To suspect DS1 has sensory issues

[cadburyegg]

please be nice, I am totally ignorant about this kind of thing. I don't know if what I am concerned about is typical child behaviour, sensory issues, or me just struggling with his behaviour. School have not raised any concerns but his Y1 teacher did note that he was very sensitive.

DS1 is 6.5 and I've come to the conclusion that he must have some degree of sensory issues. There's some examples below:

• fussy about some types of clothing, won't wear jumpers (unless he has to, for school), has started asking me to cut out the labels in clothing
• fussy eater, won't try new foods
• won't tolerate having his hair cut in a regular salon - I took him to a hairdresser who specialises in cutting kids' hair who have autism or sensory issues, and even that was a bit of a struggle
• extremely, painfully shy
• struggles with major separation anxiety - left him in floods of tears on his 2nd day of Y2 last week
• has major meltdowns and tantrums about the smallest of things. DS2 is 3 and tantrums less than DS1. Examples include DS1 asking for chicken sandwiches then having a meltdown when he was given chicken sandwiches because he'd decided he wanted cheese sandwiches. His grandparents dropped him off after a couple of days with them and when they left he threw himself to the floor and started kicking and screaming. He went to school during the winter lockdown with a kw place and was upset when school reopened to everyone because it was "too much for me, mummy"

Another reason why I struggle with if this behaviour is standard is because I recognise some of the behaviours as ones I used to do myself when I was younger- I was fussy with scratchy clothes, fussy eater, would tantrum about everything.

Any thoughts? And what can I do next/how can I support him.

I have similar thoughts about my DD7, but like you many of the things she does I did as a child too. I don’t think she is particularly different to her peers at times, then sometimes I think she really sticks out.

She flaps her hands, a lot, in excitement. She dislikes restrictive clothing, but soon adjusts to it, then I worry she is masking. She is very sensitive and struggles to regulate her emotions at times, but is improving (or masking!!).

Does your DS struggle with noise at all?

I think I would start by sitting down and talking to the senco of the school. They will be able to advise and should know the paths locally.

Maybe worth a phone call to the GP to ask for a referral to community paediatrics to see if an autism assessment or similar is needed

Asda and m and s both do sensory friendly clothes for uniform which have no labels in, they also do socks which are fantastic. My little boy is autististic with sensory processing disorder. For him he is not so much fussy with food but cannot stand certain textures, certain smells and doesn't like food that is particularly changeable in taste. So he will eat apples and bannanas as not changeable but does not like alot of other fruit which changes season to season such as strawberries. I have found some makes of clothes are much softer and my son prefers. My son gets overwhelmed by certain sensory experiences, he doesn't like noise but for its different for every child. We build in sensory breaks where we can sit somewhere quietly. With food my son would struggle with choice, maybe do a weeks plan of what eating or even daily to avoid argument as he knows what to expect. He can help with choices.

My little boy also finds things like fidgets like poppits helpful to regulate, also things like playdoh, trampoline, swings and bubbles. He also uses weighted blanket and these means he is less likely to get upset as it allows him to process things more easily.

DD was very similar at that age-we coped by buying sensory friendly clothing and being very patient with food and loud noises! As a teen, she still doesn’t cope too well with new stuff but is fine with clothes now etc. It doesn’t necessarily mean ASD-it could be just a blip, it could be SPD.

I think there are enough flags there to make pursuing assessment a worthwhile thing. But it takes a long time. There are a lot of sensory things there, and possibly some hints at social communication issues too.

Ultimately a diagnosis (if it’s there) would be like a key to unlocking who he really is - at least that’s how it felt for me wrt to my child.

Also - my child’s diagnosis has made me look at myself (and DH) in a new light.