To block them?

[Sunshinedaisy1890]

Hi all,

I'm after some advice and opinions on what you would do in my situation!

I used to be very close to a couple of friends, we were involved in each others weddings, used to go on holidays together, I have kids which they were amazing with (they don't have any yet) I regarded them as best friends etc we got on so well.

Rewind to last year and we started drifting apart during lockdown despite trying to make efforts to meet up etc. We haven't actually spoken this year as I decided to stop trying and they haven't bothered to contact me.

Thing is, I have a social media page which they follow and watch intently, I have a fairly large following which helps me earn a small wage and so going private is not an option. However, since announcing some big changes in our lives (health situations etc) I've not had one message from them, yet they continue to watch everything I do.

It's starting to get me down and I have considered blocking them, but to be honest I feel childish in doing so!

So my question is, do I let them carry on and try and ignore how it makes me feel or do I just get rid?
I appreciate this may sound petty certainly for someone my age but appreciate any opinions to stop me going mad!

If you have a public social media presence and have monetised it you can't really get upset that when people view it.

OP, I think people are being too hard on you here. I completely get what you mean.

Yes, if your last few messages have gone unanswered and you haven't heard from them at all, I would limit them seeing my stories. To watch and not comment when you've announced something detrimental health wise is weird, they are not your friends.

Limit what they can see, why should they be able to see what you're up to and (probably) discuss it between themselves if they can't be bothered to actually be your friend.

I have someone in my life like this too, I don't think there's a story on Instagram of mine that they haven't watched (in fact they're normally the first to bloody view!) and yet they've never, in about 5 years ever commented. I don't particularly like them but can't easily cut them out of my life without causing WW3 (In-law) but I know I could write I have terminal cancer or something equally as horrific on there and they'd still just view it and that would be that, no message, nothing, weird.

I choose whose stories I watch, I don't let it just scroll through automatically on Instagram, so maybe I'm only seeing it from someone who actively chooses which content to watch.

@Battleoftheislands

OP, I think people are being too hard on you here. I completely get what you mean.

Yes, if your last few messages have gone unanswered and you haven't heard from them at all, I would limit them seeing my stories. To watch and not comment when you've announced something detrimental health wise is weird, they are not your friends.

Limit what they can see, why should they be able to see what you're up to and (probably) discuss it between themselves if they can't be bothered to actually be your friend.

I have someone in my life like this too, I don't think there's a story on Instagram of mine that they haven't watched (in fact they're normally the first to bloody view!) and yet they've never, in about 5 years ever commented. I don't particularly like them but can't easily cut them out of my life without causing WW3 (In-law) but I know I could write I have terminal cancer or something equally as horrific on there and they'd still just view it and that would be that, no message, nothing, weird.

I choose whose stories I watch, I don't let it just scroll through automatically on Instagram, so maybe I'm only seeing it from someone who actively chooses which content to watch.

Thank you so much for your response, it's nice to hear from someone that potentially sees this the way I do!

I should of perhaps mentioned that I had no intention of limiting or blocking them from any personal pages, just this page in question as I am a lot more active on there and talk about different issues due to the nature of the page although I'm not sure what difference there is, or what difference it would make.

You've hit the nail on the head there, there is more than one so it wouldn't surprise me if they are discussing things which to be honest I find the most hurtful out of everything.

Thank you for responding!

@Battleoftheislands

OP, I think people are being too hard on you here. I completely get what you mean.

Yes, if your last few messages have gone unanswered and you haven't heard from them at all, I would limit them seeing my stories. To watch and not comment when you've announced something detrimental health wise is weird, they are not your friends.

Limit what they can see, why should they be able to see what you're up to and (probably) discuss it between themselves if they can't be bothered to actually be your friend.

I have someone in my life like this too, I don't think there's a story on Instagram of mine that they haven't watched (in fact they're normally the first to bloody view!) and yet they've never, in about 5 years ever commented. I don't particularly like them but can't easily cut them out of my life without causing WW3 (In-law) but I know I could write I have terminal cancer or something equally as horrific on there and they'd still just view it and that would be that, no message, nothing, weird.

I choose whose stories I watch, I don't let it just scroll through automatically on Instagram, so maybe I'm only seeing it from someone who actively chooses which content to watch.

I agree with this post, I’ve been in a similar situation and felt really uncomfortable that they could make no effort to be present in my life but were still happy to be an onlooker. It feels a touch voyeuristic to me so I limited them from seeing my posts and I feel happier that I can control what I “share” with them.

Personally I wouldn’t block them. I know you are going through a tough time but the last 18 months has been really weird for everyone. I’m retired so my life has changed less than most people’s but I have still found everything difficult. They perhaps don’t know how to support you if they haven’t experienced what you are going through.
Perhaps just try and ignore them and revisit in the future when things have settled down.

I would block them from the page you mention. If they are interested in seeing what you write, they can message or call you.

Is it instagram? Can't you remove them as followers without actively blocking them? I would do that, I hate social media creepers.