Mum’s comments about my pregnant body

[Notsure397]

My mum has made quite a few comments about my body during pregnancy, usually around how “huge” my bump is. She did the same thing to my sister while she was pregnant, and my sister recently told me that my mum often speaks to my her about how my body now looks, making jokes etc.

I’m quite far along now so possibly the hormones are making me over sensitive, but yesterday something really bothered me. My mum said that I’m “so big” that I must be making my sister feel much better about herself. I didn’t like this for two reasons, first because I feel the comments about my body are unnecessary and secondly because it feels like trying to play my sister and I off against each other.

Often I just tend to ignore these comments or brush them off - at the time I casually said “yes, this is what someone looks like at “x” weeks pregnant.” Afterwards I felt frustrated that I hadn’t just called her out on this, so I decided to send her an online article “why you shouldn’t comment on pregnant women’s bodies” with a comment saying “this is a really good article ☺️”. A bit passive aggressive I appreciate, but I don’t know if IABU. Would probably be better to sit down and talk to her about it.

As background, my mum is very insecure about her body and I think maybe these comments are how she tries to feel better about herself.

Sorry for the essay! Thanks in advance

Oh my goodness I know how you feel. I used to be rude back - someone told me she thought I was going to give birth any day when I was 20 weeks, then when I said I wasn't she acted all surprised like maybe my dates were wrong. So next time I saw her I congratulated her on her own pregnancy because of her oh so obvious bump and when she denied it I encouraged her to get a test. I was so sick of the comments and she'd been particularly rude.
My FIL also liked to comment on how enormous I was. Also I had random comments from colleagues about my size and when I said no I wasn't about to pop, no it's not twins and so on, it's like they expect you to justify it 'oh gosh I'm just carrying a lot of water' or 'baby must be in a funny position' because clearly your body is the problem, not their inability to look at your size and guess dates (or better yet shut up).
I hated so much how my body felt like public property when I was pregnant.
If I was you I would start making personal comments back, like 'oh yes when I've had the baby we can diet together because you've put on a lot too haven't you' or 'at least I'll lose the weight when baby is here, but you're stuck with those wrinkles'.
Hopefully someone more mature will be along in a minute with a sensible suggestion, but for now have sympathy and 💐.