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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it’s not *that* weird to only have one car?

184 replies

OnlyTheLangOfTheTitberg · 20/09/2021 17:21

At lunchtime today I was chatting to a colleague who asked if I was going to an (optional) event in the office on Wednesday. For context, we’re currently hybrid working, 2 office days/3 WFH days each week and as one of the managers (albeit not too high up the seniority tree) I get to manage which days are which myself, with sensitivity to the needs of the business of course.

I said I would have quite liked to have been there but my car is booked in for a repair on Wednesday so I’ve had to make it a WFH day. She immediately said “can you not just use your husband’s car that day?” I said we only have one car and she said “oh” and looked quite nonplussed, as if I’d suddenly started speaking in tongues, and there was a long pause where it looked like she genuinely didn’t know how to respond to my shocking revelation Grin I asked her if she was going and the conversation moved on, so I thought. But then as she was about to go back to her desk she hesitated, and then said “so what does your husband do if he needs to go somewhere while you’re at work?” so it was obviously playing on her mind. I just said, we manage (as it happens he’s disabled so no longer drives but she doesn’t need to know the ins and outs of his medical history, and even if he were still driving we couldn’t afford to run two cars) but it got me thinking…is it so unusual to only have one car between a couple these days?

OP posts:
PhoboPhobia · 20/09/2021 18:31

We always had 2 cars when the DCs were younger but went down to one about 2 years ago. We manage fine.

DH rarely needs the car during the working day and I wfh a lot. If I think I’m going to need the car in the day I take him to work or he walks round to a colleague who lives 5 minutes away occasionally and gets a lift.

Lately I have had the car a lot as MIL is poorly so I visit during the day. Also DS started college and the trains can be hit and miss here sometimes so I am available if he gets stranded somewhere.

I dreaded only having one car but it has been a piece of cake. I can get the bus if I want to go into the office although it’s a bit expensive. Weird that your colleague can’t get her head round a fairly simple concept!

yoyo1234 · 20/09/2021 18:32

@Sparklehead : We have one car, and try to use it as less as possible for environmental reasons. We are lucky in that we can both bike to work and the kids walk up a school. In this era of climate change, I thinks it’s everyone’s responsibility use their cars as least as they possibly can. Most of my friends are also one car families.

I agree with you

Mynameismargot · 20/09/2021 18:33

We only have one car. I work from home, dh works 5mins away so can walk. One kid gets the bus to school, the other kids school is 5 mins walk away. 99% of the time it isn't an issue and it isn't worth the expense of a 2nd car for the 1% of the time it would be handy.

Happyface120 · 20/09/2021 18:35

Nope, not odd. We live rurally, 2DC about 8-9 miles from both mine and DH work, amd 6 miles from DCs school. We take it in turns to cycle to work whilst the other takes kids in, when weather is good we drop kids bikes in school and then the cycling adult collects them. Sometimes one of us will cycle in then run home, and the next day do it the other way around.. Works really well for fitting in exercise. Whoever has car is responsible for kids clubs in evenings

FastFood · 20/09/2021 18:36

I have a grand total of 0 car.
But I have a push bike, two train stations, a billion buses and DLR / overground not far.

I'd say its a bit surprising to have just one car when you're so reliant on it that you wouldn't be able to go to work without it, but with flexible working its less of an issue I guess

irregularegular · 20/09/2021 18:36

We have one car, and try to use it as less as possible for environmental reasons. We are lucky in that we can both bike to work and the kids walk up a school. In this era of climate change, I thinks it’s everyone’s responsibility use their cars as least as they possibly can

It isn't necessarily less environmentally friendly to have two cars. We use less fuel since we bought the smaller more efficient car and use that most of the time. We'd struggle with just the small car. So the choice is big car, or big AND small. And I think the second is probably more environmentally friendly for us?

PhoboPhobia · 20/09/2021 18:37

I wonder what she’d think of my adult DD who has no intention of learning to drive?!

ABCDEF1234 · 20/09/2021 18:39

I can't think of anyone (family, friends, neighbours) that don't have 2 cars. I know I would really struggle if we were restricted to only one car (and I wfh 100% and hubby 80%).

arrangeyourface · 20/09/2021 18:40

DH and I have three cars but are about to go down to two. We’ve considered having one between us but it wouldn’t work due to conflicting demands of things we need to do/places we need to be.

