Page 2 | Driving test aibu

Thisisthelifewevebeengiven · 2021-09-20T20:25:42+00:00

My DH failed his second driving test today and I am fuming (a little bit with him, but mainly with the woman who’s bloody fault it was 😡) It has been 2 years in the making with covid making things slower anyway, massive wait times for tests and issues with driving instructors (whole other thread). He failed because he had a major on an observation. He had to stop and wait for a car reversing into the road on a corner out of a property, all fine until he was ready to go again, he did his obs and in that time the woman behind him decided he was taking too long and pulled out from behind him to overtake him. The examiner had to tell him to stop ( he obv would have done but he saw her moving before dh did). That woman’s impatience and dangerous driving behind what was clearly a learner driver makes me so angry. He now has to retake his theory because it runs out in two weeks, there is a ten week wait on that and then a 24 week wait after that for another test. I could cry. Aibu to hate that woman with a passion?

mummypie17 · 21/09/2021 06:32

It is frustrating and totally understand. I was so mad when I failed and I did feel other drivers should have been more patient with a learner driver. However, since I've passed and have been driving for a while, I do think that ultimately the onus is on you to deal with these things. There are many inconsiderate drivers on the road.

TicTacHoh · 21/09/2021 06:37

As PP’s have said, the fail will be less about what happened, and more about how he handled it. You are expected to be able to deal quickly and safely with hazards. Hopefully he passes next time, but it’s essential people pass when they are safe to drive, regardless of time away from family spent learning, etc, so yabu.

whatagloriousthingtobe · 21/09/2021 06:54

I failed my first ever test yesterday on observation too. I was gutted but It was totally my fault, I should've noticed something that I just didn't and I got a major for it. It's just one of them things ! He's got to just rebook and try again. I've managed to rebook, it's not for another three months but I hope to get one sooner by checking every day. I might even get the app mentioned up thread !

Booknooks · 21/09/2021 06:59

As has been said, stuff like this happens all of the time and he failed as he didn't deal with it safely. If the instructor saw the woman before he did, if they hadn't intervened he would have likely had a scrape, and if she impatiently overtook he was possibly taking ages to move off.

Polkadots2021 · 21/09/2021 07:08

@Thisisthelifewevebeengiven

Really? kingsleyshacklebolt I am not a driver myself but pulling out of a queue of waiting cars whilst the road was clearing to overtake a learner driver on a corner who was obviously about to move as soon as safe to do so is not dangerous. I’m pretty sure she would have failed her test if she had been on one.

I'd curse the woman too!! You're totally right, she drove like crap and all the consequences had to be taken at the cost of huge hassle and money for your son. Isn't there an app that tells you about cancellations for tests? Might be worth getting that. I hear stories a lot about neighbours or whoever whose teens got a quick theory or whatever because of cancellations out the blue.

PheasantsNest · 21/09/2021 07:12

You are blaming the wrong person. Your DH obviously wasn't observant enough and didn't deal with the situation correctly. The examiner needs to know he can deal with situations in normal driving.

OhGiveUp · 21/09/2021 07:15

You don't drive yourself and you're fuming ( a bit ) with your husband for failing his test? You sound delightful.
A driving test is stressful enough without you fuming about a fail.
I feel sorry for your husband.

LadyPenelope68 · 21/09/2021 07:19

@Thisisthelifewevebeengiven

Aibu to hate that woman with a passion?

I agree with others, very toxic mindset. Maybe she pulled out because your DH had taken to long and was significantly delaying the flow if traffic and she was fed up of waiting.

Secondly, if the examiner had to tell him to stop as she was there, that suggests your husband hadn’t seen her quick enough, therefore isn’t a competent enough driver to pass his test.

I suggest you look at what he was doing incorrectly and he tried to improve that part of his driving and not blame other drivers.

NerrSnerr · 21/09/2021 07:19

@Simonjt read that PP's further replies. They've said what they mean (with good humour).

FixTheBone · 21/09/2021 07:23

My brother in law failed on something similar, except instead of a reversing car it was a stationary bus and he was waiting for a gap in oncoming traffic to overtake safely.

