I'm 40 with really poor mental health and I want another baby...

[Notgettingbetter]

It's a really bad idea, isn't it? I keep telling myself no but I still really, really want another baby 😢

Didn't intend to include voting.

Can your mental health be managed beforehand?

I'm working very hard to get better and seeing some slow improvement. Maybe I should wait a few more months then think again?

It's a pretty terrible idea. Do you feel like you want a baby to make you feel better? It's likely to do the opposite.

No, I expect it would be very hard.

Does your mental health affect your parenting?

What was the effect of having the last baby on your mental health?

I'm functioning. I don't think my mental health is having a terrible effect on my parenting but I'm sure I would struggle with two. Life was really tough when my daughter was a baby - she barely slept and cried a lot. But my mental health was better than it is now 🤷🏻‍♀️

Get yourself in the right place first and make sure you get all the support in place that you need.

Example, why have a special team of midwives that support me and perinatal mental health team and they’re all fantastic.

Yeah... Maybe I need to hang on a bit longer and keep working on being as well as possible. I guess I'm just worried about getting too old.

I don't think my mental health is having a terrible effect on my parenting but I'm sure I would struggle with two. Life was really tough when my daughter was a baby - she barely slept and cried a lot. But my mental health was better than it is now

You’ve said it yourself. You’re in a worse place with your mental health and you know you’d struggle. So please focus on getting yourself well and don’t bring another child into this right now.

I feel the same. I keep trying to forget about having another because since having my second and last, almost 5 years ago, my mental health has been so poor. Not sure id cope 😕 think you have to think about the long term effects it'll have. Work on making yourself better and focus on the child(ren) you do have. Big hugs.

It depends. If you have stress issues then a new baby is a very bad idea. IMHO.

I'm sorry you're having similar struggles Bobsburgers ❤️

Having 2 is far harder than having 1, if there's a smallish gap. I would seriously reconsider. Unless the gap is at least 3 years anyway. What effect does your mental health have on your existing child and how would it affect them if you got worse? Your existing child should be the number one priority here.

I just keep thinking I'm going to really regret not having another... But I know it could also make our lives so much worse... I guess I need to come to terms with not having any more 😞

My daughter is 4 and has just started school. She absolutely is my priority, which is why I keep telling myself no.