To let DS skip school for this?

[Skiveornot]

My best friend lives abroad and has a DC the same age as my DS.

They’re back for a visit and in our city for one day next Friday (children start older in her country so her DD isn’t in school yet). She suggested we take the kids somewhere special. Ds would love it, but feel very guilty about skipping school - I am a big rule follower!

Aibu to call in sick to school and let him skip to have a fun day?

Also, he’d tell on me, right?!?!

(DS is in early primary.)

I wouldn't think twice about it. There is more to life than school.

Does your child know your friend’s child well? If yes I would be honest and let them have the day off.
If not. Then no.

I would have said no before the pandemic, but now I say just do it.

I would call in sick because even if they know you're lying they can pretend otherwise. You being honest only messes with their stats

I take dd out of school for the odd day to do fun stuff. Schools didn't object to shutting for months during the pandemic so I don't feel it's a big issue like I used to. I tell them the truth about what I'm doing though and don't lie about it.

Go. It sounds like a nice experience for your son and, as a one-off, will have no impact on his education.
Please don't lie about him being ill, though. We have a large number of vulnerable (and some CEV) staff in school. Everyone's in and vaccinated, but each time a child goes off sick (especially with vague symptoms that could be anything) it does ramp up the anxiety levels.

The pandemic has done weird things to my perception of how important a school day is. A few years ago I'd think you were insane to consider having a day off school to go and play. But then we've had so many days where our kids couldn't play with friends, and I think I've found a different balance. I'd definitely take the day off, but I'd probably feel naughty all day

Tell your son on Friday that it's Saturday

Be honest - it will be appreciated. It will be unauthorised but that's it. Have a lovely day.

Definitely go for it

Call in sick, most parents do it at least once in their child's education. He'll manage just fine missing one day and he'll have a lovely time. Say he has a normal tummy bug if you have to give a reason.

I promise it won't raise anyone's anxiety levels to find out he was 'ill'

Can’t believe so many people are saying lie. Why on earth would you do that?

@Branleuse

i would do it and call in sick to save them the paperwork

How does it save paperwork ? Isn't it just an 'unauthorised absence' rather than 'authorised'? Just a tick in a different box?

YABU for calling in sick.

Your DS will let the cat out of the bag.

Just remember that although the school won't be able to put it down as authorised they can't stop you going.

Be honest with the school. You don't want your child to have to lie to everyone. That wouldn't be fair.

"Mental health days are a thing aren't they? Given Covid times I reckon ds's mh will be well boosted seeing his friends!!"

This is why people roll their eyes when people say they have mental health issues and think it's just an excuse to avoid work.

Depending on where you are, will you receive a fine if your child is marked as an unauthorised absence? It's handled at council level where I am, so the school gets no say.

Just something to consider - that your day out might end up more expensive than anticipated.

be honest. I've taken mine out for adhok days for things that cant be on a weekend - a sporting event, a theatre show, and yes, a visit with friends from overseas. I just email the school the day before and factually state

'DC will not be in school on XXX as we are going to XXX event. I understand that this will be unauthorised'

I usually get back 'thanks for letting us know, have a good time'!

@Antinerak

Call in sick, most parents do it at least once in their child's education. He'll manage just fine missing one day and he'll have a lovely time. Say he has a normal tummy bug if you have to give a reason.

I promise it won't raise anyone's anxiety levels to find out he was 'ill'

I realise replying to this post now is entirely pointless as the thread has died, but it's so irritated me that I have to!

Unless you're miraculously present in every school in the UK, you can't possibly 'promise it won't raise anyone's anxiety levels'.

I have a TA who is vulnerable, as is her husband and her extremely elderly mother, for whom she cares. Children from her small group interventions going sick for ill-defined reasons make her anxious. She is not alone in this. Don't underestimate just how stressful it was to be in schools over the past year and a half - such stress has a cumulative effect.

Think her (and me) ridiculous, by all means, but don't deny other people's experience just because it isn't yours.

As a one off for a specific reason I would have no issue taking a 6yo out for the day. Its not a significant time of the school year (if it was his first week then I might say not to take him out as the first week or so is often the most important for younger kids when it comes to settling in) or an important school year (he's 6 not 16) so he's unlikely to miss anything significant. Additionally your DS will probably just rat you out anyway when he goes back and it's not fair to expect him to lie about being ill because someone will ask him about it on Monday, even if it's just the TA asking "Are you feeling better this week?".

Unless you're pulling him out for a day out every few weeks or you keep him home for every single sniffle then one single day of "unauthorised" absence is unlikely to trigger any kind of official consequence so just be honest with the school and enjoy the day out with your friend.

Do you do drop off/pick up personally? If so I might just be worth having a word with the teacher early next week to explain the situation - friend visiting and being available for one day only so you will be taking DS to see them on Friday - and ask them about the official procedure for informing them of DS's absence. When I used to work at a school, if a parent came and gave us the heads up that their child wouldn't be in because of a one off event we would usually unofficially tell them to go and enjoy the event and suggest they officially "call in sick" on the day (that way the child doesn't have to lie as the teacher knows the truth) or advise them as to how to word any letter they send in to include the right words/phrases that would allow us to class it as an authorised absence.