To think having covid messes with you psychologically?

[Hatsuma]

I am out of isolation today having had covid, and I feel shell-shocked, like I’ve been through an ordeal that I can’t really put into words.

A friend caught it at the same time and so we’ve been talking every day, and he feels the same. It’s been completely different to having any other virus, although physically the symptoms were no worse than a bad cold or flu, it’s just been gruelling getting through it.

I think for me it was every day just feeling the exact same, too feeble to get out of bed to get a drink, my head pounding, loss of smell and taste, confused and dizzy. It really felt like it would never end, with other viruses usually there’s some kind of change for better or worse day to day but this was a solid week of just feeling exactly the same, and then it lifted.

Both my friend and I have had some really dark moments mentally with it. My low point was I think Wednesday night when I woke up from a nightmare which triggered my PTSD in a way that hasn’t happened for years, and meant I couldn’t sleep for the rest of the night. I’ve had a lot of weird/vivid/bad dreams since I got ill. With other viruses I’ve had, I’ve known that I am physically fucked but my brain has been happy to just wait for my body to recover, but it really felt like covid got into my head too.

Am I talking complete cobblers or does covid affect your mind as well as your body? I’m not sure I’ve explained it too well, like I say it’s hard to find the right words.

I don’t think for me it had anything to do with the hype, I was the most blasé person about covid, very much took the attitude that if I got it I got it, and it wouldn’t be anything to worry about. At no point was I scared I might end up in hospital or die, it just put my mind in a really dark place. When I had my non sleeping night I was convinced something awful was going to happen and dragged myself out of bed to check all the doors were locked. I was too scared to sleep, and there was no reason for it.

Interesting that PPs talk about hallucinations, my friend who has been ill said he has been suffering with those.

You are not wrong, OP. I have not had covid myself, but I remember seeing a news article on the psychological impact of the virus, and an astonishing number of people experienced mental health issues as a result of getting covid. So it seems to be a known problem. I hope you feel better soon.

@MatildaIThink Pass the blood brain barrier or affect the brain in some ways, haven’t they said it can?

For me it was the length of time it went on for and the not knowing if I would start to improve or if I would deteriorate.

I knew people could suddenly take a turn for the worse so for around 3 weeks of illness I was also just waiting to see if I would get more ill rather than better. It's a very long and frightening time. It just took so long to start to feel any better.

I also remember crying to DH asking him when would we know we were going to be safe. He didn't know how to answer.

We have all recovered now but I can still remember the fear of it all.

[quote Memoriesofanoldlife]@MatildaIThink Pass the blood brain barrier or affect the brain in some ways, haven’t they said it can?[/quote]
There has been preliminary research that showed in some limited cases it was possible, but nothing shows that it happens in anything but an extreme minority of cases, probably only in extremely immunocompromised individuals.

In general a viral infection in the brain does not cause "dark thoughts", it causes death.

YANBU - it does mess with you psychologically. Plus the lockdown, plus the risk of long covid. Don't underestimate how much the uncertainty effects you. It really does.

Now here comes the chip on the shoulder bit...

I have a long term health condition (pre-covid) so I'm a CEV shielder. Wow, I've never felt so disposable to society during covid despite being a full time worker/youngish person. It was astonishing how many people wrote me off as economy collateral damage. Now so many more people are seeing how much a chronic illness impacts on their life (and hopefully temporarily) I hope those who have conditions and disabilities get more recognition for their courage and strength getting up and doing what they have to do every day. I'm literally astounded that people talk about their fatigue and how the virus has impacted on their life when I've hidden any struggle as I know The admission will get others to discriminate against me. It's really shook me how much damage I'm inflicting on myself to look normal. I'm even hopeful that long covid clinics can lead to much more joined up nhs care. Unlikely, but you never know. All the best for your recovery OP

I wonder I read your post about racing mind and covid! I’m going through exactly that rn!! Did things eventually pass with you? Did you start sleeping again?!! Thanks

I have exactly this! Did it last long?