To ask how long it takes to know whether your DC has settled at secondary school?

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DC2 (ASD and communication issues) had a disastrous end to primary school with severe anxiety, daily meltdowns and generally being miserable.

He has an EHCP and everyone assumed secondary school would be really difficult for him , even with support.

He has speech difficulties so he does not have the confidence to involve himself with his peers and prefers to hang out only with his best friend. He masks in school. He does not engage with his classmates or teachers.

Week 1 was surprisingly positive with minimal outbursts at home. He has found it hard to adjust to the new routine and so far has tried to escape his homework, but generally he has coped.

He does not enjoy school but says it is ok. His form teacher made a simple comment over the phone about him not needing an EHCP at his next review.

Is it too early to say “he has settled” and he is going to manage ok?

I hope this is it for him and he’ll be happy but am I getting too ahead of myself?

If you have a child with ASD who fell apart at secondary , when did it happen ?

Not quite the same issues, and as I am sure you know by now, being settled is often just a lull before the next storm.

Having said that, secondary has lots of benefits - a rigid timetable, you don't get promised an afternoon of art only to be told that they didn't cover as much maths in the morning so art is cancelled, looking at you yr6! The teachers vary so although you might get a few awful ones you only have them a couple of hours a week. Often you move around which is good for those who appreciate movement breaks. It also means you are not always next to the same child. At least it is going well so far so be cautiously optimistic.

I would say give it a few months. My son seemed fine but it was definitely a honeymoon period for the first few months. Definitely it is early days.

Amy school that made a judgement that quickly would ring sure fire alarm bells in my head.

He has an ehcp. If they are following it he'll be coping. He has it because he needs those things to cope.

That is a basic level understanding any school staff member should have.

Sadly schools will try and get rid of it because it costs them money.

My ds secondary told me how much he was coping. He wasn't. They blocked my EHCP application at every turn. Turned up to tribunal and told judge he didn't need one. He was off school with school anxiety and under Camhs who diagnosed this!

We got the ehcp. He went to a different school who understood asd. (It was also MS. The first school was a Ms academy)

My ds manages better at secondary than primary too, despite fears that he would never cope with mainstream secondary. For pretty much the reasons Cattitude suggests plus we have been extremely lucky with our SENCO who really gets him (the primary teachers were lovely but not really on his wavelength).
However we did have the experience that when he changed primary schools aged 8 the falling apart happened after an apparently very successful first term. He somehow held it together for a term then broke down. So I would go with cautious optimism rather than unalloyed relief!
Don’t let him lose the EHCP no matter how well it goes this year. He still has puberty to come and you don’t know how that will affect him. It has been really useful over the years in all kinds of ways. (He’s just started y10 now.)

Best of luck, will keep fingers crossed for you both.

I think it's too soon and unless the form tutor is an expert on your DS's condition, I think it was inappropriate to comment on the EHCP. I wouldn't do anything about that yet but I would hope that the SENCO is in contact before the half term break.

However, as @Cattitudes says, secondary school has benefits for students with ASD in terms of the routine and predictability. Year 7 will be helped to be in the right place at the right time which probably helps your DS. Secondary classrooms are quieter than primary ones in my experience - I have been teaching for 27 years and have just done some primary teaching alongside my secondary work - and again, this might be a better environment for your DS. I hope he continues to make progress.

A mixed bag. It is still early days and I was sceptical at the form tutors comment but I think it was a passing comment.

I will stick to cautious optimism .

Never let an ehcp go.

NEVER EVER.

he's coping because he has it. If things are going well then keep it the same. If things change for the worse you have it to build on.

If you let it go and things change you start again. That can be 2 years then of not getting what he needs to be coping.

Right now it appears he is.

Honestly - any (so called) professional who thinks they can make such a judgement after a week needs treating very suspiciously.

For a start it is t even teachers who have an in put. It's OTs, Ed pysch s and speech and language etc.