Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To consider taking my children out of school an hour early once a week so that they can go to a swimming lesson?

137 replies

PineNutsAreOverpriced · 18/09/2021 10:30

Just that really. Year 4 twins and a year 6. Weren’t strong swimmers before lockdown and still aren’t now - although they can mostly stay afloat there is still a lot of doggy paddling going on especially from the younger ones.

Previous swimming teacher has moved away. All local teachers and swimming schools are full up after school for lessons and have waiting lists for “sometime in 2022”

But I could get them into a lesson at 2.30pm during the week, on a day I am not working. I can get them there if I pick up at 2.15pm (school finishes at 3pm)

I think I probably would be unreasonable but am considering this.

School does not provide swimming lessons for the year 4s - there was a week course (one session a day) for my year 6 at the beginning of the year but that will be it for the year.

I’m not sure how the head will react if I ask.

Also, we do take them swimming as a family but can’t seem to get them to take it seriously the way they did with lessons. One has dyspraxia and tends to hang off me in the pool, which doesn’t help the situation.

OP posts:
bigknickersbigknockers · 18/09/2021 10:53

YABU because you live near the beach and you haven't had your children in swimming lessons sooner. Why on earth have you not done this sooner?

LindaEllen · 18/09/2021 10:55

It's illegal for a start.

There must be somewhere they can go if you're that desperate for lessons, or even a private tutor.

CalamityJaneDoe · 18/09/2021 10:55

BUt be forewarned, flexischooling is something a school can say no to and you may need to provide an educational plan for what you I’ll Ben doing at home

clary · 18/09/2021 11:00

Sorry OP but you know you are not OK to do this. For so many reasons. School is important and this is not sending a good message to the DC. They will miss important work. Other parents will want to do the same.

I would just wait till 2022 (which after all is only three months away). You have waited this long for them to learn to swim, a few months won't make that much difference.

Agree re idea of intensive course - one of mine really made progress during a half term week of 30 mins lesson a day.

cattime · 18/09/2021 11:01

Of course you can’t ask this. You would come across as a loon.

Have you ever heard of weekends?

Imagine the precedent this could set. “Oh, just to let you know, I’ll be bringing Sophie in at 11am on Wednesdays from now on because we do like to visit museums while it’s quiet. Thanks!”

School is not optional, fgs! If you want to be do things your way, you should home school them.

liveforsummer · 18/09/2021 11:02

Surely a 2.30 swimming class will be pre schoolers and not suitable for your dc anyway?

Original poster
PineNutsAreOverpriced · 18/09/2021 11:03

@CalamityJaneDoe - I am currently reading about flex-schooling, I hadn’t heard of it before, thank you

@50ShadesOfCatholic - it is normal here too - I feel that I’ve really let mine down on this Sad and it is embarrassing for them in front of their friends. A combination of not being able to attend baby swim classes when the twins were born (had to be one adult to own child and I had no-one to come with me) and severe PND meant that they were way behind even by the time they started swimming lessons, as they didn’t have that water confidence.

OP posts:
LadyGAgain · 18/09/2021 11:07

Don't be so ridiculous 😂😂😂

Gardenlass · 18/09/2021 11:07

We live by the sea and even in the summer I panic when they go to the beach with friends and other families, as most of their friends can swim well
Swimming in a pool and swimming in the sea are very different things. Strong swimmers can get swept away by tides. Being able to swim would put your mind at rest if they were only paddling in shallow water, but I would never allow children to swim in the sea, I think it's too dangerous.
I don't think a head would allow you to regularly take a child out of lessons. Think what they could be missing at school.

TwoLeftElbows · 18/09/2021 11:08

"don’t want them to miss anything important near the end of the day though. They are all academically able and well ahead expectation wise, if that makes a difference."

Well, they would miss a chunk of their schoolwork. What, exactly, depends on how your school works. Eg if they do maths and English all morning and squeeze everything else into afternoons, then you'd be depriving them of a significant chunk of their broader learning. OTOH, music lessons are seen as a legit reason to miss half an hour a week.

I still think they are very unlikely to say yes. But that's a different question to whether you should ask.

Peanutsandchilli · 18/09/2021 11:10

Expect a visit from the education welfare team if you do this. It's not acceptable. You need to find a swimming lesson slot outside of school time.

lazylinguist · 18/09/2021 11:13

No, not acceptable at all, sorry.

DamnUserName21 · 18/09/2021 11:14

I would do this--you can ask but likely to be shot down.
Swimming is such an important life skill.

Peanutsandchilli · 18/09/2021 11:15

Oh, and I've just seen that you say you can pick up three kids, get them out of school, to the pool and changed, ready to start a swimming lesson, in 15 minutes.

With the best will in the world, no you can't.

toomuchlaundry · 18/09/2021 11:16

I can’t imagine basic swimming lessons will fall within scope of flexi schooling

MintyGreenDream · 18/09/2021 11:16

Your children wouldn't be popular with their classmates if they got special treatment like that.The school won't allow it.

IvySneezes · 18/09/2021 11:19

@PineNutsAreOverpriced school hours are not optional. You’d end up with the PWO visiting you.

EileenGC · 18/09/2021 11:19

I was allowed to leave school 10 minutes early twice a week to get to my classes at a specialist music school 20 miles away - because it was the only one I could attend within a 100 mile radius, and I was a straight A* student who never once asked for a catch up or turned up with missing homework even after leaving school early.

Your situation is different but are the school known for being accommodating? Mine were, which is the only reason why I could leave early. But it was 10 minutes, not a whole period. I also did the occasional whole day absence (music school related as well), but again it was agreed with the school and I was in no way to cause extra work for the poor teachers who had enough to deal with.

BlackberrySky · 18/09/2021 11:20

What would be your plan for them catching up on whatever they miss during that weekly hour at school. If my child was in your class I would be mightily pissed off if the class time was taken up by the teacher having to re-explain to your child.

Warmduscher · 18/09/2021 11:21

@CalamityJaneDoe

BUt be forewarned, flexischooling is something a school can say no to and you may need to provide an educational plan for what you I’ll Ben doing at home
Things may be different where the OP lives, but when I was a school attendance officer (retired last year) flexi-schooling was only offered where a child was either recovering from serious illness or suffered greatly from anxiety about school attendance.

It was a short-term measure put in place for a specified period and reviewed regularly to see how it was working. The aim always was to return the child to full-time attendance in as short a time as possible.

It was never used where a parent wanted to take the child out of school for an extra-curricular activity.

EmeraldShamrock · 18/09/2021 11:21

I doubt they would allow for time off.
Otherwise everyone could pick up at random times.

Bywayofanupdate · 18/09/2021 11:23

Stick them in a few waiting lists as many others will have done and they'll get a place sooner than you think. Mine was 42nd on the waiting list and we got a place 3 days later as all the others had got places elsewhere. You coukd sign them up for an intensive in school holidays too.

notanothertakeaway · 18/09/2021 11:23

I'm surprised you're even considering this!

cookingisoverrated · 18/09/2021 11:24

It's a(n important) sporting activity and it will be a weekly scheduled event. I'd ask.

JADS · 18/09/2021 11:26

Yabu but I completely get why you would want to. I currently have my DS10 doing private swimming lessons at 7pm because it's the only time we can get them. He has SEN. I'm wondering wtf I am doing to him and myself, but I was brought up to believe that swimming is a basic skill and it's just something I can't shake.