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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

new baby friend struggling to conceive ...

5 replies

scruffymama · 04/09/2021 08:24

I had a beautiful baby boy 7 weeks ago and mostly its all going well but I do have an awkward situation with a friend of mine. My partner and I are good friends with her and her partner. They have always been more my partners friends but because we are all in a foreign country and he doesn't connect with many people, I made a big effort with this couple.
However things have been a bit strange recently. My friend has had several rounds of IVF but it has not been successful and she is now 42. This has been something she has really struggled with and I really feel for her. I worried she would not want to see me anymore when i had the baby. Instead she has been very invasion, judgement about my choices during the pregnancy (what i ate and did, medicines i took) and very nosy now the baby is here. She always wants to know all the details of his doctors visits and every last detail of his care. I feel she may be judging me a bit and of course it must have something to do with her own desire for a child. But i am not comfortable and i don't really want her involved so much in his upbringing. I know that sounds horrible ! Her husband has been very strange with me too, never congratulated me on the birth of the child and generally miserable and dismissive towards me. To top it all off they bombard us with whatsapp messages and photos always wanted to be in contact and very needy ! Im getting feed up with them but really don't want bad feeling i keep waiting for them to get some sense.

OP posts:
TestingTestingWonTooFree · 04/09/2021 08:26

Time to back off. Become more busy, less available.

PumpkinPatch21 · 04/09/2021 08:29

Back away. Don't answer the messages and become unavailable. It's awful they are struggling but it doesn't give them a right to behave like that.

BunnytheFriendlyDragon · 04/09/2021 08:30

If these requests are in messages, ignore them and then reply one in a while with a breezy we're fine, how are you etc

If in person, see then less

Member984815 · 04/09/2021 08:35

Draw back a bit , put them On an information diet . Don't answer any invasive messages . What has your husband said about it

scruffymama · 04/09/2021 08:40

My husband is only starting to get annoyed now as they message him too ;) He is the type who rarely finds fault with people .. can be annoying. He would hate to fall out with them. The other couple know this so they may be winding me up like this deliberately, or maybe I'm thinking too much !

OP posts:
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