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Original poster

Child not drinking at school

32 replies

krj2608 · 16/09/2021 13:23

My 4 year old daughter started school this week. A bit of background- she is under paediatrician for recurring utis (3-5 weekly).
Sometimes needs some reminders to drink. They think dehydration is one of the causes for them.

Yesterday she came home with a full up water bottle, and complaining she was sore down below. She was really red so I put sone sudacrem on her. We had a chat about drinking at school. She is quite shy so wouldn't necessarily ask for her drink.

I spoke to her teacher this morning about the history of utis and would they mind reminding her at snack and lunch. She has dairy allergy too so cannot have the milk cartons. I would really prefer her not back on antibiotics and wetting herself 10 times a day, and more hassle for them constantly changing her!

Her teachers response was "well we can't force her". I said no I understand that and it's very busy with children starting school (I'm was a reception teacher so I do understand) but when they have snack/milk could she be reminded to get her water bottle, she will drink.

I'm just really shocked at the teachers response!

OP posts:
FuckingFlumps · 16/09/2021 13:26

The teacher is right though. It's been hot in most parts of England since kids went back to school. They will already have been reminding children to get a drink several times during the day and if be very surprised if she wasn't already being told to get her water bottle at snack time but if the child doesn't drink then there really isn't much more the teacher can do.

PumpkinKlNG · 16/09/2021 13:27

No advice but my daughter is 4 and just started as well and is always coming out of school with her water bottle unopened, I asked her if she drinks in school and she said no only at lunch time (I assumed maybe they were giving her drinks) I don’t think she has easy access to the water and it’s if like my daughters school it is in her bag then the bag is put in a box then she doesn’t see it again until home time Confused

Sirzy · 16/09/2021 13:30

Surely when it’s snack time all the children not having milk will be getting their water - abs reminded to do so. I assume there will be water/milk at lunch too.

Sadly there is only so much they can do.

Original poster
krj2608 · 16/09/2021 13:32

It's not only mine then!

I'm hoping its just the whole change of starting school and being a bit nervousHmm

I wouldn't expect them to force her to drink btw! I just don't want her being poorly

OP posts:
Alwaystired99 · 16/09/2021 13:37

I would expect them to try to encourage her more with her medical history. Is there a Senco you could speak to for their advice/ liaison with teacher? She's very little still so extra help doesn't seem unreasonable.

PumpkinKlNG · 16/09/2021 13:40

I don’t think mine has access to hers she mentioned not seeing the bag at all after she takes it off so definitely going to bring it up with them, I don’t see why they can’t encourage her doesn’t even sound like they are doing that 😕

AdriannaP · 16/09/2021 13:41

My DC had similar issues and I have asked at several points in YR and Y1 to remind her to drink during the day (as otherwise she came home super thirsty, drunk a ton late in the afternoon and evenings and then wet the bed.) teachers were always happy to help and tackle the problem with us. They are only 4 and 5 in YearR, teachers can and should help with those things.

lanthanum · 16/09/2021 13:41

Totally reasonable request, and hopefully the teacher now understands that you were just asking for reminders, not for them to pour the water down her. There is a lot for them to keep track of, but hopefully she'll keep an eye to check she has her water at snack time, now she knows there's a particular issue.

Have you checked that she can open the bottle easily? I can imagine some children being shy to ask.

MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 16/09/2021 13:42

Big drink before school and drinks after ?

Rugsofhonour · 16/09/2021 13:44

This reply has been deleted

Withdrawn at the user's request

FuckingFlumps · 16/09/2021 13:46

For those saying their children's bottles stay in their bags check with the staff there is normally somewhere for the bottles to go so they are all together e.g a tray or basket for example. The staff probably don't know your child has a bottle in school if they are not putting it in the box with all the others.

It's also worthwhile checking she can actually open her bottle independently you'd be amazed at how many parents send their children in with a bottle their child cannot open independently.

PumpkinKlNG · 16/09/2021 13:48

I don’t think they put them in a big tray at my kids school. Surely they would check if a child had a water bottle if they were just sitting their not drinking when all the other children were?

Original poster
krj2608 · 16/09/2021 13:51

Thank you all.

Hopefully she will have had some water today. I would provide alternative milk but she's not a huge fan of it.

She does have a drink before school and after school, I encourage her in the queue this morning to have some before she went in. She drinks after school but she was sore by the time we got home. I think there's only so much her bladder can hold, she is tiny (in age2-3 school uniform).

