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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think you can’t shoot someone in the face by accident?

36 replies

IcyBob · 12/09/2021 13:07

Last week at the park, 10yo DS was shot in the eye with a nerf gun by a boy of about the same age from another school. His eye was sore and red and watery, and his vision was blurred for a moment but recovered.

Two days later at the same park, the boy was there again with the gun. He approached DS again and DS told him he didn’t want to play with him and not to shoot him again. The boy did shoot at him, so DS picked up the nerf bullet and put it in the bin (not an ideal reaction, I know…) The boy’s mum came over to complain and the situation was resolved. What irked me was that she kept insisting that her boy shot DS “by accident”. According to DS and his friends, he pointed the gun deliberately at DS’s face and pulled the trigger. Surely even a very small child would understand what would happen and why it was a bad idea? And if for whatever reason they couldn’t understand, they shouldn’t be wandering around unsupervised with a nerf gun?

Am I being a uptight killjoy?

OP posts:
CuriousaboutSamphire · 12/09/2021 13:09

Nope. And I think your son dealt with the nerf gun really well.

The other mum needs to have a small think about how her child actually uses the bloody thing.

GnomeyGnome · 12/09/2021 13:12

What kind of idiot allows their child to play with loaded nerf guns in a park? Good on your DS for throwing it in the bin, I would have as well.

rosesandsalvia · 12/09/2021 13:12

I agree with you, although he may not have intended to shoot him in the eye, if you point a gun at someone's face then that is a pretty unsurprising consequence.

I also think it was fine to put the nerf bullet in the bin - your son asked not to be shot at and the other boy didn't listen. If he wants to keep his bullets he needs to learn not to shoot at people who do not want to play.

SantanaBinLorry · 12/09/2021 13:12

Its aaaalways by accident isnt it?
Direct hits to the chops is NEVER an accident in my book.

YANBU

Its always the same kids having the same accident ;)

AtrociousCircumstance · 12/09/2021 13:13

YANBU.

MrsSkylerWhite · 12/09/2021 13:14

Your son handled it really well.
I’d have been tempted to throw the gun in the bin …….

SheldonesqueTheBstard · 12/09/2021 13:15

No judgement from me on the bullet binning.

Actions and consequences. rosesandsalvia nailed it.

SoupDragon · 12/09/2021 13:16

You can do it by accident but what you describe doesn't sound like one at all.

girlmom21 · 12/09/2021 13:19

If your DS was running past and the other boy happened to fire a bullet in his direction and it hit him, then yeah of course he could have shot him by accident, but that's not what happened.

Your DS responded really sensibly putting the bullet in the bin IMO. His moms a dick.

KimDeals · 12/09/2021 13:20

Honestly, these fucking nerf guns.

My son shot ME in the eye. It was terrifying. I don’t think he meant to shoot me but it went straight in the bin (after I got back from hospital).

But he loves guns!! And he has others. I really have to reinforce the rule constantly of never pointing it at someone. Only playing with it, with me there. They’d all be in the bin only he abides by my word. (Only one remaining one actually shoots very squishy pellets slowly and thank god it usually jams and doesn’t work).

He loves shooting at targets and he also loves archery.

That mum is ridiculous not taking the gun off her son.

knobblykneesandturnedouttoes · 12/09/2021 13:27

I shot my own daughter in the eye by accident. Combination of bad aim and wind. Was aiming for midriff area. Not saying this boy did the same, just saying it is absolutely possible to do this by accident.

NuffSaidSam · 12/09/2021 13:31

I've also been shot in the face by accident so it's absolutely possible, but that isn't what happened here.

I think DS was absolutely right to put the bullet in the bin.

LtGreggs · 12/09/2021 13:32

Possibly she meant 'by accident' as in he did not mean to cause so much hurt - ie he was naive in his actions. Though if she did, it's still something that needs addressing.

For those above saying that it is inappropriate to play with nerf guns in a park - seems to me that's an ideal place to play with them?! Assuming that 'park' = big open space. Am I missing something?

NuffSaidSam · 12/09/2021 13:33

'Assuming that 'park' = big open space. Am I missing something?'

That park often means 'playground'.

And the presence of other people, who don't wish to be shot, in that park.

healmebaby · 12/09/2021 13:35

Of course you can

Original poster
IcyBob · 12/09/2021 13:35

Fair enough, I accept it could have been an accident. I didn’t witness it happen. I’ve never used a nerf gun myself and we don’t have one at home.

I do like to think that if the situation has been reversed I wouldn’t have tried to defend DS, even if he did insist it was an accident (because I know most kids lie to get out of trouble, including him) and would have told him the binned bullet was his own fault.

OP posts:
Crunchymum · 12/09/2021 13:37

I'm interested to hear how it was resolved @IcyBob?

Hopefully by you telling the mother how inappropriate and dangerous it was to allow her son to have a loaded nerf gun and how this was the second time her son has shot your son, to which she apologised profusely and confiscated said gun.

KimDeals · 12/09/2021 13:40

Sorry - I didn’t make my point clearly - kids find it very hard NOT to try shoot people - yes it can be an accident but they are bloody dangerous things and should not be used to “play-shoot” AT people as targets! It’s not OK to have aimed for the body and have a whoopsie.

SylvanasWindrunner · 12/09/2021 13:40

I'd be so angry that this had happened not once, but twice. Who the hell lets their child wander around a public playground with a nerf gun when they seem unable to stop hitting other children with it?! I think they are a monumentally stupid thing to take into any kind of public playpark with other children around in the first place.

The mother sounds useless.

TheWoleb · 12/09/2021 13:41

How was it resolved? I'm just hoping you didnt give her money to buy more bullets!

And also, I think your son's reaction was perfect. Wish I had had the wherewithal at that age to take a bully's stuff and chuck it in the bin when they used it to hurt people.

GiveMeAUserName123 · 12/09/2021 13:41

Yes it can be done accidentally. I know someone who got shot with a pellet gun and had to go hospital.

Toddlerteaplease · 12/09/2021 13:42

Your son was incredibly lucky not to have his eyesight damaged beyond repair.

itsgettingwierd · 12/09/2021 13:48

I LOVE the fact he out the bullet in the bin Grin

You can accidentally hit someone I guess if you're shooting it and they run into the path or whatever.

But somehow I very much doubt this was an accident and it was aimed - not only based on probability but by the reaction of the kid and his mum on this occasion.

QueenFreesia2021 · 12/09/2021 13:50

I think putting it in the bin was actually pretty mature. Plenty of other 10 years olds would have reacted by hitting him back.

itsgettingwierd · 12/09/2021 13:51

Imo nerf guns are for playing in private gardens and spaces.

I'd never allow ds to play in a public park or space with his.

However there have been incidents of being hit in the face which happens when there's a few kids all pelting each other with nerf bullets. But in ds and our neighbours kids case they were all playing with shared consent and an understanding you didn't deliberately shoot towards someone's face.