When the gap came, both he, and the person behind went to overtake - the other person going slightly sooner and faster.

The examiner failed him for impeding the other driver. He asked what would have happened if he'd waited and the other driver hadn't have pulled out, and was told he'd have been failed for not making progress along the route.

It's like car accidents, sometimes, it's not really anybody's fault, bad outcomes just happen.

Athers666 · 21/09/2021 08:12

Sorry that your DH failed OP, it is so disheartening having to go through it all again. However, honestly, one of the things the examiners are looking for is how you react to other people's (often bad/dangerous) driving. DH should have been aware what was going on all around him but he missed the car behind moving off so as frustrating as it is, it makes him seem like he isn't quite ready to be driving independently as his observations are not quite there yet. So even though what the woman did was annoying, stuff like that happens all the time on the roads and you need to be able to deal with it appropriately. So many people say they failed the test due to someone else's actions but that it just not true, it is all about how you react to any situation that might arise. And he didn't react appropriately. But he will get there, and when he does pass he will be a much better driver and truly ready for it.

nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut · 21/09/2021 09:25

Um I'm a driver and agree with OP. It was dangerous. You do not overtake a whole queue of traffic to dodge round an obstructing vehicle that is reversing. Don't condescend to her just because she doesn't drive herself. An idiot could see that was a stupid thing to do.

Fluffypastelslippers · 21/09/2021 09:51

@nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut

Um I'm a driver and agree with OP. It was dangerous. You do not overtake a whole queue of traffic to dodge round an obstructing vehicle that is reversing. Don't condescend to her just because she doesn't drive herself. An idiot could see that was a stupid thing to do.

It was his reaction, or lack of, that caused the failure.

Fluffypastelslippers · 21/09/2021 09:51

Posted too soon...

He didn't fail because of the woman's driving. He failed because of his own.

CheapFoodShits · 21/09/2021 09:52

Your DH isn't taking responsibility here. If the woman was behind him and being impatient, then she was there when he did his observations. If the examiner had to tell him to stop, that means he was already moving off which means he didn't do his observations correctly or move off quickly enough when he had the opportunity to go, leaving it so long the lady overtook him. Hesitation causes crashes. The lady isn't at fault, your husband is.

CheapFoodShits · 21/09/2021 09:56

@nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut

Um I'm a driver and agree with OP. It was dangerous. You do not overtake a whole queue of traffic to dodge round an obstructing vehicle that is reversing. Don't condescend to her just because she doesn't drive herself. An idiot could see that was a stupid thing to do.

OP never once said the lady overtook a "whole queue of traffic" and the person reversing had already done so, which is why OP's DH was going to move off. No-one is being condescending, it's not a difficult post to follow, it's sheer common sense if you drive. OP doesn't which is why her DH is trying to pin this on the woman who overtook him. Probably because driving tests/driving lessons in general are bloody expensive and he feels like a tit for messing up.

dottiedodah · 22/09/2021 07:10

I feel for your dh.however dick drivers are everywhere sadly. Its the reason you have a test! The week after passing my test, a dog ran out in front of me.all those emergency stops suddenly came into their own .the examiner would have expected dh to notice the woman first.no worries on and upwards. He just needs more practice is all

Booknooks · 22/09/2021 09:43

@nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut

Um I'm a driver and agree with OP. It was dangerous. You do not overtake a whole queue of traffic to dodge round an obstructing vehicle that is reversing. Don't condescend to her just because she doesn't drive herself. An idiot could see that was a stupid thing to do.

Yes it was stupid and dangerous of the woman, but part of the test and driving in general is how you react and respond to other people on the roads, many who do drive wrecklessly like this woman.

lockdownmadnessdotcom · 22/09/2021 09:49

Unfortunately passing your test is often a question of luck.

When I did my test I was doing my reverse around a corner and a woman decided to cross the road right behind me. I stopped, said to the examiner I'd start again, drew forward and then started the reverse again. I passed, but she could have really thrown me off.

