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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think the Reception settling-in period is way too slow?

123 replies

MerryMarigold · 07/09/2021 16:26

It struck me today as I work in a preschool and had 2 of my summer leavers come to visit me, who are starting Reception and neither of them were in school! Chatting to mums they told me of the very slow start to Reception and I was really surprised. I had a 2 year old start today (about 28 months), who was in from 9am-12pm. The only time she cried was at pick up time because she didn't want to go home! Now, I'm well aware not all kids are like that, and sometimes we call parents to pick their children up if they are very upset and they build up to longer periods maybe over a week (max) but to be honest, this is quite rare. Others who are a bit older, like two 3 year olds who started yesterday, will stay till after lunch for a couple of days and then do a full day (no tears or clinginess from them either), just having loads of fun.

So why is the default Reception settling-in so ridiculously drawn out? These children are 4 going on 5 and the majority have been in a preschool or nursery for at least a year already so used to being in a setting for a decent length of time. I said Goodbye to my 4 year olds in the Summer and they were more than ready for school, yet for Reception they are going in for 1 hr a day for several days then 2 hours, then lunch, very gradually building to a whole day. I'm just shocked it takes so long (sometimes 3-4 weeks) to go to a full school day. I'm sure kids are well able to handle much more than this so it feels like really low expectations to me. Obviously if a child was really struggling the school could be flexible on hours, but I believe the majority of children could go all day within a week without a fuss. My own kids are now in Y10 and Y8 and it definitely wasn't that slow for them.

Is there a decent rationale for this? Do other countries do it so slowly? Do parents prefer it this way? What do you all think?

OP posts:
TeenMinusTests · 07/09/2021 16:30

Different schools do thing differently.
Some are very slow.
Some just go for it (and say take yours out if too much).

Every school will believe they are doing what is best for the children.
Some schools will also take into account the fact that parents work and random hours for half a term is difficult if previously the child has been in nursery full time.

TeenMinusTests · 07/09/2021 16:31

I believe in theory you have the right to say you want full time hours straight away.
Though in practice if yours is the only child there...

WonderWoman1234 · 07/09/2021 16:32

I thought it was a bit bonkers when my kid started. Vererrrry slow!

LakeShoreD · 07/09/2021 16:32

Mine is in a private school but it’s been full time from day 1. How do 2 working parents even handle that? Is someone just expected to take 3-4 weeks off work? I’d also be interested to know what the rationale is, my 6 month old was FT at nursery after 3 settle sessions and does longer days than my DD does at school.

Barkingdog · 07/09/2021 16:34

None of the primary schools that my DC have attended have done this. They've been been straight in full time from the start. It must be very difficult for working parents.

SprogletsMum · 07/09/2021 16:34

I always assumed it was to help the teachers to get to know the children more easily in small groups.
Its alright having one or two new starters join an existing group but imagine trying to get to know 30 in one go.

Threearm · 07/09/2021 16:34

Ours have done 1 day half the year, 1 day the other half and on the 3rd all in together. Full days from the start.

MyCatEatsPrawnCrackers · 07/09/2021 16:34

I have worked in several schools and most did the slow transition into Reception thing. My most recent school had all Reception children in right from the first day although that was probably because 95% of them have already attended the attached Nursery.

LivingNextDoorToNorma · 07/09/2021 16:34

I’m assuming it must vary massively from school to school. Dc started reception yesterday, and went straight into a full day. As far as I know, the other schools in the town are the same.

HungryHippo11 · 07/09/2021 16:36

I think that is unusual, doing an hour at a time and taking 4 weeks to build up to full days.

My daughter started yesterday, doing 2 weeks of half days (8.50 to 12) and then full days. This is by far the slowest compared to other locals who are mainly doing a couple of half days and then full days. Almost all schools will be full time by the beginning of next week.

MerryMarigold · 07/09/2021 16:36

These schools sound much more sensible! I'm on the edge of London, suburbia.

