approaching because the vacuum is on.

Is it worth advertising again so you can offload those who are hell bent on ignoring your requests?

Tootsey11 · 28/09/2021 08:04

I can replace them all easily, I just thought I was making too big an issue out of it and should put up with it. Clearly I'm not.

When you put a routine in place in a house which ensures you get all done well and finished on time, it is very difficult then to start stop do a bit here shift to there, it messes everything up and things get missed.

OP posts:
SD1978 · 28/09/2021 08:06

I would keep out your way- easier for you to do why you need to do and no need for akward conversation. This would irritate me mildly.

IamnotSethRogan · 28/09/2021 08:10

Well I often need the toilet when my cleaner is here. I can really help that. I make tea for both of us a couple time. She generally comes at a time that works for her so sometimes I do need to grab a bit of food! We do tend to chat while she's here but generally I move out of the room I'm working in, she cleans it then I'm back in

KingsleyShacklebolt · 28/09/2021 08:12

DH is working from home on the day the cleaner is here. He does stay in his office - mostly - but banning toilet breaks or making a cup of tea for 3 hours is a bit unreasonable, isn't it?

ThinWomansBrain · 28/09/2021 08:16

I get that deciding to get lunch when you're in the middle of cleaning is a bit off - but dictating people can't use the loo seems OTTHmm

angieloumc · 28/09/2021 08:19

My cleaner comes at 8.30 am (on the dot every time) so if im WFH I make us both of cup of tea while she whizzes through my study, then I go in there to keep out of her way. Same if my DD or DS are home. It's not nice feeling like someone is hovering while you're working.

Singlebutmarried · 28/09/2021 08:23

Put your prices up/do less

When asked why just get them to as their DP

WaltzingBetty · 28/09/2021 08:38

@ThinWomansBrain

I get that deciding to get lunch when you're in the middle of cleaning is a bit off - but dictating people can't use the loo seems OTTHmm
OP hasn't. She's simply surprised that they feel compelled to use the loo she is cleaning when others are available. That's not unreasonable
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