Pri school expect too much involvement from parents

[LoomBoom]

Outer London state school. Constantly holding daytime events, talks, teacher meetings, parent reading mornings, a lot of calls for volunteering... tonnes of home learning and way too many class discos. Dh and I never had any of this crap growing up and we went to top schools. I feel guilty I'm always last to pick up kids from after school club. Maybe I'm being sensitive but it almost feels discriminatory to every working parent? I have no issue with sahp, my best friends are sahms. But surely the majority of households have 1.5 or 2 FT working parents these days? School seems to think every child has a sahm. I enjoy the annual sports day, end of term performance, evening events like fireworks or fundraisers. Will always try to go, but the rest I miss out on and annoys me.

There’s no obligation to attend these things. I don’t see the issue. If other parents can make these events, great. I wouldn’t be able too. Even if I could I’d probably skip some of them…
As you say these didn’t used to exist, so why are you bothered about missing it? I’m a bit confused by you calling it ‘crap’ but then also having this FOMO about it.

You're right I don't know if it's fomo or it's unnecessary. Some I don't mind skipping, but some like parents reading or talks opportunities to speak to department heads directly, I don't like missing out on.

Disco is definitely crap and I hate that they do it, that's probably more a PTA thing so not the school

I suppose the home learning is another peeve of mine.

It's just different to school when we were growing up

Yes my DC asked why I didn't go to their art exhibition and "purchase" theirs. Everybody else's art was bought. Made me feel a little sad.

I don't mean to stop all these things, but maybe just consider and be more mindful that many parents work, or juggle other commitments too. I have 3DCs and even for sports day it is x 3 different day or time slots... that might be a covid thing.

I agree. The teachers must hate it as well. My children expect me to as many things as possible as well.

Why do you hate the school discos?

You don't have to do it all - prioritise the things that matter to your kids. It would be a shame not to use the volunteer help from SAHMs because not everyone can do it. It drops off as they move up the school - reception sports day, we were all there (except the teacher parents - and their childminder was brilliant - she would attend sports day for the kids she minded, so they had someone there for them), but by year 5/6 there were only two or three. Likewise helping in the classroom - lots of mums did it in reception/year 1, and hardly any in KS2.

Schools can't win on homework, because there are always some who want more and some who want less. Ours had a great system of optional homework - there was a list of activities each term related to what they were studying, so that those who wanted to do it could do lots of it, and those who didn't could get by with something that took 10 minutes. Even better is if the after-school club takes on doing some of those activities with their charges.

Now that most teachers have learned the art of delivering teaching remotely, perhaps you could suggest that the "let us tell you about our phonics scheme" sessions and the like are recorded for those unable to attend during the day.