Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think we should do away with girls/ boys uniforms?

239 replies

MerryMarigold · 02/09/2021 12:51

Can't we just have a gender neutral uniform? Trousers, jumper, shirt, maybe tie
My daughter literally NEVER wears skirts outside of school but obviously ALL the girls wear skirts to school even though trousers are permitted.

A. It would help those struggling with what they identify as wouldn't need to make any massive statements via uniform.

B. The cost of girls uniform (usually) is ridiculous and much higher than boys. My daughter's school has a specific skirt and specific blouse (skirt is 30.00 alone!) where whereas boys have generic grey trousers and generic white shirts.

It seems schools have bought into/ contribute to/ emphasise this very distinct boys/ girls gendered clothing. I hate it!

OP posts:
splodgemaster · 02/09/2021 16:13

I like uniforms. I prefer skirts myself and my dd does too. No chance she'd be wearing trousers to school with or without uniform.
I prefer uniform because it's one thing out the way in rather stressful mornings in our household but that's just my home I suppose. I also hardly ever buy any extra dc clothing in term time so it works out cheaper.

UserStillatLarge · 02/09/2021 16:17

This is a "your school" problem. Plenty of girls wear trousers at DC's school so wearing them will not mean you stand out. And the choice is generic skirt or generic trousers for much the same cost.

aNewYorkerInLondon · 02/09/2021 16:42

I wore a uniform from age 5 until I graduated at 17. In primary school it was a blue pinafore-style dress, white collared shirt or turtleneck, navy blue tights or white socks, and brown lace up leather shoes. If cold, a navy jumper or school logo sweatshirt was allowed. No logos (besides the school logo) of any kind allowed. No jewelry of any kind allowed. No nail polish and definitely no makeup allowed. Our gym uniform was a plain white shirt and red school-issued athletic shorts. Once in middle school and high school (age 11-17), the pinafore dress was still allowed but we were given the option of also an a-line blue skirt (same fabric as the dress), and from November-February, we also had the cold weather-appropriate options of a wool kilt (headmistress was Scottish) or navy blue corduroy trousers. Also, in addition to brown lace up shoes, we could wear predominantly white trainers (nothing flashy). Still no logos, minimal, understated jewelry, minimal makeup, no nail polish or too-long nails.

At any given time, I owned two uniform skirts, five uniform shirts, one navy jumper, five pairs of navy tights, five pairs of white socks, and one pair of school shoes. It all fit in one drawer and I got dressed every morning in a matter of minutes. For weekends, I had usually a couple sets of "play" clothes and a couple of dressy outfits. None of these clothes were replaced until they were worn out or too small. There was never any pressure about what to wear to school - it was easy. I loved it!

It also taught me the lesson of right time, right place, right clothes. Play clothes are for play. School clothes are for school. Same as for adults, work clothes should not be the same as gym clothes or hiking clothes or clubbing clothes, or gardening clothes, etc.

My school was all girls, so there was no boy/girl differentiation; however, we had a huge range of incomes, and the uniform was very much an equalizer. I didn't really know who in my school's families had money and whose didn't until we started driving and a few classmates had brand new cars and the rest of us had old used cars or borrowed our parents' car.

I didn't realize how much clothing kids who didn't wear a uniform owned until I got to university with two suitcases and all the other girls showed up with trunk loads of clothes! My mother says the uniform was definitely a cost save for her (even if my school fees were not!)

I would seriously hesitate to send my child to a school that did not have a uniform.

As far as gender-specificity for a uniform goes, I agree with the many posters that say all kids at a school, at least once they are 11+years old, should be allowed to choose between all uniform options, which should include a knee-length skirt option, a trousers option, and perhaps a knee-length shorts option and kilt. Knee-length was always easy to achieve because my mom would buy the skirts extra long and put in the first hem to the knee as a very deep hem (no trimming off the extra length), then just take out the hem and let it down a bit every time I grew taller. These skirts were made of this indestructible royal blue canvas and lasted forever. They actually became better with age because they'd soften a bit which was more comfortable. Everyone hated having to retire an old skirt for a new one and having to "break it in" again. We even experimented with one in chemistry class. It wouldn't burn or melt or scorch, and even hydrochloride acid barely made a mark on it!
^
Short version:^ As a student, I loved wearing a uniform for many reasons and strongly advocate for the reasonable use (and subsidy, as needed) of them in schools.

Hemingwaycat · 02/09/2021 16:46

I have 2 DD’s and both like wearing school skirts. One of my DD’s wouldn’t want to wear trousers at all. I think every girl deserves the choice, I don’t think skirts should ever be enforced (I know this is still sadly the case in a lot of schools) but I equally don’t think trousers should be.

PaperMonster · 02/09/2021 16:52

I have a daughter who won’t wear the school-type trousers as she finds them uncomfortable; she’ll wear a skirt but often finds them uncomfy around her waist and prefers a pinafore dress. I really am dreading secondary school and their restrictive dress codes. Out of school she wears very baggy trousers as they are comfy. I really do wish we could get rid of uniforms altogether. They serve no purpose.

gogohm · 02/09/2021 17:15

Mine lived wearing skirts and pinafores are great for when they are little. Why should gender neutral mean wearing traditionally boys clothes??? We are sitting here now, all adult women (4 of us) and all of us are in dresses out of choice

CuntyMcBollocks · 02/09/2021 17:28

Just because your DD prefers trousers, doesn't mean that every other schoolgirl wants/has to wear them. My DD absolutely refuses to wear trousers. It's her choice.

Poppitt58 · 02/09/2021 17:34

Kids should wear what they’re comfortable in, my daughter hasn’t worn a skirt or dress since Reception, through her own choice. She wears trousers and shorts. My son lives in shorts whatever the weather.

