AIBU to get myself a full ADHD assessment for my birthday?

[Goshitstricky]

I am 100% convinced I have ADHD, I always have been and being an adult and a chaotic one at that I've never been less certain.

Im not going to my GP, I live in an area where there is zero support for this, my children with additional needs haven't been able to access support so I certainly won't. The anxiety around asking is enough to put me off.

So speaking to DH I said that I don't think I can go on and keep the cycle of chaos going on in my head without knowing I will one day get support for it.

I'm studying an access course and I can't see me completing it or passing without some sort of help, I'm at the brink of leaving me job because I can't cope with it but also know I can't be unemployed because I'm impulsive and will no doubt create a new drama without something to fill that gap.

So looking online I have found various places that I can get a full assessment and either a yes/no diagnosis at the end, they're all booked up until my birthday next year so I said to DH I'd like to invest in that for my birthday as I genuinely believe it would help me. It would be a lot more than the family would spend on my birthday and we can't afford it without dressing it up as a gift.

So AIBU for doing that?

@Goshitstricky

Just to update,

I was lucky enough that my econsult was sent to one of the practice partners who always gives 100% to his patients. He was lovely, so kind and understanding. He's made the referral for me, he has given me a self assessment questionnaire to fill out and generally seemed to want to help.
I also went to additional needs centre and got a pass to the LSA run open support sessions for if/when I need them and I'm not on the books for them to check in and see how I'm doing and if anymore support can be added in they will give it.

I can't believe how kind everyone was, I was expecting dismissal and eye rolls of I'm honest. Clearly I've spent too long with my sons high school senco where everything is like pulling teeth!

Thanks again for everyone's input, I have a long road to go but I feel like I've made a really great step today.

That's brilliant news! So glad you had such a great experience!

Direct from the gov UK website:

Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and driving

You must tell DVLA if your attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) or your ADHD medication affects your ability to drive safely.

You can be fined up to £1,000 if you do not tell DVLA about a medical condition that affects your driving. You may be prosecuted if you’re involved in an accident as a result.
Car or motorcycle licence
If you already have a car or motorcycle licence you need to tell DVLA if:

there is a change to your condition that may make you an unsafe driver
you are prescribed medication that causes side effects that will affect your driving
Fill in form A1 and send it to DVLA. The address is on the form.

//

The point is that it's actually difficult to assess if you are a safe driver if you've just been newly diagnosed. Be safe, not sorry.

@Thatsjustwhatithink

Direct from the gov UK website:

Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and driving

You must tell DVLA if your attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) or your ADHD medication affects your ability to drive safely.

You can be fined up to £1,000 if you do not tell DVLA about a medical condition that affects your driving. You may be prosecuted if you’re involved in an accident as a result.
Car or motorcycle licence
If you already have a car or motorcycle licence you need to tell DVLA if:

there is a change to your condition that may make you an unsafe driver
you are prescribed medication that causes side effects that will affect your driving
Fill in form A1 and send it to DVLA. The address is on the form.

//

The point is that it's actually difficult to assess if you are a safe driver if you've just been newly diagnosed. Be safe, not sorry.

You realise you have just confirmed your previous statement was incorrect.

You need to check that a private diagnosis will be accepted by whoever you would like treatment from e.g. local NHS team.

@Stompythedinosaur

You need to check that a private diagnosis will be accepted by whoever you would like treatment from e.g. local NHS team.

This is shared care, she's checking already I think.

@Fluffypastelslippers

Not at all. As she is being newly diagnosed and does not yet know what the result is, she needs to tell DVLA. Especially if they offer medication. There some really good sites on ADHD that can explain this better than me.

I'm also really surprised that people say that ADHD doesn't possibly affect their ability to drive when the symptoms in adults from the NHS are given as the following:

Some specialists have suggested the following as a list of symptoms associated with ADHD in adults:

-carelessness and lack of attention to detail
continually starting new tasks before finishing old ones
-poor organisational skills
-inability to focus or prioritise
-continually losing or misplacing things
forgetfulness
-restlessness and edginess
-difficulty keeping quiet, and speaking out of turn
blurting out responses and often interrupting -others
-mood swings, irritability and a quick temper
inability to deal with stress
-extreme impatience, taking risks in activities, often with** little or no regard for personal safety or the safety of others – for example, driving dangerously

She might not be diagnosed with anything yet, so why do you think she needs to tell the DVLA? If my local adult ADHD team is anything to go by, it could be another four years before she even gets an audience with the psychiatrist so what are the DVLA meant to do with the knowledge that OP is going to get an assessment at some indeterminate point in the future with an, as yet, totally unascertained outcome?

The wording quite clearly says if if effects your driving.

I have ADHD, I’ve been driving 15 years, I’ve never had a ticket or a speed awareness course or anything like that. Driving appears to be one area of my life where I am able to concentrate and fully apply myself.

[quote Thatsjustwhatithink]@Fluffypastelslippers

Not at all. As she is being newly diagnosed and does not yet know what the result is, she needs to tell DVLA. Especially if they offer medication. There some really good sites on ADHD that can explain this better than me.[/quote]

You. Do. Not. Need. To. Notify. The. DVLA.

Posted too soon.

There is no NEED about it. It's up to the individual to decide whether the condition affects their driving. Now that not be the way you think things should be done, but that is how it's done. There is no need or must about it. The rules are clear and they state if.

Yanbu. I am absolutely convinced that I have ADHD too and became even more convinced after my son was diagnosed. But having a diagnosis doesn't help me or get me any extra support that I need, so I've not bothered getting one. In your case, there is a benefit to getting diagnosed (extra support with your course) so I would go for it.

Oh bollocks, should have RTFT instead of impulsively replying (will make no comment about my ADHD and impulse control )

Who would you recommend for an assessment in the UK, if I wanted to go private?
Psychiatry UK looked a good option but I think a PP has said they are now oversubscribed.

I did a zoom appointment with the ADHD centre and it was a week or so wait. That was last year.

I take medication and you DO need to tell the DVLA as they are amphetamine based. I can not drive though.

@Fifipopopo

I did a zoom appointment with the ADHD centre and it was a week or so wait. That was last year.

I take medication and you DO need to tell the DVLA as they are amphetamine based. I can not drive though.

Thank you. I have had a look at their website and I think I will get in touch.

The pricing page doesn't seem to load, but I guess I can just ask the price when/if I can get round to making the call.

@Fifipopopo

Zoom assessment with the adhd centre is £695. F2F is £895.

Medication titration appts are £215 a month, plus cost of private prescription from local pharmacy which varies by pharmacy.

The gov.uk website says you need to inform
The DVLA * IF * your adhd or meds impact your ability to drive. There’s no more elaboration than that. I do not believe either the condition or my meds impact my ability to drive (if anything Concerta makes me a better driver, but I am perfectly ok without).

I've just seen this, it's about the ADHD diagnosis system in France
Most of it's based on diagnosis for children, but it's told from an adult point of view. It's very long, but informative and reflects life as the parent of a neurodivergent child preet much the same as it is here.
english.emmaclit.com/2021/03/18/lucine-and-enzo/

It's written by the same talented lady who wrote 'The Mental Load.

You do know there are different types of Adhd to those thinking anyone with Adhd is a danger on the roads .
Not every time is hyperactive some are in attentive. Some actually are more pre disposed to hyper focus.
You need a proper assessment otherwise you'll fall foul of dangerous misconceptions.