She can open the bottle as it's one she used before starting school in the holidays.

OP posts:
ShushShushShush · 16/09/2021 13:52

They should be happy to remind her.

A bit off the wall but, how does she feel about the toilets?

My DS didn't/doesn't like the hand dryer noise or that it was easy for other children to wander in when he was weeing. He wouldn't go in a cubicle at all. He stopped drinking so he didn't have to go to the toilet and then would come home and tank a litre of water.

FuckingFlumps · 16/09/2021 13:54

@PumpkinKlNG

I don’t think they put them in a big tray at my kids school. Surely they would check if a child had a water bottle if they were just sitting their not drinking when all the other children were?
I would ask the child if I'd specifically sat them all on the carpet and told them to get a drink but I only normally do that when it's hot. I would also check their bag for one if they were not having milk at group snack time.

However I wouldn't garuntee I'd notice if a child hadn't brought a water bottle on a normal day where I didn't have them all sitting on the carpet drinking form them at the same time. I would however offer them a drink from a cup if they looked hot or had asked for a drink and they said they didn't have a bottle.

Sirzy · 16/09/2021 13:58

Is she ok with the school toilets? Many children avoid drinking to avoid the toilets

Rosesareyellow · 16/09/2021 14:01

I’m a teacher and certainly if there was a health issue I’d be happy to remind her. But to be fair the whole class most likely gets reminded anyway - maybe that’s what she meant.

Dippydinosaurus · 16/09/2021 14:04

In reception they will have break time in the morning with fruit and a drink. Register with cool milk to be delivered to school it's free until the age of 5. Then at lunchtime they will have water bottles next to them and also at afternoon break. There will be opportunities to drink and she will be encouraged to do so. So it's not that she doesn't have a chance to drink. So I'd send her in with juice in the water bottle with a letter explaining. I'd also send her with a carton of juice for lunch too. Not ideal as they're sugary but utis are really unpleasant and I'd have no problem as a teacher doing this for a child in class as a temporary measure.

Mistyplanet · 16/09/2021 14:15

My son didnt drink much in reception until i tried a sistema flip lid bottle with a rubber straw. He liked chewing on the straw so ended up drinking more. Maybe a fun waterbottle will help ? X

LakeShoreD · 16/09/2021 14:19

I know it’s not the done thing but what about flavoured water to encourage her to drink? School won’t even realise if it’s clear in colour.

Pumpkinseedpesto · 16/09/2021 14:22

@Sirzy

Is she ok with the school toilets? Many children avoid drinking to avoid the toilets
I second that. Lots of kids hate using a different toilet/ don’t sit down properly on the loo etc. They will avoid drinking to prevent needing to go.
AwaAnBileYerHeid · 16/09/2021 14:23

Would maybe a little reward for coming home with an empty bottle help? Or a word with the school nurse seeing as its impacting upon her health? She could then have a word with the teacher, which may be more effective at encouraging the teacher to remind her to drink as its coming from a medical professional?

Vallmo47 · 16/09/2021 14:24

This is a bug bear for me as well with schools. Both my kids barely drink while there and then one of them drinks like they’ve never seen water before. It’s a choice they make to, sometimes because they don’t feel they have time (friends and wanting to play) and sometimes to avoid toilets/getting told off for needing the toilet too frequently. I hope your reminder helped.

FuckingFlumps · 16/09/2021 14:26

Or a word with the school nurse seeing as its impacting upon her health?

Do state schools still have nurses? I've been teaching for years and been to hundreds of schools and have never come across one with a nurse.

Kaley3043 · 16/09/2021 14:28

Hopefully she's at the very least having a cup of water at lunchtime. Often Dd comes home with a full drinks bottle but she does have a cup of water at lunch... not that's enough but better than nothing

Sometimes DS comes home with a full bottle just because he's re filled it and in fact drank it all.

I get the frustration with the school but they are right, they can't force her.

Maybe an incentive for her to drink? Say if she drinks her bottle of water she get some sweeties after school? Not sure if this is the right idea but definitely an idea. We've had to do things similar with DS or other things.

Maybe a new drinks bottle that she picks herself? Dd loves her glittery drinks bottle.

Also, is she avoiding drinking so she doesn't have to use the toilet?

Would he be more willing to drink squash? I know it's usually frowned upon but many parents buy drinks bottles you can't even see what's inside and tbh in your case if the school kicked up, I'd tell the school to stuff it. Id rather my two drink squash than nothing but they do drink water now (never used to).

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