When my son did his first test he was on a stretch of road where you join a road in the righthand lane. He didn't move over quickly enough to the left and someone undertook him (happens all the time actually - people see you joining from the right but won't give you time). He failed, which seemed quite unfair to me, but he passed next time around. But had he not been undertaken he would have probably moved over and passed!

Drivers can be horrible to learners, and overtaking in the scenario the OP outlines is a ridiculous thing to do.

Fluffypastelslippers · 22/09/2021 09:53

Unfortunately passing your test is often a question of luck.

It's nothing to do with luck and everything to do with ability.

When I did my test I was doing my reverse around a corner and a woman decided to cross the road right behind me. I stopped, said to the examiner I'd start again, drew forward and then started the reverse again. I passed, but she could have really thrown me off.

This was not luck. This was about your reaction. You saw the hazard, stopped and then redid your manoeuvre. Normal.

When my son did his first test he was on a stretch of road where you join a road in the righthand lane. He didn't move over quickly enough to the left and someone undertook him (happens all the time actually - people see you joining from the right but won't give you time). He failed, which seemed quite unfair to me, but he passed next time around. But had he not been undertaken he would have probably moved over and passed!

He did not move over. He left a gap and someone undertook him. He failed. This had nothing to do with luck and everything to do with his not moving over quickly enough. If he was sat in the wrong lane long enough to be undertaken it's likely he would have failed regardless of the person actually undertaking him. It's his driving being assessed, not anyone else's.

HarrietsChariot · 22/09/2021 10:13

He failed because of his own actions. He needs to notice what's going on around him before or at least at the same time as the instructor.

Whether other motorists act badly or not, the pupil needs to react promptly and appropriately. He didn't, or didn't quickly enough.

Blossomtoes · 22/09/2021 10:17

@KingsleyShacklebolt

It's not dangerous driving to overtake someone. I'm sorry your DH failed but there's no "blame" here.

There is. If you can see the car in front has stopped for a reason, you wait for it to move on and stay behind it. There’d be far fewer accidents if people weren’t so ridiculously impatient.

SilverViking · 22/09/2021 11:13

Sorry to hear DH failed his driving test.

You are NBU for it to annoy you for a time.

You are BU for trying to aportion blame and holding on to negative feelings about DH, the other driver and/or examiner.

Today is a new day... nobody got hurt, you can't change the past, shit happens and you can't control or be responsible for everything.

Best to put all you energy into encouraging DH and helping him where possible to resolve the situation in front of you.... after all, you would not want to contribute to DH being more nervous next time he takes the test.

Best of luck to DH next time!

Kite22 · 22/09/2021 21:08

Yes it was stupid and dangerous of the woman,

We don't actually know that though.
I read that the OP's dh was waiting behind someone who was reversing, then he didn't move off when the road was clear. The driver behind may have had a very clear stretch of road and the space and time to go past a hazard in the road (the OP's dh). We don't know. We weren't there. We have an emotional response by a non-driver to a report of something that happened given by a disappointed person who had just failed their test and was quite naturally looking for someone to blame.
It is all understandable, but there is a lot of "perspective" in the reporting.

TractorAndHeadphones · 22/09/2021 21:33

Hahahhaa ‘toxic’ what an overreaction. YANBU OP. We can all tell that you don’t mean that.

If she was overtaking on a junction (as the property was on a corner?) then it was dangerous.
She did nothing wrong if there was clear road ahead of your DH or she was actually far enough behind to go around him. However - I fail to see how she could have overtaken if she was in the normal waiting position as she would have to go very close to the car in front. Unless she gave him a wider following distance.
Unfortunately any situation that results in examiner intervention is an automatic fail. No matter whose fault it is.

That’s why people suggest taking tests when it’s quiet. Or on a less busy test route. Far far easier to pass.

I have my test next btw and totally understand the frustration. I’ll have spent thousands of pounds by this point (probably enough for a bloody house deposit) just because of the uncertainty around test times. And unlike written exams you must keep driving throughout or else you’ll forget.

But keep at it he will get there! Not uncommon to have 2 or more attempts among my peers to pass