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Original poster

Tell me your hideous workplace errors

265 replies

BordelDeMerde · 20/09/2021 22:35

Today I was bitching about a colleague and accidentally sent him the messages I meant to send to the colleague I was bitching with. I referred to him as a 'mofo' in the messages.
Yes, it was incredibly childish and unprofessional and I'm mortified. I know, there's no need to tell me. I'm also very worried about the consequences.

I can't sleep because of it, so please cheer me up with your embarrassing work stories.
I promise I'm not the daily fail in poor disguise.

OP posts:
ZimZamZoom · 22/09/2021 11:56

I have a few!

One I still feel bad about was in my first job on leaving school - dental nurse. A lady was in agony with toothache and the dentist asked me to take a small x-ray of the offending tooth. It took a lot of cajoling into position and I managed to do this as gently as possible but it still caused the patient much pain.
Afterwards, I took the film packet out of the holder and.... just opened it in the daylight-filled room instead of putting it into the darkbox first, meaning the image would have been totally ruined.
I didn't have the heart to ask her to repeat it, so I sent her back through to the dentist and just told him that it didn't develop properly.

Another is more embarrassing than anything else. A consultant I worked for was going on a year long sabbatical. He emailed me his home address so that I could forward any non-clinical post to him. Nosey old me decides to put his home address into Google Maps and have a look at his house on Street View. I was full zoomed into the front of his house, when he appeared at my shoulder!! I tried to x the window off quickly but, as I had several tabs open, it did the whole "do you want to close all tabs?" message, leaving his house on screen for even longer. He said something along the lines of, "um, that's my house", to which I replied "lovely and close to the M1, aren't you?". Finally closed the damn screen and pretended none of it had happened.

I also came a cropper with a typo. Titled an email to a doctor with "telephone massage", he arrived in the office soon after pretending to have arrived for the massage he was promised. He kept that joke up for a long time too. Embarrassing and gross.

I often type God Morning or God afternoon on emails too 😂

niki26 · 22/09/2021 12:12

Working for a law firm and someone had sent their passport in for ID purposes (we tell them not to but that's not the point here...!!) so I was sending it back to him. Thought I'd help the office admin out by getting it ready and duly filled out the 'special delivery' book etc.

A week or so later I get an email from the client asking if I'd sent the passport back to him yet. I was a bit confused as he should have had it by now but responded saying I'd look into it as I had the barcode etc so could track it.

It transpired that I'd used the international delivery book and not the special delivery one! They were both silver and I hadn't noticed! I phoned the post office and they said it was probably at Gatwick.....they said there was no way for me to be able to now trace it. Oh my god I felt ill. I told the client and he was very kind about it but said he needed it as he was going away the next week on holiday!

After a few sleepless nights I called him again - he said 'oh yes - it arrived the day after we spoke! Thank you so much!' I was so relieved!

OnlySpam · 22/09/2021 12:24

Many years ago I worked in a department store in the menswear section. They sold expensive suits etc - think £400 +

It was in the days where when you took a card payment, you placed the card in a manual contraption thingy, placed a triplicate piece of paper over it and ran it back and forth - this copied the bank card details

Unfortunately - for some unknown reason, I got this wrong and was only producing the card details onto one bit of paper - the bit handed to the customer. We would then tuck the other two pieces into the till. I spent a full day doing this incorrectly and placing blank slips into the till - effectively giving away suits, shirts, suits ... you name it. Only picked up in the evening when the store closed.

We had to rely on honest customers coming back in a month or so later when they received their credit card statement and realised they'd not been charged. Funnily enough - no one did Grin

Oops

StealthPolarBear · 22/09/2021 12:29

Lol at the 'Dead david'. I once missed an important 'o' and sent an email starting "Hell David".
And it really was David!

JavaBurnReviews · 22/09/2021 12:31

This reply has been deleted

This post has been hidden until the MNHQ team can have a look at it.

Underamour · 22/09/2021 12:44

Any consequences OP? I once turned the lights on and fused the whole office. Was called “Scary Mary” for a little while after. I used to wonder if I had turned them on too hard or something. It was probably just hundred year old wiring though.

HildegardNightingale · 22/09/2021 12:45

Was mad busy in clinics, hadn’t had lunch and was trying to staff 3 clinics by myself.
Gave a patient an injection and then promptly shoved the needle into myself. Patient had a blood born virus.
Had a months course of anti-virals and was as sick as a dog. On the upside I lost over a stone in weight in that month.

Bloose · 22/09/2021 13:08

He said something along the lines of, "um, that's my house", to which I replied "lovely and close to the M1, aren't you?".

I am DYING!

FoxgloveSummers · 22/09/2021 13:20

I’ve sent several emails beginning “Dear Christ”

Makes me sound a lot more exasperated than I am. All the Chrises I work with must think I’m a real drama Queen.