Poppitt58 · 02/09/2021 17:36

To clarify, I think skirts and dresses should be on the uniform list, I was just highlighting that I don’t think it’s restrictive. Insisting girls must wear trousers is restricting their choices.

Snog · 02/09/2021 17:44

We need to ditch uniform completely.
Most other countries don't find it necessary for kids to wear school uniform.

PlanDeRaccordement · 02/09/2021 18:03

@Poppitt58

To clarify, I think skirts and dresses should be on the uniform list, I was just highlighting that I don’t think it’s restrictive. Insisting girls must wear trousers is restricting their choices.
I don’t agree because U.K. is already very classist and uniforms are the only thing keeping classism in check in schools. You’d have posh kids wearing a different pair of designer trainers and designer clothes every day...and the poorer kids would be trying to keep up with that. As much as parents cannot afford a £35 blazer for uniform now, they definitely cannot afford over a dozen £1000 outfits.
Popcornriver · 02/09/2021 18:04

Another poster who agrees with just scrapping uniform or at least not making it mandatory. Have a compulsory school hoodie for trips if it's needed for safety concerns and leave it at that.

Uniform rules are becoming a bit much really. Yes it's lovely seeing them smart and in primary it's cost effective but it's not once they get to secondary. Then the fussiness of school shoes with logos, not the right pleat in the skirt. They're there to learn, let them be comfortable.

DilysPhyllis · 02/09/2021 18:41

Our primary just list all the uniform items as 'pupils may wear.....'. There are a few girls who wear shorts and trousers but I haven't noticed any boys in skirts or dresses, theres no rule to say they can't though.

lyntheyresexpeople · 02/09/2021 18:49

Ermm no - my dd loves the gingham summer dresses, if trousers are permitted your dd can wear them. Why on earth should other children not be able to wear what they want, so yours feels better about wearing what she wants??

AllTheSingleLadiess · 02/09/2021 18:49

School trousers rarely fit kids properly as it's assumed that kids bodies fall into like 6 body types - tall, plus, regular, skinny, super skinny and slim.

My dad wore pinafores in KS1 because it's impossible to get skirts that fit well. When she left y11 (age 15-16) she wore school skirts in size 10-11 because the waist on bigger sizes was too big.

I think that uniform like plain black joggers would work better because it's easier to find well fitting clothes when you're not confined to the narrow range of school clothes available. (Plus the Teflon in trousers made my day excema much worse.

AllTheSingleLadiess · 02/09/2021 18:51

The best thing to do might be for children to pick which uniform they'd like. I loved gingham in the summer as a parent and child plus I think secondary boys could do with a tweak to their summer uniform. Long trousers are uncomfortable in July

ILoveAnOwl · 02/09/2021 19:07

My school has brought in a 'dress code'. Black bottoms (can be trousers, skirts, shorts, joggers- whatever), white top (polo shirt, normal shirt, t-shirt -whatever) and a navy jumper (hoodie, fleece, cardi- whatever). We spend far less time patrolling uniform and more time actually teaching and supporting the pupils. Exam results not affected, behaviour incidents and bullying both gone down (not saying this is soley attributed to the change in uniform, just that there's been no negative changes.

Islamorada · 02/09/2021 19:12

Absolutely not, Your DD can wear trousers and tie if you or her want to but my daughter loves her skirt.

purplesequins · 02/09/2021 19:12

I ghonk school uniforms are a load of nonsense.
my dc are (now) at a school without and it is bliss.
they wear jeans & jumpers comfortable clothes that allow them to be active, are easy to wash and laundry has decreased a lot.

imo uk school uniforms are not the leveller it's said to be. the differences between 'poor' and 'better off' can be stark.

reluctantbrit · 02/09/2021 20:59

School trousers rarely fit kids properly as it's assumed that kids bodies fall into like 6 body types - tall, plus, regular, skinny, super skinny and slim.

I was very surprised when DD's school brought in trousers for the girls and they actually come in a variety of styles/cuts and my quite curvy DD looks great in them. At least one supplier decided to think and get the designer creating something decent.

If only they weren't made from 100% polyester, they will be awful in Summer, I never see girls wearing them in Summer, only in Winter.

Thatsjustwhatithink · 02/09/2021 21:18

@Abitofalark

Ah, 'abolish female clothing and make girls wear standard male clothing but not make boys wear female clothing and this we will label "gender neutral"'.
Nailed it
AngelPrint · 02/09/2021 21:34

DD would never wear the trousers at school. Strictly a skirt for her so I think YABU.

No need to get rid of things considered feminine just to please others. Some girls like feminine styles and would be upset at ring forced to be neutral or masculine. That’s not fair on them.

I realise feminine and masculine are concepts but for the sake of this thread I’m using them.

So no, I don’t think you should take away feminine things so as not to upset those who don’t want them.

As I see all too often lately, taking away girls options to please others is just another form of discrimination.

To make things fair we give should give ALL uniform options to ALL genders/groups. We don’t remove choice - we add to it.

AngelPrint · 02/09/2021 21:36

@Abitofalark

Ah, 'abolish female clothing and make girls wear standard male clothing but not make boys wear female clothing and this we will label "gender neutral"'.
This was much more to the point than mine but yes, THIS!
Thadhiya · 02/09/2021 21:39

"Gender neutral" clothing always means "wear boys clothes because it's just easier."

Blah to that.

DariaMorgendorffer · 02/09/2021 21:42

@Abitofalark

Ah, 'abolish female clothing and make girls wear standard male clothing but not make boys wear female clothing and this we will label "gender neutral"'.
This!