How would you feel if the standard household was single income again?

[Omydearehert]

Not necessarily the man working. How would you feel if a single income was enough to live off of and became the standard again?

Technically we can currently now afford to live on either DH’s or my salary and the other stay at home.

That would cover our bills, food etc but not afford us holidays or meals out regularly. We live a pretty frugal lifestyle and both enjoy our jobs.

Yay we'd be rich! Neither DH nor I would back down from working!

I love the idea that a single wage would allow you to buy your own house and live comfortably - i.e. not sacrifice holidays and savings and luxuries.

But along with it I would like a shift in societal thinking, so it's normal for everyone to work part time. It's normal for parents of young children to be able to work their working pattern to maximise their time at home with the children. Couples without children can make it so they have large amounts of time off together - or to pursue individual interests, and of course those who want to - or need to - are able to work full time.

It's only workable for me if it's not returning to an expectation that women stay at home.

We are lucky to be able to afford to live off DH's income but I can't imagine ever actually doing it because 1) I don't want to stay at home and 2) I'd be too worried about lack of security if something happened to his job

@MadeOfStarStuff

I would be fucking delighted as a single adult household

Never going to happen though

I am also a single adult household. I don't think such scenario would benefit us. Single mothers don't really fare well in societies where partnered women don't work (could have been more politically correct with "parents" and "people", just cynical). Childcare, for example, will become a rare and expensive commodity.

I haven’t worked since our first child was born and he’s nearly 18 now. It’s worked great for us as I love being at home for the kids and it allows me to do some things I’m passionate about. It’s not for everyone but it works for us. My partner earns a high salary and is very easy going, there’s never been any resentment from him about me not working. He really enjoys his career which obviously makes things easier. We have a really lovely life and I wouldn’t change it.

Already a single parent and single income here.

Strange thread…many millions of people are lone parent households already…so we’re used to it.

Single parent here with no financial help from exh, so mine already is a single income household.

If rather it was normalised to have decent, part time working incomes and seniority.

Too much emphasis on the full 35-40 hour week is not a way to run a modern society. Modern life comes with a long home to do list, even if you don't have children.

It should be possible to live on two adults working 50-60 hours between them.

I’m a single parent and sole breadwinner so it would not change my life at all.

Agree with others that the idea of the “traditional” family with a working dad and SAHM has only been possible for the middle classes throughout much of history anyway. Which is just one reason why I think the fallacy that a SAHM is best is so irritating.

A lot of the insistence that it’s best to have a mother at home stems from a combination not just of misogyny but middle keepy uppy.

My grandfather on my mums side insisted my grandmother stay at home largely because he thought having a working wife made him look poor.

The SAHM as normal is a very recent and very middle class affectation.

@MaverickDanger

I’ve always felt the single income thing was quite middle class. I’m from working class immigrant roots and none of my female relatives could afford to stay at home.

All worked as nurses, or in factories - often doing a night shift to afford to pay the bills. It wasn’t even like this was for extra luxuries.

Personally I would still work as I enjoy having independence & financial security if anything happened to DH or our relationship.

This. I sometimes think this is a different world.

My mother grew up in the 1940s as a latch key kid as both parents worked in factories. Prior to that, their parents worked in factories and their large families lived in the back to backs with the 'elders' at home.

Growing up in the 70s and 80s, my mother worked several jobs as a cleaner and bar maid.

Never known the luxury of a single income household with two adults.

I think it would be wonderful for families to have more choice over who worked, how much they worked and whether they they worked all through the lives of the children, or could take breaks. That is not to say everyone should, but having the flexibility to do what feels right at different times would be amazing.

As a full disclaimer, I'm SAH, and that is only possible because DH is a high earner. We are not as wealthy as others, and would obviously be far bette riff if we both worked, but we made this decision and are grateful to have had the option.

Even if it was possible in most cases I'd still want to work. It's not the money, it's independence and security, it's using my own skills and having a separate existence away from home.

Well it would be lovely if house prices were affordable for all and a second income was optional for luxuries only. Can't see that ever happening though.

I don’t understand this. A single income is enough for many, both my husband and I could live independently and financially support ourselves.

Single income families were a middle class status symbol in Victorian and Edwardian times. Then after the war lots of women were turfed out of jobs they had done well to make space for men who had been demobbed.
Whilst I recognise the point about the impact of the high cost of living versus wage levels this is not a new thing. My concern is single income may be a return to women being the default unpaid care giver. I couldn't have coped with that long term (in fact DH was a SAHD when the DC were young but we now both work).

I would give up work instantly

Not sure why you have posted that, OP. Many of us are already single parents, running our households on a single salary.
To make it viable for everyone would require inflationary wage rises and/or a large house price crash. Not going to happen.
I doubt many women would want to be stuck at home as bored housewives anyway. Many in the 60s necked gin and valium to get through the tedium!

As a low earning single parent I would love that the cost of living was low enough that I didn't need tax credit top ups just to survive. I'm getting increasingly worried about the point when tax credit stop but the children still aren't quite independent enough to manage financially by themselves and still need my help. A single low wage doesn't cover the cost of running a home.

We could afford to have one of stay at home but it would be pretty boring, I like our lifestyle that the two incomes allow.

I’ve been single for years on and off so have had to live on one income. Luckily I have a HA house so the rent is manageable. Could never afford to buy on one salary where I am. I did have a partner once who earned roughly the same as me. We lived together for a spell. We could have managed on one salary, it would have been tight but doable. But we both worked and so the second salary paid for all the luxuries. Regular meals out, trips away, expensive tech, etc.

When I was a kid people rarely ate out, usually it only happened if it was a big celebration, they didn’t go off for weekends in Europe. It was a holiday once a year at most. No tech, no spending money on lots of clothes etc. No gym membership, cleaners etc. So that’s why it was possible for people to manage on one salary. The cost of living has gone up. But so have people’s expectations. Everyone wants the “extras” so that requires 2 salaries. I think there are certainly plenty of families that could manage on one if they lived a basic lifestyle but no one wants that.

I doubt many women would want to be stuck at home as bored housewives anyway.

OP did say not necessarily the man working. I’ve never been a ‘stuck at home bored housewife’ despite not working. There lots of things to do and get involved in.

It’s possible to live on a single income but with a much reduced standard of living. Loads of people live alone. Expectations are way higher now, people have to work to afford it. It’s not necessarily a bad thing and many people enjoy and want to work.

@Bumblenums1234

Well I would hate it as it would mean either, I had to give up my career that I love. Or, dp would be at home everyday whilst I grew resentful that he was chilling out on the money I made. I would still put DS into nursery as I think socialising with other children is really important so dp would just be playing PlayStation and scratching his bollocks all day. This house will remain a two income family I think.

Of course you wouldn’t ‘have to’… you could still both work, you’d just have more disposable income. We could technically live off either one of our salaries, but we still choose to both work.