CounsellorTroi · 22/09/2021 13:27

A relative used to be a lawyer in the City. He once had to reschedule a meeting because his briefcase jammed and he couldn’t get the documents out.

MydogWillow · 22/09/2021 13:32

Friend signed off an email to a customer as Retards instead of Regards....

CounsellorTroi · 22/09/2021 13:36

Way back when I first started working as a PA, I went down to reception to collect a visitor my boss was expecting, took him upstairs only to find I’d brought the wrong person up.

NotReallyAPrincess · 22/09/2021 13:47

@NothingIsWrong

Signed a drawing correct. It wasn't. Steel frame for a new school building arrived on site and some of the bits didn't fit. Like meccano with some of the bits the wrong length, cost about £10k to fix.

Everyone was lovely about it, I was 6 months pregnant, waddling around site in my high vis and hard hat trying not to cry when the bits wouldn't go together...

I live in fear of this happening to me
Original poster
BordelDeMerde · 22/09/2021 13:56

@underamour No consequences yet anyway!
I have considered apologising to him but as I'm still fucking raging with him, it would be a bit hollow. "I'm sorry you found out that I think you're a cunt." would probably not smooth things over much really. Grin

OP posts:
Strawbsaturno · 22/09/2021 14:02

Participating in a bad tempered inter department project meeting on Teams, think lots of finger pointing about things going wrong…. and my boss messaged me and a collègue saying ‘couldn’t organise a piss up in a brewery, absolutely useless these lot’.
Unfortunately they had forgotten my colleague was screen sharing at the time, and the message popped up for all participants to see.

ihavespoken · 22/09/2021 15:13

I sent our £1m VAT payment to the wrong account.. the first I heard of it was when HMRC's enforcement offer turned up at my company's reception!

Fortunately I'd sent it to another government account and we were able to retrieve it after a few weeks of to-ing and fro-ing, and the officer was very nice once he realised we hadn't tried to dodge the VAT bill, and were going to be able to pay it.

My boss wasn't that impressed though, however, I still work there and I now have his job Grin

Mama1980 · 22/09/2021 15:27

I once dropped a skull (first dig as a 'proper' qualified archaeologist) I could have cried I was absolutely mortified.
Luckily my boss was lovely, said it happens to everyone and helped me piece it back together.

EggSheeran · 22/09/2021 15:30

@NothingIsWrong Were you the architect then? So many of my drawings have been status A'ed and they were completely wrong. No one person is ever held accountable though - too many parties involved in the drawing approval process. I just get left with the shit to sort out!

Underamour · 22/09/2021 15:46

@BordelDeMerde- glad there haven’t been consequences. It sounds like it will all blow over.

Nocaloriesinchocolate · 22/09/2021 15:48

Asked someone when the baby was due - when she wasn’t pregnant. And in a situation in which I was in a position of power and she wasn’t so she couldn’t even tell me off

Shehasadiamondinthesky · 22/09/2021 15:57

Nhs podiatry, I called a patients name in the waiting room. And he got up and came into my room. Sat down and took his shoes and socks off as I asked. A very confusing conversation followed during which time I cut all his nails.
Eventually he asked if it was normal for nails to be cut before a hip xray.
It was the wrong patient. I always check now.

Glitttter · 22/09/2021 16:10

In my first full time job, I was sexting the guy I was sleeping with during work hours..
And sent a very explicit message to my boss by mistake. He never mentioned it, neither did I. It became a strange bubble of silence in our relationship until the day I left, when he insisted another staff member was present during my exit interview

minionsrule · 22/09/2021 16:22

This happened to a colleague but its made me really careful.
Tele conference with screenshare, call ends but person screensharing forgot to stop sharing after the call. She promptly starting messaging one of her colleagues to say the organiser really didn't seem to get what she was talking about.
Yep the organiser saw it all

prettyteapotsplease · 22/09/2021 16:41

We were switching from an old word processor system to a new and improved personal computer each. As I was considered patient, mature and careful, the task of laboriously transferring important old documents from the old to the new fell to muggins here.

I worked down the list carefully using a ruler to make the task easier so I could tick off each title as I went. Then, oops! I moved the ruler down the list and found out too late that the person who'd marked off each title had written 'do not delete' BENEATH it, not alongside or above as previously. As I was pissed off for being singled out to do this with little or no thanks (no-one else could be arsed) I just thought sod it and continued without fessing up. I never said anything and left soon afterwards - sometimes I wonder if it caused any kerfuffle but frankly they deserved it for taking me for granted.

picklesandgiggles · 22/09/2021 16:44

Oh god I still die thinking of mine! Was screensharing on a Teams meeting I was co-chairing with another manager, in front of 40+ colleagues. He was taking a lot of credit for a joint project we had delivered and I messaged a friend to say how he was bleating on about himself. Obviously as I screenshared the chat was still up with the message there. Never said a word and no one said anything to me but I lost sleep for days after that one Blush