For example, two nights a week, DH attends a thing in a different area not served well enough by public transport to get there in time. Those nights I have gym classes and there is no public transport to the gym. Walking or cycling isn’t an option because of the times I finish work versus start times of classes.

If you’re in a location well covered by public transport and you don’t have conflicting requirements then one car is perfectly normal. The reality is that many couples aren’t in that position.

Your colleague is weird for being weird about it though.

MatildaIThink · 20/09/2021 18:40

I don't know any couples (apart from the odd ones who do not drive) who live outside of Central London who do not have two cars as pretty much everywhere else public transport is awful.

Minionbums · 20/09/2021 18:41

We’ve got one car, for money and environmental reasons. But we also have access to my FIL’s car and borrow that when we need 2 cars, which is happening more often now. But I’d do anything to avoid buying a second. I can think of plenty of things I’d rather spend the money on. But to echo a PP - it’s a status thing for a lot of people, and that isn’t my thing really.

elbea · 20/09/2021 18:42

If you lived in a city I can’t see it would matter. I’ve lived very rurally (i.e 25 minute drive to the nearest shop, mile long dirt track drive), I’d be completely marooned without a car.

Theriband · 20/09/2021 18:42

She's a twat. Give her an uppercut next time you see her.

MatildaIThink · 20/09/2021 18:42

@PhoboPhobia

I wonder what she’d think of my adult DD who has no intention of learning to drive?!
Most people tend to think of that as a bit odd. Someone might not need to drive now, but it will almost certainly be useful qt some point, at least for the next 10-20 years until fully driverless cars are implemented.
ShanghaiDiva · 20/09/2021 18:44

We have one and manage fine. We can walk 25 mins to post office, doctor, dentist, shops, cafes and train station and 5 mins walk to bus stop. We do a combination of walking, public transport and car.

dworky · 20/09/2021 18:47

Wait till she finds out some people manage without any cars, particularly in cities.

ClareBlue · 20/09/2021 18:57

Personal transport is a privaledge of rich societies that is destroying the planet, so it should be weird that people think households should even have more that one car, if even that. What is weird is how much we except climate disasters across the world to make sure we don't have to be inconvenienced by sharing transport systems or organizing our days and prioritising our options to reduce our impacts.
Everyone always has valid reasons why it shouldn't be them, why their time is so important not to use public transport, why they have the job that needs personal transport, etc etc.
How many households actually need two cars or is it just not convenient to not have them.
The answer to your question is it is not weird and hopefully one day soon the exact opposite will be the case

ClareBlue · 20/09/2021 19:02

@MatildaIThink

I don't know any couples (apart from the odd ones who do not drive) who live outside of Central London who do not have two cars as pretty much everywhere else public transport is awful.
This is just not true. Public transport is not aweful outside central London. You might have to organize your travel and maybe sometimes wait and be inconvenienced, but you can move between all centers of population in England by public transport. There are very few population settlements of over 1000 people you can not connect to using public transport and people continually saying it is aweful is part of the problem.
Catra · 20/09/2021 19:07

We don't have any cars car - we can get to everywhere essential on foot or by public transport so can't justify the expense. Occasionally we'll hire a car for a few days if we want to go somewhere further afield.

SciFiScream · 20/09/2021 19:08

We only have one car. Not unusual here. I know lots of families that only have one car.

We could do with a second car once a week but are resisting as long as possible because even on a busy day the car is parked/stationary for 22 hours a day!

What a waste eh? It's either parked at home or parked at work.

BoreiPuriHagafen · 20/09/2021 19:09

We have zero cars. Luckily we are all able-bodied and public transport exists.

TheGrumpyGoat · 20/09/2021 19:09

@MatildaIThink

I don't know any couples (apart from the odd ones who do not drive) who live outside of Central London who do not have two cars as pretty much everywhere else public transport is awful.
We both drive, live a long way from London and only have one car because the public transport is good 🤷🏻‍♀️
BoreiPuriHagafen · 20/09/2021 19:10

@MatildaIThink

I don't know any couples (apart from the odd ones who do not drive) who live outside of Central London who do not have two cars as pretty much everywhere else public transport is awful.
We don't have any cars and it's not because we can't drive. We do not live in central London.
KnobblyWand · 20/09/2021 19:11

We don't drive and have three children and two jobs between us. We'd probably blow her mind.

CraftyGin · 20/09/2021 19:12

When one of our cars goes, we won't be replacing it. I am happy to bus/uber, or even walk.