OP posts:
Mynameismargot · 07/09/2021 16:36

I'm in Ireland and usually here for the first week or 2 they finish around 12 so in my kids school it is 8:40 to 12 then a normal school after that. It worked fine for my children but a full day which ends here at 1:30/2 depending on start time would have been fine too.

welshweasel · 07/09/2021 16:36

We had three weeks of this nonsense last year. Mine had been in full time nursery since he was 4 months old. We really struggled as I’d used up all my leave when the nursery closed during covid. We both work full time. Thankfully our nursery were happy to keep him on until they went full time but it was really unnecessary.

TheCanyon · 07/09/2021 16:38

A parent in my dts nursery class complained that their child was entitled to full time education, so that year when starting p1 they had to do full days straight away, the mum was NOT popular for quite a long time.

PepsiHoover · 07/09/2021 16:39

My DC didn't have any settling in period. They go straight to full days. Most of the DC attend either school nursery, so are used to the setting beforehand. Or have been to private nursery/childcare/preschool and are used to longer days.

tealandteal · 07/09/2021 16:39

My DS went in for a half day at the end of summer, 15 mins today with us to meet the teacher and then full days from tomorrow. He had the option to do half days for the first week (3days) but he and most of his friends are doing full days. Seems strange to drag it out so much!

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 07/09/2021 16:40

My younger DD found the 3 day settling in period disorientating when she started... she just wanted to get on with it.

I can see the benefit for teachers... but it confuses half the kids.

PepsiHoover · 07/09/2021 16:40

Do these schools not have a nursery attached to the school I wonder? To me, that was the point or nursery, to get them used to school.

Dixiechickonhols · 07/09/2021 16:42

Private was full time from day 1. My observation has been the more middle class/sort after the school the more convoluted the arrangements I suspect to deter families applying who didn’t have sahm or on hand grandparents. It’s very unsettling for children to be in cobbled together uncertain childcare set ups.

MerryMarigold · 07/09/2021 16:43

@TheCanyon

A parent in my dts nursery class complained that their child was entitled to full time education, so that year when starting p1 they had to do full days straight away, the mum was NOT popular for quite a long time.
Weren't parents delighted too have their kids in full time quickly?
OP posts:
brittleheadgirl · 07/09/2021 16:43

My class just come in full time from the off, we had a few tears on day 1, barely any on day 2 and by day 3 all were happily coming in.
I hate the idea of a slow, drawn out settling in process, I think it just prolongs it for the children and actually gives them a false impression of how the school day & week is structured.

Weird to think we're already operating as normal and all happy & settled, while others have barely set foot in school yet!

FuckingFlumps · 07/09/2021 16:43

@TheCanyon

A parent in my dts nursery class complained that their child was entitled to full time education, so that year when starting p1 they had to do full days straight away, the mum was NOT popular for quite a long time.
Why was she not popular? She's absolutely entitled to ask for a full time place straight away and in my experience when teaching reception the quicker we get them in full time the better. Prattling about with a million half days is way more disruptive and unsettling for the vast majority of children and definitely leads to increased anxiety in the new starters.
WildCherryBlossom · 07/09/2021 16:44

My eldest had half days for 2 weeks (9-12:30 iirc) we moved areas before the younger siblings started primary and at their school they started a bit late on day 1 (to avoid the crowds of bigger children) do 9:30 on the first day until 3 and then straight to normal days from day 2. It does vary a lot from school to school.

brittleheadgirl · 07/09/2021 16:45

@TheCanyon
What an odd reaction from the other parents. Sounds like the mum who complained had the right idea!

HungryHippo11 · 07/09/2021 16:47

@welshweasel

We had three weeks of this nonsense last year. Mine had been in full time nursery since he was 4 months old. We really struggled as I’d used up all my leave when the nursery closed during covid. We both work full time. Thankfully our nursery were happy to keep him on until they went full time but it was really unnecessary.
For every kid who has been at nursery full time for 4 years, there is a kid who has done less than a year of 15 (or fewer) hours a week of preschool. Maybe its not so unnecessary for them -
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