My DM's anxiety- AIBU?

[Maybcrazy]

My DM has diagnosed anxiety and is on medication, I hold my hand up to say I probably don't fully understand it, I've always been anxious myself about things I would consider most people are e.g night before a test, starting new job, worrying about my kids etc but I don't know what it's like to have diagnosed anxiety.
My DM's anxiety around my kids is starting to drive me mad, she worries about my older child, if they will be ok on the first day back to school, if they've got friends etc. And with my youngest it's even worse, DM was doing all childcare while I worked completely at her request but she found it a little too much so I've got him into nursery started last week. DM was worried sick, calling me and texting asking questions about the nursery and then saying she didn't think he was ready for nursery now and she thinks it's a mistake.
Little examples of other things: she'll come to my house and put toys she thinks are too little or dangerous away and say he cant play with them as she's worried (generally things that are 3+, he's 2.5 but never puts things in his mouth and is always supervised anyway) she frets when he jumps or runs incase he falls over. And if he does fall over she goes into panic mode and he is much worse because I think he's reacting from her reaction!
There is more but dont want to ramble on.
She'll text me to tell me things she's worried about all the time.
I know i probably sound heartless but it's so draining, especially the nursery thing and she was so encouraging at the start saying yes he needs to start nursery it'll be great for him etc to now telling me it's a mistake and she's worried the whole time he's there. Like I'm not worried myself already but I know he'll be fine.
Tell me if IABU?

I have diagnosed anxiety and have found beta blockers to help greatly. Can you gently remind her that this is her anxiety talking and that she needs not to express it to you?

She isn't being fair to you at all.

Does she recognise the anxiety in herself, and is she getting help to deal with it?

I have an anxiety disorder. She needs CBT. I'd tell her to how to her doctor and every time tell her it's her anxiety talking and it's fine. I have to tell myself it's my anxiety and that the risks of whatever are super low but I'd never put the stress of my anxiety on other people.

If we do have any discussion about it she usually says I can't help it or that it's just the way she is. At a rough guess she was diagnosed about 8 years ago with the anxiety (before that she had depression) and she had some kind of therapy at the time and then just medication which I think is pregabalin.

She has reviews but I imagine she must be telling them she's fine. Maybe she thinks its normal to still worry like she does, I do feel bad when I get annoyed because I can't imagine what it must be like to worry about everything all the time.
She worries about my DC a lot but she worries about a lot of other things too.

Tell her as little as possible and keep your answers short 'he's fine. It's going well'. My DM is like this and it's the only thing that keeps me sane. Ie, she had no idea DH may well be about to lose his job as I can't take the constant fretting.

There's two things at play here.

1.) Her anxiety - she can't really help.

2.) Telling you about it and undermining your parenting - she can help.

She has no right to be putting any toys away in your house and she needs to stop.

Having an anxiety or trauma disorder (whether it's Generalised Anxiety Disorder, Panic Disorder, Agoraphobia, PTSD or OCD) is horrible and for most people affects most areas of their life and steals their happiness so I feel sorry for your Mum.

However your Mum needs to get some more psychotherapy (ideally CBT) and to avoid asking you for reassurance all of the time (e.g. phoning to check on her grandchildren) as that just fuels the anxiety and makes things worse.