Depressed about how lockdown has aged me

[TulipsHyacinths]

I’m embarrassed, and I know it’s so vain, but I just feel a haggard mess now. I’m early 30s and feel like I lost any last remaining vestige of youth during lockdown.

I was just looking at photos from just before lockdown happened and I had glowing skin, glossy hair (even though at the time I felt very ugly and past it already). Now I’m just grey frizzy hair and all these lines have sprung up on my face. My face shape even seems to have changed - it looks all puffy and dull.

I’m embarrassed about how vain this sounds. I’ve never been a looker, but I’m single again after many years so I guess am thinking about my appearance more. Urgh. I do blame lockdown. So much time inside and crying, as well as going through a breakup 😞

Does anyone else feel this way? How do you feel better about it?

Same. I'm 41 so it might just be that I'm in my 40s now, but being stuck at home with three children aged 6 and under has taken its toll.

It's not just me though, my SIL was sharing photos of a family day out a couple of years ago and we all looked amazing and fresh compared to how we look now!

Everyone thinks they look better in photos taken, say, over six months ago. I bet at the time you looked at those photos and hated how you looked! Now you’re looking at them and thinking you look quite nice in them. In six months’ time you’ll look at photos from now and think you look nice in those too.

I was feeling similar a few weeks ago but I have to say I’ve been feeling surprisingly good about my appearance lately, probably because I’ve been out and about a lot recently and my mental health has improved drastically. It probably has nothing at all to do with how I actually look and everything to do with my general well-being and self esteem. Focus on doing some things that make you feel happy and I bet you’ll feel dramatically better about your appearance.

Yes! Both DH and I have aged massively! We noticed it from photos taken just before lockdown compared to now. A combo of stress with homeschooling and working, constant migraines, too many takeaways, too much time at home. I can’t wait to be back at the office a few days a week,

@FirewomanSam

Everyone thinks they look better in photos taken, say, over six months ago. I bet at the time you looked at those photos and hated how you looked! Now you’re looking at them and thinking you look quite nice in them. In six months’ time you’ll look at photos from now and think you look nice in those too.

I was feeling similar a few weeks ago but I have to say I’ve been feeling surprisingly good about my appearance lately, probably because I’ve been out and about a lot recently and my mental health has improved drastically. It probably has nothing at all to do with how I actually look and everything to do with my general well-being and self esteem. Focus on doing some things that make you feel happy and I bet you’ll feel dramatically better about your appearance.

That is true. I find when I start obsessing about my looks it's because I'm really miserable and depressed in general. I'm sure most people don't notice the little lines and imperfections as much as we do ourselves!

I'm mid-30's and noticed the decline from 32 onwards but I'd just had my two DC and I swear I aged a decade in a couple of years. I know it's not in my head as my own mother agreed Stress and overwhelm, marital problems, sleep deprivation and general neglecting myself led to me looking and feeling a state. I used to look young for my age/always ID'd etc but that's allllll gone. It's actually quite remarkable how quickly it happened.

I got Botox last year, I'm not sure it helped. It was very subtle (literally no one in my eagle eyed family noticed) but I felt I looked "odd" rather than "better" so I didn't bother getting it again. Focusing on health and fitness at the minute hoping that will give me a "boost" and help me feel confident and strong and stop focusing on my vanity 🤞🏼

Hands up, I've noticed the same here. Also early 30's but the stress of the last year or so has just wiped my face and added about 10 years. I can't even joke about laughter lines, laughter has been little unfortunately. My eyes are dull, face wrinkled, especially around the eyes, I'm pinched in the face and fatter than I would like else where. I saw myself in a window the other day and didn't recognise my posture. Everything is just so slumped.

I mean it's been a Pandemic, I imagine it's aged or tried us all but the physical effects are all of a sudden apparent. I don't know if it's that I've been throwing myself into getting my eldest what he needs (disabled), the fact my youngest never fucking sleeps (git), the family trails and loses of the past 18 months or if I was always this hunched and wrinkly and didn't realise

I'm 34. Before lockdown I was a young mum. I was id often. Men harassed me in more flattering ways. Now I'm old. Going grey. Considering work on my face. A particular frown that I developed has stuck. A less optimistic inner monologue persists. I smile less. Laugh less. Moan more. It's changed me for the worse.

I was thinking the same about aging over the last couple of years. I'm mid 50s and used to pass as late 40s. For me I think it's partly the lapsing of my morning routine with lashings of moisturiser and body lotion. My eye cream and moisturiser used to last 3 months, but I'm sure my current ones were opened over a year ago.

I've kept the face going as I've been teaching remotely, always visible on Teams so don't want the frighten the horses.

From the waist down, not so much. Got Covid fatter arse, Covid bad back with all the teaching online.

Get yourself to a hairdresser and also get a facial. I HATE facials but a good one will work wonders and kick start you a bit. Then a good skin care regime, an hours walk a day if you can manage it and eat clean for a week or two. Those are the things that work for me...

Inspired by your advice, I exfoliated last night! Not sure if it made a difference today but I’d forgotten how nice and smooth it made my skin feel afterwards. I used to always exfoliate 3 x per week as part of my skincare routine - all that stuff just went out the window during covid.

Today’s target: drinking lots of water.

Good for you Tulips!

Thank you!

It's amazing how much weight a lot of people have pilled on over lockdown.

I think we need to get out of the WFH/lockdown mentality now!

Me too! Some past holiday photos from abroad popped up on my phone, this year I look old, fat and washed out in the photos from our UK break!

I'm 40's though and looking back fondly on photos from my 30s so be warned it only gets worse with age!

Yes. I was starting to think I was alone in this. I've got fatter, which I can address. I was looking older, I've improved my skincare and started tretinoin, which has helped. But I caught covid 3 weeks ago and it's put at least 8 years on me. I look really old and haggard. Early 40s here, who when roots done, could probably pass for early 30s.

@BabyAlexander

Yes. I was starting to think I was alone in this. I've got fatter, which I can address. I was looking older, I've improved my skincare and started tretinoin, which has helped. But I caught covid 3 weeks ago and it's put at least 8 years on me. I look really old and haggard. Early 40s here, who when roots done, could probably pass for early 30s.

What tretinoin are you on? I was using Isotrexin for my acne/scarring but they discontinued it :( Trying to find a new one!

I'm sure you can quickly reverse the results of covid once you're properly better again!

@Rozziie I use dermatica. I hear good things about skin and me too. I've got a referral code if you'd like it.

@HangOnToYourself

I was feeling this way and my friend got me into doing a proper skin care routine and even in just a few weeks I've seen a huge improvement

This is one thing lots of women forgot about. If you wfh or were on furlough, lots of us stopped using make up. Then you don't bother with facewash because no make up, then no need to moisturise because no facewash and make up. I had really good and simple routine before and it's gone to fuck during lockdown. Lazy, innit. Returned to it, bar make up because wfh, and the difference is there

Menawhile my DH doesn't even need to look at moisturising😂 bastard

Oh and collagen and vit c rich food. Our collagen production lowers from about 25. It's great for face AND joints

Yes! I did this; Medik8 crystal retinal, tanning drops for face, dye brows regularly and started seeing the salon owner for cut and colour. Still look how I'm gonna look but it makes a big difference!