AIBU to go to lunch

[sandybeaches74]

So I have a business lunch planned with a colleague from work who is male, I am female. It's a business relationship with someone who I respect a lot and know through work engagements. It's worth mentioning that I work as a senior leader in a big corporate and networking pre-Covid was quite normal.

I always used to have long conversations with this particular individual pre-Covid and we have decided now things are open again to meet up and have lunch to catchup. It's in the work calendar.

You've probably guessed my question but my sort of BF (I'm divorced) has said that he has an issue with this and it's a date. I disagree and I don't see any reason to make massive explanations or justifications for going.

AIBU? Would you be upset if your partner went on a lunch like this?

No, of course not. Go. Your sort of BF is being an arse.

Oh my goodness really….

You have to be left to do your work and networking as you see fit, it’s not part of a ‘romantic’ relationship neither are your friendships if that come up.

It's a business lunch. Your BF is an idiot.

Your BF is an arse, and frankly I'd treat this kind of behaviour as a red flag, even if others wouldn't. It's a professional meeting where people eat, not a date.

Go to lunch. Tell bf to get a grip.

Your sort of BF sounds like a sort of twat.

Eh? Your BF is totally U.

My DP goes to business lunches / meals out / drinks often, it's part of being at a senior level in his industry. I would never tell him not to go, or it was a date if it was a female colleague!

Your BF sounds like a child. Does he have a job and understand what a professional relationship is?

You need a new bf

You're a senior leader in the corporate world and your boyfriend has you second guessing perfectly normal work behaviour? He's done a real number on you. Dump him fast.

Obviously I'm going on the lunch but I just wondered others perspectives on it, they seem to be pretty aligned

AIBU? Would you be upset if your partner went on a lunch like this?

No, because I am a grown up!

That would raise a red flag about BF to me.

Is your boyfriend ... mike pence?

Of course I wouldn’t mind if it was DH. He’s being an arse.

Yanbu

Jesus. I've worked in IT and Finance for years and sadly it's mostly blokes all round. If I had to avoid lunches, trips and meetings because of some jealous twat.....I've managed not to shag any of them.

Drop your BF, don't bring crazy and jealousy into your life

If I were you I’d be going to lunch and ditching the sort of boyfriend. Sounds very controlling.

Well, having worked in an environment where these lunches are very common, I'm going to say that a large proportion of them are not quite as innocent as those involved would have you believe, but that's why you have to trust your partner....or not.

It’s a business lunch
However your BF is showing you just how controlling he can be, so forewarned is forearmed. I would be questioning the relationship

Even without the business/networking background, there's nothing wrong with having lunch with a friend.

Your boyfriend is acting like your Dad, and treating you like you’re about 12.

He is not long term partner material.

The fact you’re even questioning this makes me think he’s already subtly controlling you.

He's an insecure idiot.

"my sort of BF (I'm divorced) has said that he has an issue with this and it's a date."

Even if he was my husband, I'd be telling him to get a grip. My 'sort of boyfriend' could go fuck himself. I mean - really? Red flag, red flag flying.

Yes you should. You are a grown up professional, like my DH who has working lunches with grown up, professional women occasionally. It's fine.